Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, November 3 Chelsea Handler, considered by Commies to be a comedian, posted, If you're on a dating app, please ask someone on a date November 6th and then just take them to vote. That's the most romantic thing you can do right now. I sure am glad I am not a Commie or Dim. I can think of an awful lot of activities, that are more romantic! Have FUN! Dearwebby Today's Bonehead Award: Man facing trial on charges of attacking fiancee with chainsaw, dragging her through fire ______________________________________________________ Today, November 3 in 1957 Sputnik II was launched by the Soviet Union. It was the second manmade satellite to be put into orbit and was the first to put an animal into space, a dog named Laika. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
The greatest challenge to any thinker is stating the problem in a way that will allow a solution. --- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970) That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another.... --- Charles M. Schulz (1922 - 2000), ______________________________________________________ "So, what's the matter? I thought you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip with your husband." "Oh, everything went wrong: First he said I talked so loud I would scare the fish. Then he said I was using the wrong bait; and then that I was reeling in too soon. "All that might have been all right; but then, to make matters worse, I ended up catching twelve fish and he caught none!" ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A minister, having served the same church for many years, decided to leave and take a similar position in another church. Without telling anyone he had made this decision or writing a letter to the congregation, he waited until Sunday morning to announce his resignation in church. When he spoke to the congregation he said, "The same Jesus that called me to this church many years ago has now called upon me to leave and serve another church." The choir all stood and sang, "What a Friend We Have in Jesus." _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ An elderly man in Florida calls his son in New York. The father says to the son, "I hate to tell you, but we've got some troubles here in the house. Your mother and I can't stand each other anymore, and we're getting a divorce. I've had it! I want to live out the rest of my years in peace. I'm telling you now, so you and your sister shouldn't go into shock later when I move out." He hangs up, and the son immediately calls his sister in the Hamptons and tells her the news. The sister says, "I'll handle this!" She calls Florida and says to her father, "Don't do ANYTHING until we get there! We'll be there Wednesday night." The father agrees. He hangs up the phone and hollers to his wife, "Okay, they're coming for Thanksgiving, and they are paying for their own tickets. Now, what are we going to tell them for Christmas?" ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Robert Presley Jr., 46, Detroit, Michigan Man facing trial on charges of attacking fiancee with chainsaw, dragging her through fire A Detroit-area man is facing trial on charges that he attacked his fiancee with a chainsaw and dragged her through a campfire at his cabin in Clare County this summer. Robert Presley Jr., 46, is accused of attacking the 38-year-old woman from Madison Heights on his property June 6 in Clare County's village of Temple. On Friday, a judge ruled there was enough evidence for Presley Jr.'s case to move to trial on all 14 felony charges filed against him. He faces up to life in prison if convicted of the most serious charges. Authorities say on June 6 a domestic fight broke out between Presley and the woman. He allegedly cut her with a chainsaw, dragged her through a campfire and struck her with his hands or feet before she was able to escape. The woman walked to the roadway, where a passing motorist picked her up and brought her to an ambulance station nearby. She was transported to Munson Healthcare Cadillac Hospital, where she was being treated for serious injuries. After the woman escaped, Presley allegedly drove himself to the Clare County Sheriff's Office to file a report about her assaulting him. Police say he was intoxicated when he showed up and had nine guns in plain sight in his vehicle. Presley was arrested on charges including assault with intent to murder, torture, possession of ammunition as a convicted felon, drunken driving second offense and habitual offender third offense enhancement. He also faces nine counts of carrying a firearm as a convicted felon. From: Bill Re: Ease US Dear Webby. On trying to run my backup program, "Ease US version11.5", I get a message that there are errors on partition C:\. I have spent hours researching this problem. I have run CHKDSK and other suggestions. I did not download any "fixer" programs. Otherwise, my new 1Tb SDD with Windows 10 seems to be working well. Do you have any suggestions or recommend a program that will get rid of the errors on partition C? Thanks. Bill Hi Bill I have never heard of Ease US. If chkdsk says the disk is OK, I would trust that. Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn't been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room and comes back with three different bottles of pills. The doctor says, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water." Startled to be put on so much medicine the man stammers, "Jeez doc, exactly what's my problem?" Doctor says, "You're not drinking enough water." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Things are not always the way they may appear. For example, a woman's dog got out of the yard and later returned with a rabbit in its mouth. She realized it was the neighbors' pet rabbit, and knew she would never be able to tell them what happened. Since they were out of town, she hit upon a plan. She took the rabbit into the bathroom, washed it off, and blew its fur dry. Then she took the rabbit to the neighbors' backyard and put the rabbit back in its cage. She thought the neighbors would discover the rabbit dead and think it died in the cage, and would never suspect what really had happened. On Monday, there was a knock at the door, and when she answered, her neighbor was standing there. He asked her if she had seen anyone in their backyard over the weekend. She said no. He said, "Did you see anything strange going on around our house or yard?" Again, she denied seeing anything suspicious. She said, "Why are you asking me these questions? What happened?" He said, "Well, something really strange is going on in my backyard. On Friday our rabbit died, so we buried it in the backyard. But when we came back from the weekend, it was back in the cage!" ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Decorations Your Children Can Make Here are some decorations your kids can make. Paint macaroni and string it together to wrap around your tree. Have them cut out snowflakes from white paper to decorate your walls. Or have kids string together popcorn and cranberries. Balls made from crumpled aluminum foil and splattered with water colors also look quite classy. For splattering, use a toothbrush, not a paintbrush, and rub it over the backside of a sieve. With a little bit of practice, it puts a fine and even spray onto whatever is about a foot below the sieve. Candy- apple red and electric blue dots look great. Best done in the shower or sink. DearWebby Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ >From Ella My daughter's fifth grade class had been studying astronomy. One morning over breakfast she announced, "On Friday we're having a quiz on the moon." At once her little brother's eyes got big and he asked, "Are you gonna let her go, Mom?" ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
>From Ed I have a reputation at work for being a strict boss. One day I was in the break room with another manager. I reached into the refrigerator for my lunch, which was packed in an Ace Hardware paper bag. My co-worker stopped mid-bite and stared at me, looking a little tense. When I pulled my sandwich out of the bag, he sighed in relief. "What's the matter?" I asked him. "Uh, nothing," he replied, "I was beginning to think you really do eat nails for lunch." | Today November 3 in 1507 Leonardo DaVinci was commissioned by the husband of Lisa Gherardini to paint her. The work is known as the Mona Lisa. 1631 The Reverend John Eliot arrived in the Massachusetts Bay Colony. He was the first Protestant minister to dedicate himself to the conversion of Native Americans to Christianity. 1793 Stephen F. Austin was born. He was the principal founder of Texas. 1839 The first Opium War between China and Britain erupted. 1892 The first automatic telephone went into service at LaPorte, IN. The device was invented by Almon Strowger. 1900 The first automobile show in the United States opened at New York's Madison Square Garden. 1903 Panama proclaimed its independence from Colombia. 1911 Chevrolet Motor Car Company was founded by Louis Chevrolet and William C. Durant. 1934 The first race track in California opened under a new pari- mutuel betting law. 1941 U.S. Ambassador to Japan John Grew warned that the Japanese may be planning a sudden attack on the U.S. 1952 Frozen bread was offered for sale for the first time in a supermarket in Chester, NY. 1957 Sputnik II was launched by the Soviet Union. It was the second manmade satellite to be put into orbit and was the first to put an animal into space, a dog named Laika. 1973 The U.S. launched the Mariner 10 spacecraft. On March 29, 1974 it became the first spacecraft to reach the planet Mercury. 1979 Five members of the Communist Workers' Party are shot to death in broad daylight at an anti-Ku Klux Klan rally in Greensboro, NC. Eight others were wounded. 1986 The Ash-Shiraa, pro-Syrian Lebanese magazine, first broke the story of U.S. arms sales to Iran to secure the release of seven American hostages. The story turned into the Iran-Contra affair. 1987 China told the U.S. that it would halt the sale of arms to Iran. 1991 Israeli and Palestinian representatives held their first- ever face-to-face talks in Madrid, Spain. 1994 Susan Smith of Union, SC, was arrested for drowning her two sons. Nine days earlier Smith had claimed that the children had been abducted by a black carjacker. 1995 U.S. President Clinton dedicated a memorial at Arlington National Cemetery to the 270 victims of the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103. 1998 Bob Kane, the creator of Batman, died at the age of 83. 1998 A state-run newspaper in Iraq urged the country to prepare for to battle "the U.S. monster." 1998 Minnesota elected Jesse "The Body" Ventura, a former pro wrestler, as its governor. 2002 At Kai Tak Airport in Hong Kong, 777 people assembled a 58,435 square foot jigsaw puzzle with 21,600 pieces. 2003 In Kabul, Afghanistan, a post-Taliban draft constitution was unveiled. 2005 Walt Disney Pictures released "Chicken Little." It was the first Disney film completely created with computer animation. 2014 In New York City, One World Trade Center opened for business. 2018 Do smiled. |
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