Good Morning, Do, Today is Friday, July 15 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! Thank you, Elizabeth! Have FUN! DearWebby With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
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Todays Bonehead Award: MA Bonehead tried to rob bank, left empty handed and hit a police car while trying to get away. He continued driving, but struck a utility pole. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, July 15, in 1099 Jerusalem fell to the Crusaders. More of what happened on this day in history. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | | |
______________________________________________________ Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. --- Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980) Most advances in science come when a person for one reason or another is forced to change fields. --- Peter Borden ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Leonardo's Pizza in Akron, Ohio narrowly escaped being robbed because the gunman slipped on a patch of grease from a pizza that had been dropped on the floor earlier. He hit the floor and knocked himself unconscious. The armed robber is planning to sue Leonardo's Pizza. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | | |
One caller to an answering service gave me his name, number and message and then said, "You know my name. What's yours?" "We're not allowed to give our names," the rep replied, "but my operator number is 4136" Sounding disappointed, the caller said, "May I call you by your first digit, or would that be too personal?" -------------------------------- Personally, when they act like that I ask them for the name of their competitor. ______________________________________________________ This is the absolute funniest spam I have received in a long time: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Important notice We have just charged your credit card for money laundry service in amount of $234.65 (because you are either child pronography webmaster or deal with dirty money, which require us to layndry them and then send to your checking account). If you feel this transaction was made by our mistake, please press "No". If you confirm this transaction, please press "Yes" and fill in the form below. Enter your name here: Enter your credit card number here: Enter your credit card expiration date: Enter the number from the back: Yes No Contacts: Phone: +5982 902 5627 Fax: +5982 902 3114 E-mail: [email protected] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I do NOT recommend calling those numbers. They are in zone 5, South/Latin America and most likely similar to our 1 9xx numbers, but at $25 and up per minute. The whole thing is so silly that it probably falls half way between "Moron-Tax" and making fun of the scammers who ask you to send them your Paypal and credit card info. ______________________________________________________ Johnston Canyon ______________________________________________________ If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Sean P. Smith 43, Idaho Falls, Idaho Transgender woman arrested for videotaping 18-year-old in Target fitting room A transgender woman accused of videotaping an 18-year-old in a Target fitting room admitted to detectives that she had made videos in the past of women undressing, according to court documents obtained by EastIdahoNews.com. Shauna Smith, a transgender woman, is being charged as Sean Smith with one felony count of video voyeurism after the alleged incident Monday. An affidavit of probable cause states the 18-year-old woman was trying on swimwear at the Target on 25th East when someone in an adjacent fitting room held an iPhone over the top of the barrier and began taking photos or video recording. The victims mother confronted the suspect, who immediately fled on foot. Both the victim and victims mother described the suspect as a white male who was wearing a dress and a blonde wig. A witness observed the suspect get into a vehicle and leave the area, court documents state. Bonneville County detectives learned the vehicle was registered to Smith. When an investigator arrived at Smiths home, documents state the defendants roommate told (the investigator) her roommate is a transgender male who identifies as a female, Shauna Smith. The detective showed the roommate surveillance still photos of the suspect from Target and the roommate identified the suspects clothing as that of Smiths, according to documents. Deputies interviewed Smith and the defendant eventually admitted to me that she had made videos in the past of women undressing. The defendant told (the detective) that she makes these videos for the same reason men go online to look at pornography,' documents state. According to the affidavit, Smith told the detective she finds the video sexually gratifying and when the deputy looked at the camera roll on Smiths iPhone, he observed a video of a young adult female undressing in a changing room at what appear to be Target. The defendant admitted to me that this video was recorded at Target. Smith is scheduled to be arraigned this afternoon in Bonneville County and was booked as a male into the Bonneville County Jail on a $30,000 bond. The Target boycott petition, launched by the American Family Association, currently has over 1.3 million signatures. The AFA petition puts Target's policies in stark terms, noting that they allow a man to "simply say he 'feels like a woman today' and enter the women's restroom...even if young girls or women are already in there." ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Cay RE: Wacky font in Gmail Dear Webby, I hate to be a pest, but for several weeks, the print in the newsletter I receive has reverted to "typewriter" font instead of the usual. this seems to happen two or three times a year. Can it be fixed? Be safe and healthy, Cay, Dear Cay That seems to be a setting in your Gmail. I subscribed with a gmail address so that I can check how it looks on Gmail. It COULD be that your computer is low on available RAM. Run CrapCleaner and see if that helps. If it doesn't, mess around with the settings in your Gmail. You can always browse top http://webby.com and see what I sent out to you. