i can't be an old version of me and still evolve

When I experience a major life event, I change. An evolution of me occurs and I begin to discover a new me because I am a new me.

I should be. My life has changed. Seems pretty straightforward, doesn't it?

However, this new evolution will affect everyone around me.

And not everyone will enjoy this change. In fact, some will do their best to pull me back into the old version of me. 

This pushback will hurt and trip me up a bit, but I must keep moving forward with my evolution.

Because the thing is,

it’s impossible to be an old version of myself and evolve at the same time. Trying to do so will place me into a swamp of paralysis, stuck in-between alternate universes. I will then start to question my self-work and identity in an effort to accommodate others’ feeling more comfortable with my major life change.

And that, my friends, is the definition of toxic. Or should be.

Also, morphing backward isn’t compassionate to my loved ones, either, because I’m unable to offer my true self to them.

And my authentic self is a gift.

A bright, sunny present that deserves to be seen and loved and respected as I am today.

I must SHINE SHINE SHINE and give the world the whole of me.

So, why is it so f*cking hard to do?

I’m trying.

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love & peace,

amy dawn