Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, April 25 ______________________________________________________ Today, April 25 in 1684 A patent was granted for the thimble. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Today's Bonehead Award: Florida Man's Homemade Pipe Bomb Sails Into Neighbor's Yard ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it. --- Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964) _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?" "I think so," the man replied. "My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for all of our guests." "I don't mean that," the priest responded. "I mean, are you prepared spiritually?" "Oh, sure," came the reply. "I've got a keg of beer and a case of whiskey." ______________________________________________________` _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Christopher Green, 25, Orange City Floriduh Florida Man's Homemade Pipe Bomb Sails Into Neighbor's Yard A man in Volusia County, Florida is facing charges after deputies say he ignited a homemade pipe bomb in his back yard that rocketed into his neighbor's yard and a video of the incident was posted on his Facebook account. Man charged after homemade pipe bomb flies into neighbor's yard Christopher Green admitted that he makes smoke bombs, deputies said Green posted $10,000 bail and was released from Volusia jail Christopher Green, 25, of Orange City was charged Saturday with making a destructive device. According to deputies, a woman working in her back yard at her home on Liskeard Avenue that afternoon heard a loud hissing noise and saw white smoke as an object flew into her yard. Upon examination, it appeared to be a metal pipe that had been capped at both ends. No one was injured in the incident, though it forced the evacuation of several nearby homes. A Volusia County bomb squad was called in, whose investigation led to a home on Montrose Avenue. There, they made contact with Green, who they said admitted he used stump remover mixed with sugar to make smoke bombs. Deputies also said they found a video of the incident on Green's Facebook page. The video, they said, depicted Green making a pasty substance in a pot on a kitchen stove, then going outside and lighting a pipe with the substance in it. After a few seconds, the pipe rocketed away. Green was taken to the Volusia County Branch Jail, where he posted $10,000 bail and was released. From: Brian Re: Yahoo mail problems Dear Webby It just happened recently. The page I received is blank, except for the ads on the left column. Please tell me how to fix it and continue to enjoy The everyday fun. Thank you, Brian. NB: When I reply to you, on this screen just beneath, I can see the jokes. It's blank when I open my inbox ! Dear Brian That's normal with the new Yahoo mail, and there is nothing I can do about their screw-up. Once you get gmail or any of the properly working email services, that problem will disappear. Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
A preacher retired and moved to the country to enjoy life and practice his hobby of yard work. Needing a lawn mower, he headed into town to buy one. On the way he saw a sign advertising a lawn mower for sale. He stopped at the house and a young lad came out to greet him. The preacher asked about the lawn mower and the kid said it was behind the house. The two went to look at the lawn mower. The engine was sputtering along at idle speed. The preacher increased the speed of the engine and mowed a few strips. Satisfied that the mower would do the job they settled on a price of $25.00. Later in the day, the young lad was riding his bicycle when he spied the preacher pulling on the engine starter rope. The kid stopped and watched for a couple of minutes. He asked, "What's wrong?" The reply came, "I can't get this mower started. Do you know how?" The kid said, "Yep." "Well, how do you do it? Tell me!", the preacher yelled. The kid replied, "You have to cuss it." The preacher rose up indignantly. "Now you listen here. I am a preacher and if I ever did cuss, not saying I have, I've forgotten how to do it after all these years." With a wise look on his face well beyond his years, the kid said, "Preacher, you keep on pulling that rope and it'll all come back to ya." ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Crockpot for Summer Cooking The summer is a great time to dust off your slow cooker and put it use. Crockpots work well for a variety of recipes: soup, stew, spaghetti, roasts, and more. Just search on your favorite website for crockpot recipes. If heat is a problem, just use it outside or in the garage. thriftyfun.Com on a hot, sunny day you can put a crock pot into a barbecue. Not lit, just warmed by the sun! If it is sheltered from the wind, it will get more than hot enough just from the sun. You may have to use small wedge to keep the lid from closing all the way. For windy locations you can throw some bubble-wrap over it. It won't melt, but it will increase the temperature inside the barbecue quite drastically. A barbecue on solar power also works well for slow brewing tea for ice tea. For best results use a wide 3 or 4 quart pyrex pot with a lid. Have FUN! DearWebby ____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Thanks to Lynn for this: I saw an ad in the newspaper advertising a bathing suit that would subtract thirty pounds. I figure if I order two of them I'll be just about beach ready! ___________________________________________________ Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is." ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering?" A 90 year old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding cake." ___________________________________________________ | Today April 25 in 1590 The Sultan of Morocco launched his successful attack to capture Timbuktu. 1644 The Ming Chongzhen emperor committed suicide by hanging himself. 1684 A patent was granted for the thimble. 1707 At the Battle of Almansa, Franco-Spanish forces defeated the Anglo-Portugese. 1792 The guillotine was first used to execute highwayman Nicolas J. Pelletier. 1831 The New York and Harlem Railway was incorporated in New York City. 1846 The Mexican-American War ignited as a result of disputes over claims to Texas boundaries. The outcome of the war fixed Texas' southern boundary at the Rio Grande River. 1859 Work began on the Suez Canal in Egypt. 1860 The first Japanese diplomats to visit a foreign power reached Washington, DC. They remained in the U.S. capital for several weeks while discussing expansion of trade with the United States. 1862 Union Admiral Farragut occupied New Orleans, LA. 1864 After facing defeat in the Red River Campaign, Union General Nathaniel Bank returned to Alexandria, LA. 1867 Tokyo was opened for foreign trade. 1882 French commander Henri Riviere seized the citadel of Hanoi in Indochina. 1898 The U.S. declared war on Spain. Spain had declared war on the U.S. the day before. 1901 New York became the first state to require license plates for cars. The fee was $1. 1915 During World War I, Australian and New Zealand troops landed at Gallipoli in Turkey in hopes of attacking the Central Powers from below. The attack was unsuccessful. 1925 General Paul von Hindenburg took office as president of Germany. 1926 In Iran, Reza Kahn was crowned Shah and choose the name "Pehlevi." 1928 A seeing eye dog was used for the first time. 1945 U.S. and Soviet forces met at Torgau, Germany on Elbe River. 1945 Delegates from about 50 countries met in San Francisco to organize the United Nations. 1952 After a three-day fight against Chinese Communist Forces, the Gloucestershire Regiment was annihilated on "Gloucester Hill," in Korea. 1953 U.S. Senator Wayne Morse ended the longest speech in U.S. Senate history. The speech on the Offshore Oil Bill lasted 22 hours and 26 minutes. 1953 Dr. James D. Watson and Dr. Francis H.C. Crick suggested the double helix structure of DNA. 1954 The prototype manufacture of the first solar battery was announced by the Bell Laboratories in New York City. 1957 Operations began at the first experimental sodium nuclear reactor. 1959 St. Lawrence Seaway opened to shipping. The water way connects the Great Lakes and the Atlantic Ocean. 1961 Robert Noyce was granted a patent for the integrated circuit. 1962 The U.S. spacecraft, Ranger, crashed on the Moon. 1967 Colorado Governor John Love signed the first law legalizing abortion in the U.S. The law was limited to therapeutic abortions when agreed to, unanimously, by a panel of three physicians. 1971 The country of Bangladesh was established. 1974 Portuguese dictator Antonio Salazar was overthrown in a military coup. 1976 Portugal ratified a constitution. It was first revised on October 30, 1982. 1980 In Iran, a commando mission to rescue hostages was aborted after mechanical problems disabled three of the eight helicopters involved. During the evacuation, a helicopter and a transport plane collided and exploded. Eight U.S. servicemen were killed. The mission was aimed at freeing American hostages that had been taken at the U.S. embassy in Tehran on November 4, 1979. The event took place April 24th Washington, DC, time. 1982 In accordance with Camp David agreements, Israel completed its Sinai withdrawal. 1983 Soviet leader Yuri V. Andropov invited Samantha Smith to visit his country after receiving a letter in which the U.S. schoolgirl expressed fears about nuclear war. 1983 The Pioneer 10 spacecraft crossed Pluto's orbit, speeding on its endless voyage through the Milky Way. 1984 In France, over one million people demonstrated to show they favored the decentralization of education. 1984 David Anthony Kennedy, the son of Robert F. Kennedy, was found dead of a drug overdose in a hotel room. 1985 "Big River (The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn)" opened at the Eugene O?eill Theatre on Broadway in New York City. 1987 In Washington, DC, 100,000 people protested the U.S. policy in Central America. 1988 In Israel, John "Ivan the Terrible" Demjanuk was sentenced to death as a Nazi war criminal. 1990 Sandinista rule ended in Nicaragua. 1990 The U.S. Hubble Space Telescope was placed into Earth's orbit. It was released by the space shuttle Discovery. 1992 Islamic forces in Afghanistan took control of most of the capital of Kabul following the collapse of the Communist government. 1996 The main assembly of the Palestine Liberation Organization voted to revoke clauses in its charter that called for an armed struggle to destroy Israel. 1998 U.S. first lady Hillary Rodham Clinton was questioned by Whitewater prosecutors on videotape about her work as a private lawyer for the failed savings and loan at the center of the investigation. 2003 Winnie Madikizela-Mandela, the anti-apartheid leader and ex-wife of former President Nelson Mandela, was sentenced to four years in prison for her conviction on fraud and theft charges. She was convicted of 43 counts of fraud and 25 of theft of money from a women's political league. 2019 Do smiled. |
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