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ A couple were in line at a theme park when they noticed two teenagers in front of them, passionately hugging and kissing. They didn't even come up for air when the line moved. As they waited, their displays of affection became more and more embarrassing. Finally a park employee approached them and said, "Hey, you two! This is a place to BRING your families, not CAUSE them." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organic Coconut Oil Chocolates Approximate Time: 1 hour Yield: 24 or more Ingredients: 1 cup organic virgin coconut oil 1/2 cup organic cacao powder 1/4 cup pure maple syrup Steps: Place all ingredients in a stand mixer and blend until smooth (stopping a couple times to scrape down the sides). Using a tablespoon, measure chocolate mixture and drop on baking sheets lined with parchment paper. Freeze for 1-2 hours. Remove and enjoy. Keep these chocolates in an air-tight container in your freezer. Option: add a couple drops of mint extract to give these chocolates a minty flavor. It is really important that the ingredients of the maple syrup are JUST maple syrup, and no Corn Syrup or modified corn syrup, unless you need to fatten up. You can soak a small handful of raisins in a bit of brandy or rum, and add them after drip-drying them a minute. They not only enhance the flavor but add an occasional surprising texture treat. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
_____________________________________________________ Two little girls are looking at a book of fairy tales. "Who's that on the cover?" asks the younger of the two. "That's Cinderella." replied her friend. "It's a nice story with a happy ending." "But why is she crying?" the first asked. "She doesn't look so happy to me." "Because her wicked step-Mother won't let her go to the mall." answered the second. ___________________________________________________ | baby trains "Rocky" style |
____________________________________________________ Gillian Shephard, a Member of Parliament, paid a visit to Norwich jail to inspect the place and after her tour of the prison, she was shown to her chauffeur driven car by the Governor, whereupon it was discovered that the chauffeur had inadvertently left the keys in the car and he was unable to open the doors. There was much embarrassment until the Governor of Norwich jail came up with a splendid idea. "We have plenty inside here who are doing time for car burglary; shall I get one?" Gillian nodded her assent. Enter Justin, doing a few years for such crimes, and he was invited to display his skills to the advantage of Mrs. Shephard in order to save her any further embarrassment. With that, Justin picked up a large stone and hurled it at the window of the limousine, shattering it in a million pieces. Surrounding press and camera men had to hide behind trees and other cover to conceal their mirth. By way of explanation he later said that all he was ever after was the property inside the vehicles. ____________________________________________________ One day at kindergarten, the teacher says to the to the class of five-year-olds, "I'll give $2 to the child who can tell me who the most famous man who ever lived was." An Irish boy raised his hand and said, "Please, Miss, it was St. Patrick." The teacher said, "Sorry, Sean, that's not correct." Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, "Please, Miss, it was St. Andrew." The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either." Finally, a Jewish boy, Aaron, raised his hand and said, "Please, Miss, it was Jesus Christ." The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Aaron. Come up here, and I'll give you your $2." As the teacher was giving Aaron his money, she said, "You know, Aaron, you being Jewish, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ." "I know, Miss," Aaron replied, "in my heart I know it was Moses, but business is business." ____________________________________________________ | Today on July 15 1099 Jerusalem fell to the Crusaders. 1410 Poles and Lithuanians defeated the Teutonic knights at Tannenburg, Prussia. 1789 The electors of Paris set up a "Commune" to live without the authority of the government. 1806 Lieutenant Zebulon Pike began his western expedition from Fort Belle Fountaine, near St. Louis, MO. 1813 Napoleon Bonaparte's representatives met with the Allies in Prague to discuss peace terms. 1885 In New York, the Niagara Reservation State Park opened. 1888 "Printers Ink" was first sold. 1895 Ex-prime minister of Bulgaria, Stephen Stambulov, was murdered by Macedonian rebels. 1901 Over 74,000 Pittsburgh steel workers went on strike. 1904 The first Buddhist temple in the U.S. was established in Los Angeles, CA. 1916 In Seattle, WA, Pacific Aero Products was incorporated by William Boeing. The company was later renamed Boeing Co. 1918 The Second Battle of the Marne began during World War I. 1922 The duck-billed platypus arrived in America, direct from Australia. It was exhibited at the Bronx Zoo in New York City. 1942 The first supply flight from India to China over the 'Hump' was carried to help China's war effort. 1958 Five thousand U.S. Marines landed in Beirut, Lebanon, to protect the pro-Western government. The troops withdrew October 25, 1958. 1965 The spacecraft Mariner IV sent back the first close- up pictures of the planet Mars. 1968 Commercial air travel began between the U.S. and the U.S.S.R., when the first plane, a Soviet Aeroflot jet, landed at Kennedy International Airport in New York. 1971 U.S. President Nixon announced he would visit the People's Republic of China to seek a "normalization of relations." 1972 NASA's Pioneer 10 spacecraft became the first to enter the asteroid belt. 1987 Taiwan ended thirty-seven years of martial law. 2006 The social networking service Twitter was launched. 2009 "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" was released in theaters in the U.S. It was the sixth movie in the series. 2011 "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2" was released in theaters in the U.S. and U.K. It was the final film in the Harry Potter series. 2016 Do smiled. |
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