A couple weeks ago, I was talking to my wife Michelle about the writing process.
“A first draft is always just verbal diarrhea,” I explained. “It’s a brain dump.”
“Yes, you have to start with an outline, but then you just have to let your thoughts pour out onto the page, no editing, no filter, no holding back.”
“You’ll end up with a mess, but like Michelangelo’s sculpture of David, the real work in creating art comes from chipping away at the block.”
In your first draft you must write without editing.
Things will come out in a way that you just never expect.
For example, I recently wrote the following excerpt for my new book, The Dark Side of Discipline.
I have no idea if any of it will remain in the book because it's such a complex idea that it almost demands a book of its own.
But you will likely find it instructive, and if nothing else, entertaining, and informative about how ol’ CB’s brain operates.
It could also throw you for a loop and put you in deep introspection mode — which, in my opinion, is almost always ultimately beneficial.
Either way… enjoy!
*****
When I was 10 years old, I discovered that my father was an alcoholic.
He drank all day, and when I came home from school, he was drunk...
I never knew which father would be waiting for me at 4pm when the bus let me off at the farm.
- Angry dad calling me lazy
- Crazy “let’s go do something dangerous” dad…
- Really, really drunk passed out on the floor dad
- Messed up dad who needed me to bail him out of trouble (like getting his tractor out of the mud)
Ed Mylett had a similar childhood.
“I had to figure out, at age 6, how to deal with my drunk dad,” Ed says.
“Eventually I learned — just by listening to the sound of his keys opening the front door — what type of mood he was in… angry, happy, or sad. I adjusted to it and controlled the situation.”
For Ed and I these were our “Batman” moments — a critical part of our origin story.
(If you don’t know the Batman origin story, it starts with a young Bruce Wayne witnessing a traumatic event between his parents and the criminal who would become The Joker.)
From our uncontrollable situations, Ed and I developed “superpowers”.
Ed’s superpower is the ability to read people. He turned this ability into a financial empire.
Mine was the ability to build systems that controlled the influence of external environments.
Research suggests children of alcoholics may exhibit the following characteristics:
- Seek control
- Take themselves very seriously
- Become super responsible (or irresponsible)
Hello, that’s me.
These traits can tilt positive or negative.
They could be harnessed for good or used for bad.
I translated my pain into the ability to design transformation programs for fitness, productivity, and beating bad habits.
Ed translated his pain into understanding people better than they understand themselves.
My friend Bedros Keuilian turned his childhood abuse into a form of Super Empathy that allows him to be a world-class coach and encourager.
Everyone that has had traumatic pain can turn it into a Superpower.
Once you see this in others, you can’t unsee it.
Within everyone exists a trauma that can be translated — perhaps transmuted is a better word, to steal a phrase from Napoleon Hill — into a superpower that leads to peak performance.
It is, unfortunately, difficult for most people to see in themselves… as they can’t see past the pain.
But our childhood trauma explains our adult behavior.
We can harness our trauma for good… or use it as an excuse for our bad behavior.
Ultimately, it is our choice — like everything in life.
Play the victim… or turn it into victory.
*****
Anyway, I just wanted to share that with you…
Because I think understanding this is one of the biggest keys for people to overcome their challenges & traumas, step into their greatness, and live a successful life.
Hope you found it helpful.
Success Loves Speed,
Craig
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