FIVER LETTERS “Listening to [the above podcast] reminded me how disappointed I was that in the following years Tigers fans never went with a banner saying ‘Welcome to Hull’, especially given how much football fans (and the Fiver’s 1,057 pedants in particular) like a good pun. Similarly, I never understood why Eagles fans never used to sing “A Town Called Palace” although that could be the aforementioned pedants’ awareness that Crystal Palace is merely a triangular intersection across five local authorities and not actually a town” – Noble Francis. “I see that Manchester United have urged supporters to stay away from behind-closed-doors games if the season restarts. If they’re that serious about fans’ safety, they could always reappoint Mourinho. Or Van Gaal, to really flatten their curve” – Justin Kavanagh. “In BC (Canada), a town is using the span of an eagle on signs to give people an idea of what the safe distance of 2m (6ft 7in approx) is for social distancing. In the UK, you should maybe use a depiction of Peter Crouch” – James Boyle. “My nomination for football on TV (Fiver letters passim) is ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’. When George Lazenby as Bond arrives in Switzerland the agent trailing him is reading the Express. The back page headline is Why Brown Had To Go, and refers to the sacking of Allan Brown as Luton Town manager and his replacement by Alec Stock. Am I the only one who noticed?” – Nigel Davies. “Surely using a free app like WhatsApp some technical genius could organise a link to the club’s sound systems. Watch on TV and shout your head off down the line. You could get a great practically immediate crowd noise. Of course, it would need policing but technology should help” – Ian Findley. Send your letters to [email protected]. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’the day is … Justin Kavanagh. NEWS, BITS AND BOBS Hull have broken ranks to become the first Championship club to ask for the season so far to be voided, citing fears of legal action if players become infected with Covid-19. Adrian Mariappa has confirmed that he was the Watford player who tested positive for Covid-19. The defender said he is asymptomatic but that it was a big surprise because “I haven’t really left the house”. Two Watford staff members have also tested positive. Meanwhile, the general secretary of Fifpro says it would be “inhumane” for players such as Watford’s forward Troy Deeney to face disciplinary action if they refuse to return to action. “If players are being pressured or being brought into the context of disciplinary action for that, we feel it is very much unacceptable,” he said. The FA has written to WSL and Women’s Championship clubs informing them that the season is to be cut short. And Roberto Carlos has risked the wrath of CR7 and Lionel Messi groupies by choosing his former teammate Real Ronaldo as his GOAT. “Ronaldo is unique. He’s the best,” he cheered. “I think in our generation it was harder to score goals. It was more physical.” |