Good Morning, Do, Today is Tuesday, October 24 Have Fun! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Indicted Cleveland police officer slipped ankle monitor, escaped Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, Oct 24 in 1648 The Holy Roman Empire was effectively destroyed by the Peace of Westphalia that brought an end to the Thirty Years War. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ Nobody believes the official spokesman... but everybody trusts an unidentified source. --- Ron Nesen "I don't believe there's any problem in this country, no matter how tough it is, that Americans, when they roll up their sleeves, can't completely ignore." --- George Carlin Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. --- Dave Barry On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time. --- George Orwell ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of my home state, Kansas, to the wedding. My fiancee, explaining this to a friend, said that we were planning to have wheat rather than rice thrown after the ceremony. Our friend thought for a moment. Then he said solemnly, "It's a good thing she's not from Idaho." _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Allen for this story: My mom has a lead foot, so I was not surprised when a state trooper pulled us over as we were driving through Georgia. Hoping to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shocked when he walked up to the car. "I have never been stopped like this before," she said to the officer. "What do they usually do, ma'am," he asked, "shoot the tires out?" ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Tommie Griffin, 51, Cleveland, Ohio Indicted Cleveland police officer slipped ankle monitor, escaped Authorities are actively looking for indicted Cleveland police officer Tommie Griffin. U.S. Marshal Pete Elliott confirms to Fox 8 that Tommie Griffin broke his ankle monitoring bracelet, and is on the run. Griffin was arrested back in January on charges related to the alleged beating and sexual assault of a 42 year-old woman in Parma. At the time, his bond was set at $250,000. Griffin, who is in his early 50's, is a patrol officer with the Cleveland Division of Police. He was hired back in 1994. He was suspended without pay after his arrest, pending the outcome of the criminal case against him. Griffin initially faced charges that included felonious assault, kidnapping and rape for the alleged attack. Back in January, Capt. Kevin Riley of the Parma Police Department said Griffin was accused of pistol-whipping the woman and pointing a gun at her. Parma police also said Griffin allegedly fired two shots while holding the gun next to the woman, who police said was sexually assaulted during the attack. An escape warrant has been issued for Griffin. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Gary Re: Start-Up programs Dear Webby, I hope you can help me with this problem I'm having trying to get rid of startup things..I go to msconfig then start up then uncheck the things that I want not to start up..and then I shut down as instructed..but beholed all is back at start up... all are checked again..it's driving me to drink..not a bad drive..but that's another story.. Thank you in advance for your expert help..... Gary Dear Gary Use Spybot-Search&Destroy! It is on the side menu about half way down. In it's TOOLS, look for System StartUp and take checkmarks off anything you don't like. It shows you good descriptions of each item. Here is an example: ==================== Current filename: "C:\Program Files\QuickTime\qttask.exe" - atboottime Database status: Not required - virus, spyware, malware or other resource hog Value: QuickTime Task Filename: qttasks.exe Description _CoolWebSearch_ parasite variant ==================== Just take the checkmark off stuff like that, and exit. Next time you reboot, that item will be ignored and won't be loaded. If you ever need that resource hogging parasite again, simply put the checkmark back onto that item. As an added bonus, Item that were added since the last time you changed any settings, are shown in BOLD, to alert you to them. I couldn't really ask for anything simpler and more straight forward than that. And it's FREE! Just click on the button for it on the right side of the Humor Letter. Have FUN! DearWebby If you tell the Navy to secure a building, they will turn out the lights and lock the door. If you tell the Army to secure a building, they will occupy it and forbid entry to those without a pass. If you tell the Marines to secure a building, they assault with heavy fire, capture the building, fortify it and call for an air strike. If you tell the Air Force to secure a building, they will negotiate a three year lease with an option to buy. If you tell the Congress to secure a building, they will form two separate commissions to study which security contractors will provide the best bribe packages, ahem incentives. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com >Borax and Cornmeal for Drying Flowers You can dry flowers in about 10 days using Borax and Cornmeal. This requires 2 parts borax to 1 part white cornmeal. First, cover the bottom a tub with a thin layer of this powder. Then place your flowers on top of this layer. Slow add more of the powder until the flowers are covered. It's best to not pour the mixture directly on the flowers (it may squish them), but off to the side, letting it cover the flowers as the tub fills up. Once the flowers are covered, let them sit for 10 days. Sand can be substituted for the borax but it takes 16 days for the flowers to dry if you use sand. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ From Bobbie: On vacation this year I went to a resort in Wyoming. As part of the usual activities, a neighboring ranch invited guests from our resort to participate in a cattle drive. After watching 20 make-believe cowpokes whooping and hollering, I rode up to the ranchowner and asked her how many cowboys it normally takes to drive a herd of that size. "One," she replied, "and a dog." __________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ As the family gathered for a big dinner together, the youngest son announced that he had just signed up at an army recruiter's office. There were audible gasps around the table, then some laughter, as his older brothers shared their disbelief that he could handle this new situation. "Oh, come on, quit joking," snickered one. "You didn't really do that, did you?" "You would never get through basic training," scoffed another. The new recruit looked to his mother for help, but she was just gazing at him. When she finally spoke, she simply asked, "YOU ? Making your own bed every morning?" | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
Somewhat skeptical of his son's newfound determination to become Charles Atlas, the father nevertheless followed the teenager over to the weight-lifting department, admiring a set of weights. "Please, Dad," pleaded the boy, "I promise I'll use 'em every day." "I don't know, Michael. It's really a commitment on your part," the father pointed out. "Please, Dad?" the boy continued. "They're not cheap either," the father came back. "I'll use 'em Dad, I promise. You'll see." Finally won over, the father paid for the equipment and headed for the door. From the corner of the store he heard his son yelp, "What! You mean I have to carry them to the car?" ____________________________________________________ | Today, October 24, in 1648 The Holy Roman Empire was effectively destroyed by the Peace of Westphalia that brought an end to the Thirty Years War. 1795 The country of Poland was divided up between Austria, Prussia, and Russia. 1836 Alonzo D. Phillips received a patent for the phosphorous friction safety match. 1861 The first transcontinental telegraph message was sent when Justice Stephen J. Field of California transmitted a telegram to U.S. President Lincoln. 1901 Daredevil Anna Edson Taylor became the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. She was 63 years old. 1929 In the U.S., investors dumped more than 13 million shares on the stock market. The day is known as "Black Tuesday." 1931 The upper level of the George Washington Bridge opened for traffic between New York and New Jersey. 1939 Nylon stockings were sold to the public for the first time in Wilmington, DE. 1940 In the U.S., the 40-hour workweek went into effect under the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938. 1945 The United Nations (UN) was formally established less than a month after the end of World War II. 1948 The term "cold war" was used for the first time. It was in a speech by Bernard Baruch before the Senate War Investigating Committee. 1960 All remaining American-owned property in Cuba was nationalized. The process of nationalizing all U.S. and foreign-owned property in Cuba had begun on August 6, 1960. 1962 During the Cuban Missile Crisis, U.S. military forces went on the highest alert in the postwar era in preparation for a possible full-scale war with the Soviet Union. The U.S. blockade of Cuba officially began on this day. 1969 Richard Burton bought his wife Elizabeth Taylor a 69- carat Cartier diamond ring for $1.5 million. Burton presented the ring to Taylor several days later. 1986 Britain broke off relations with Syria after a Jordanian was convicted in an attempted bombing. The evidence in the trial led to the belief that Syria was involved in the attack on the Israeli jetliner. 1992 The Toronto Blue Jays became the first non-U.S. team to win the World Series. 2001 The U.S. House of Representatives approved legislation that gave police the power to secretly search homes, tap all of a person's telephone conversation and track people's use of the Internet. 2001 The U.S. stamp "United We Stand" was dedicated. 2001 NASA's 2001 Mars Odyssey spacecraft successfully entered orbit around Mars. 2002 Microsoft Corp. and Walt Disney Co. announced the release of an upgraded MSN Internet service with Disney content. 2003 In London, the last commercial supersonic Concorde flight landed. 2017 Do smiled. |
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