Republicans Are Jackholes And So Are Restaurant Customers. Your Weekly Top Ten

2 jahre vor


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Top o’ the Weekend to you, Wonkers! We assume
you are lounged out in your Hello Kitty snuggie, ready to catch up on your Wonket Top Ten reading list from the week. If you’re not, then take
care of that, and pour yourselves whatever pumpkin spice liquor you drink during the mornings.

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Okay, here is your weekend reading list, chosen as usual by the scientific method of
“counting”:

1. Oh look, it’s that new C.A. Pinkham brat with his “Off The Menu” restaurant stories, at the top of the list. We have a feeling this is going to be a
pattern. READ IT, IT IS SO GOOD.

2. Precious white people losing their damn minds over GMO salmon. NOTE: We got a lot of feedback on this piece, good and bad! It was very interesting,
and we’re sure we’ll revisit it again in the future.,

3. That idiot Nevada lawmaker Michele
Fiore decked her halls with tits and guns, and also more tits, on her crazy-ass Christmas card.

4. Oh look, it’s that C.A.
Pinkham’s FIRST story about the bad restaurant customers, placing again this week!

(4.5) This does not get its own
official number, because apparently a lot of people spent a hell of a lot of time on Pinkham’s author page this week. Were you all fapping at the time? You were fapping. We know you were fapping. If you need to go fap
again, be our guest.

5. The GOP candidates spent some time Jewsplaining how Jewishing works, to the Jewishes. It didn’t go well.

6. Sarah Palin sad about getting fired, Bristol being whore. You buy her book now?

7. Erick Erickson had thoughts about the Planned Parenthood shooting. They were bad thoughts.

8. Oh, look, another story
appearing for the second week in a row. If you haven’t read Wonkette journalism ‘splaining to the Daily Beast how it’s bad to misidentify mass shooters, you should do that now.

9. Carly Fiorina’s good with terrorists being able to buy guns, as long as they promise to use them responsibly.

10. And finally, Peggy Noonan will slur her way through her prayers if she wants to, you jerk.

So there you go,
Wonkers. That’s your assigned reading. And just in case you missed it at the top of the page, we'd like to remind you once more that we now
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Okay we love you bye!

Love,

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