Good Morning, Do! Today is Sunday, June 28 ___________________________________________________ Today, June 28 in 1914 Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria, the heir to the Austro-Hungarian throne, was assassinated in Sarajevo along with his wife, Duchess Sophie. When Austria demanded that Serbia turn the assasins over to Austria, England started WWI. _____________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Jail deputy arrested for filing false sexual assault report ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
_____________________________________________________ Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter. --- William Ralph Inge (1860 - 1954) _____________________________________________________ A Chicago lawyer named George successfully defends a major crime lord from charges of dealing drugs, racketeering, murder, kidnapping, and selling arms. As he is leaving the courtroom, an indignant old woman grabs him by the arm. "Young man, where are your Christian scruples? I believe you would defend Satan himself!" "I don't know," George says, "what has your kid done now?" _____________________________________________________ Thanks to Tamara for this picture: Blue Footed Booby ___________________________________________________ A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anesthetic and had to gong him with the fire extinguisher." ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by LeAnn Schlicher, Wichita, Kansas, USA Jail deputy arrested for filing false sexual assault report A Sedgwick County detention deputy has been arrested for filing a false sexual assault report against a fellow jailer. Sheriff Jeff Easter said during a news conference that LeAnn Schlicher was arrested for felony interference with law enforcement. Schlicher allegedly reported the sexual assault on December 28, 2016. A criminal investigation was sent to the DA's office, but no charges were filed. Easter said a subsequent professional standards investigation led to both deputies being disciplined for policy violations not related to the sexual assault claim. Then early this year, Schlicher applied to be a commissioned deputy with the sheriff's office. Easter said part of the hiring process is an interview with a background investigator. "On June 23, 2020, a background investigator conducted the interview with the applying deputy," Easter said. "During the interview, the deputy admitted to filing a false police report to detectives about the December 2016 sexual assault report." Schlicher was arrested following a criminal investigation and relieved of her duties. Easter said she had been a detention deputy since 2016. DeaWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Richard Re: NOT for USA Utube downloader Webby you recommended the Link to Dave today and it says not allowed in the US due to copyright laws??? Richard Hi Richard Try one from here: Utube downloaders for USA Have FUN! DearWebby
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_____________________________________________ What are the three fastest means of communication? 1) Internet 2) Telephone 3) Telawoman! _____________________________________________ One of the world's greatest scientists was also recognized as the original absent-minded professor. One day, on board a train, he was unable to find his ticket. The conductor said, "Take it easy. You'll find it." When the conductor returned, the professor still couldn't find the ticket. The conductor, recognizing the famous scientist, said, "I'm sure you bought a ticket. Forget about it." "You're very kind," the professor said, "but I must find it, otherwise I won't know where to get off." ____________________________________________ As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please." Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck. As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off. The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big guy opens it and starts cursing and pummeling the dog. The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius? It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today June 28 in 1635 The French colony of Guadeloupe was established in the Caribbean. 1675 Frederick William of Brandenburg crushed the Swedes. 1709 The Russians defeated the Swedes and Cossacks at the Battle of Poltava. 1776 American Colonists repulsed a British sea attack on Charleston, SC. 1778 Mary "Molly Pitcher" Hays McCauley, wife of an American artilleryman, carried water to the soldiers during the Battle of Monmouth and, supposedly, took her husband's place at his gun after he was overcome with heat. 1902 The U.S. Congress passed the Spooner bill, it authorized a canal to be built across the isthmus of Panama. 1911 Samuel J. Battle became the first African-American policeman in New York City. 1914 Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria, the heir to the Austro-Hungarian throne, was assassinated in Sarajevo along with his wife, Duchess Sophie. When Austria demanded that the assasin be turned over to Austria, England started WWI. 1919 The Treaty of Versailles was signed ending World War I exactly five years after it began. The treaty also established the League of Nations. 1921 A coal strike in Great Britain was settled after three months. 1930 More than 1,000 communists were routed during an assault on the British consulate in London. 1939 Pan American Airways began the first transatlantic passenger service. 1942 German troops launched an offensive to seize Soviet oil fields in the Caucasus and the city of Stalingrad. 1945 U.S. General Douglas MacArthur announced the end of Japanese resistance in the Philippines. 1949 The last U.S. combat troops were called home from Korea, leaving only 500 advisers. 1950 North Korean forces captured Seoul, South Korea. 1954 French troops began to pull out of Vietnams Tonkin Province. 1960 In Cuba, Fidel Castro confiscated American-owned oil refineries without compensation. 1964 Malcolm X founded the Organization for Afro American Unity to seek independence for blacks in the Western Hemisphere. 1965 The first commercial satellite began communications service. It was Early Bird (Intelsat I). 1967 Israel formally declared Jerusalem reunified under its sovereignty following its capture of the Arab sector in the June 1967 war. 1971 The U.S. Supreme Court overturned the draft evasion conviction of Muhammad Ali. 1972 U.S. President Nixon announced that no new draftees would be sent to Vietnam. 1976 The first women entered the U.S. Air Force Academy. 1978 The U.S. Supreme Court ordered the medical school at the University of California at Davis to admit Allan Bakke. Bakke, a white man, argued he had been a victim of reverse racial discrimination. 1996 The Citadel voted to admit women, ending a 153-year- old men-only policy at the South Carolina military school. 1997 Mike Tyson was disqualified for biting Evander Holyfield's ear after three rounds of their WBA heavyweight title fight in Las Vegas, NV. 1998 Poland, due to shortage of funds, is allowed to lease, U.S. aircraft to bring military force up to NATO standards. 1998 The Cincinnati Enquirer apologized to Chiquita banana company and retracted their stories that questioned company's business practices. They also agreed to pay more than $10 million to settle legal claims. 2000 The U.S. Supreme Court declared that a Nebraska law that outlawed "partial birth abortions" was unconstitutional. About 30 U.S. states had similar laws at the time of the ruling. 2000 Six-year-old Elin Gonzlez returned to Cuba from the U.S. with his father. The child had been the center of an international custody dispute. 2001 Slobodan Milosevic was taken into custody and was handed over to the U.N. war crimes tribunal in The Hague, Netherlands. The indictment charged Milosevic and four other senior officials, with crimes against humanity and violations of the laws and customs of war in Kosovo. 2001 The U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit set aside an order that would break up Microsoft for antitrust violations. However, the judges did agree that the company was in violation of antitrust laws. 2004 The U.S. turned over official sovereignty to Iraq's interim leadership. The event took place two days earlier than previously announced to thwart insurgents' attempts at undermining the transfer. 2004 The U.S. resumed diplomatic ties with Libya after a 24-year break. 2004 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that enemy combatants could challenge their detention in U.S. Courts. 2007 The American bald eagle was removed from the endangered species list. 2010 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that Americans have the right to own a gun for self-defense anywhere they live. 2020 Do smiled. |
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