“Weaponized incompetence ” is screwing women over

Back when I was editor of HuffPost Divorce (RIP), there was a viral blog post we published titled “She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes By The Sink.” Of course, the writer’s wife didn’t actually leave him for this singular reason; rather, it’s what the action — or inaction — represented.

″[My wife] didn’t want to be my mother,” Matthew Fray wrote in the blog. “She wanted to be my partner, and she wanted me to apply all of my intelligence and learning capabilities to the logistics of managing our lives and household. She wanted me to figure out all of the things that need to get done, and devise my own method of task management. I wish I could remember what seemed so unreasonable to me about that at the time.”

The idea he alludes to now has a buzzy name — “weaponized incompetence” — and it has gone viral on TikTok and across other social media platforms. It’s the act of feigning incompetence at any one task to get out of doing it, and it’s pervasive both at home and in the work place. Senior reporter Brittany Wong dives into it in this super interesting article.

Xo, Ashley Rockman

In case you missed it

Though “love bombing” may sounds like a good thing, it’s anything but. And naturally, it seems to be on the rise due to the pandemic and the nature of dating today. Thanks again, COVID! Love bombing is when someone showers a new potential love interest with intense displays of affection early on, only to ghost them or cut off the relationship. In today’s times, that could mean prolonged interaction over text and email — building up an artificial sense of intimacy — before ever meeting in person.

LOL

Thankfully my husband doesn’t like chocolate. But if he did…

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