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| Hi John,
How can you resolve a disagreement when you can’t even agree on the facts?
If you’ve ever encountered this challenge, or have ever wondered about it, today’s Q&A offers a few ideas.
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| | | | Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue | |
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| What to Do When You Disagree about FACTS | | by Ryan Trimble |
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| I have a question about FACTS. There has been increasing public debate over facts and, it seems, increased disregard for science. I’ve seen this at work and home. For example, my mother-in-law suggested that my wife and I buy a certain crib when our baby was born. When we showed her the crib had been proven to harm babies and was banned, she said, “Well that study is wrong.”
At work people continually speak of “learning styles” even though the initial study that forwarded the idea has been disproven. Again, facts and research will indicate one thing, but people will still rely on their gut feeling.
So, how do you hold a conversation with someone who refuses to acknowledge evidence related to the disagreement? I’m not referring to differences of opinions, but to disregarding facts or evidence. I can see how Seeking Mutual Purpose might help, but the debate over evidence still takes a lot of energy. Where should I start?
Signed,
Frustrated in Fact
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| When Covid-19 arrived in the United States in early 2020 and the country was awash in questions about its origins, a relative of mine was certain that the virus was not what officials said it was, wasn’t dangerous, and probably wasn’t even real.
I shared a different perspective, citing information that I believed was reliable, but she was firm in her stance.
“How could she!” I thought. Feeling indignant, I determined I would do what many of us do when another person is skeptical of what we deem to be facts: I would bludgeon her with more facts!
Being a writer, I decided to do this by letter. Just as militaries launch missiles a safe distance from their targets, I would send my missive from the safety of my home office.
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| | | WEBINAR
| | Skills that Set Apart the Best Leaders from the Rest | | Join Joseph Grenny, cofounder of Crucial Learning, and learn how to influence and lead others with vital behaviors that get results. | | | |
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| | | EBOOK | | How to Build a Speak-Up Culture with Crucial Conversations® and the SDI® | | The combination of powerful personal and interpersonal insights from the SDI and the proven dialogue skills from Crucial Conversations equip your team to better manage their perspective and behaviors, form healthier relationships, and interact more productively. | | |
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| | | Oct 28–Nov 1 | | Crucial Conversations® for Mastering Dialogue | | Join us live online and learn how to:
Resolve conflict. Speak your mind truthfully and tactfully. Reach alignment when stakes are high and opinions vary. Navigate the most important interactions at home and work. | | | |
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| | | | | Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. | | | | | |
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