Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, December 9 ____________________________________________________ Today, December 9 in  1960 Sperry Rand Corporation unveiled a new computer known as "Univac 1107."  ______________________________________________________ 
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 Today's Bonehead Award: Pot Head" is wanted again  _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  _______________________________________________ A good relationship is like fireworks: loud, explosive, and liable to maim you if you hold on too long. --- Jeph Jacques _______________________________________________ "I never would have married you if I knew how stupid you were!" shouted the woman to her husband! The husband replied, "You should've known how stupid I am, the minute I asked you to marry me!" ________________________________________________`   Alfi Reda ____________________________________________________ 
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 ___________________________________________________  An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Douglas Perry Christopher, 51, Belpre, Ohio  Pot Head" is wanted again  The Week of the Forehead Tattoo continues with Ohio police asking for the public's help in the arrest of a 51-year-old ex- con/sex offender. The Washington County Sheriff's Office today announced they are seeking to apprehend Douglas Perry Christopher on a warrant charging him with failing to provide law enforcement officials with his current address. Christopher was convicted of sexual battery in 2010 and spent more than 3-1/2 years in state prison. Christopher is classified as a Tier III sex offender and is required to register with police every 90 days for the rest of his life. As seen above, Christopher is hard to miss considering the Pot Head tattoo on his forehead (not to mention those inked joint eyebrows and the marijuana leaf). Christopher was convicted on a felony narcotics possession charge for which he served more than two years in state prison. He was released on parole this summer. Christopher's last known address was in Belpre, a city along the Ohio River across from Parkersburg, West Virginia. 
 DearWebby's Tech Support Pits  From: Cindy Re: Uncluttered Favorites  Dear Webby The "favorites" in my browser are too difficult to organize and I want to make shortcuts to them in little clusters on the desktop. Thanks, Cindy  Dear Cindy Reduce your browser window so that the area, where you want to park the short-cut icons, is visible. Then go to a site, and drag the little icon in the left of the browser address bar onto that empty spot on the desktop. You can rename the icon text to something shorter and more memorable. Have FUN! DearWebby 
 Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. 
 Thanks to BillieBob in Bama: How can you tell Leroy is at a Cock fight? He's the one who brought the duck. How can you identify the Italian at the Cock fight? He's the one who bets on the duck. How can you tell if the Mafia is involved in the Cock fight? The duck wins. 
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 >From Myrna After a day full of accidents and mistakes, my coworker had had it. "Why," she cried out in exasperation, "do things that happen to stupid people keep happening to me?!" ___________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Caring For Leather Jackets Don't leave leather items in the back of your car on sunny days. Heat and sunlight can dry and bleach out the leather. Hairspray or perfume can damage the finish. If it gets wet, let it dry at room temperature. Store with room to breathe.  Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun ____________________________________________________  
  
 
Hula Hoop Dance
 ___________________________________________________ The teacher in an adult Sabbath class asked a woman to read about the Israelites wandering in the desert. "The Lord heard you when you wailed, 'If only we had meat to eat!'" she began. "Now the Lord will give you meat. You will not eat it for just one day, or two days, or five, or ten or twenty days, but for a month - until you loathe it." When the woman finished she paused, looked up and said, "Hey, isn't that the Atkins diet?" ___________________________________________________ During a bank robbery the police chief told the sergeant to cover all exits so the robbers could not get away. Later the sergeant reports to the chief. "Sorry Sir, but they got away." The chief very angry says, "I told you to cover all of the exits!" "I did," replied the sergeant, "but they got away through the entrance." ___________________________________________________ >From school: Why did your mom marry your dad? 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot. 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on. __________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, December 9 in 1625 The Treaty of the Hague was signed by England and the Netherlands. The agreement was to subsidize Christian IV of Denmark in his campaign in Germany. 1783 The first executions at Newgate Prison took place. 1793 "The American Minerva" was published for the first time. It was the first daily newspaper in New York City and was founded by Noah Webster. 1803 The 12th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was passed by the U.S. Congress. With the amendment Electors were directed to vote for a President and for a Vice-President rather than for two choices for President. 1854 Alfred Lord Tennyson's poem, "The Charge of the Light Brigade," was published in England. 1879 Thomas Edison organized the Edison Ore Milling Company. 1884 Levant M. Richardson received a patent for the ball- bearing roller skate. 1892 In London, "Widowers' Houses," George Bernard Shaw's first play, opened at the Royalty Theater. 1907 Christmas Seals went on sale for the first time, in the Wilmington, DE, post office. 1914 The Edison Phonograph Works was destroyed by fire. 1917 Turkish troops surrendered Jerusalem to British troops led by Viscount Allenby. 1940 During World War II, British troops opened their first major offensive in North Africa. 1940 The Longines Watch Company signed for the first FM radio advertising contract with experimental station W2XOR in New York City. 1941 China declared war on Japan, Germany and Italy. 1955 Sugar Ray Robinson knocked out Carl Olson and regained his world middleweight boxing title. 1958 In Indianapolis, IN, Robert H.W. Welch Jr. and 11 other men met to form the anti-Communist John Birch Society. 1960 Sperry Rand Corporation unveiled a new computer known as "Univac 1107." 1962 "Lawrence of Arabia" by David Lean had its world premiere in London. 1975 U.S. President Gerald R. Ford signed a $2.3 billion seasonal loan authorization to prevent New York City from having to default. 1985 In Argentina, five former military junta members received sentences in prison for their roles in the "dirty war" in which nearly 9,000 people had "disappeared." 1987 West Bank Palestinians launched an intifada (uprising) against Israeli occupation. 1987 In the Gaza Strip, an Israeli patrol attacked the Jabliya refugee camp. 1990 Lech Walesa won Poland's first direct presidential election in the country's history. 1990 Slobodan Milosovic was elected president in Serbia's first free elections in 50 years. 1990 The first American hostages to be released by Iran began arriving in the U.S. 1991 European Community leaders agreed to begin using a single currency in 1999. 1992 Britain's Prince Charles and Princess Diana announced their separation. 1992 Clair George, former CIA spy chief, was convicted of lying to the U.S. Congress about the Iran-Contra affair. U.S. President George H.W. Bush later pardoned George. 1992 U.S. troops arrived in Mogadishu, Somalia, to oversee delivery of international food aid, in operation 'Restore Hope'. 1993 The U.S. Air Force destroyed the first of 500 Minuteman II missile silos that were marked for elimination under an arms control treaty. 1993 Astronauts aboard the space shuttle Endeavor completed repairs to the Hubble Space Telescope. 1993 At Princeton University in New Jersey, scientists produced a controlled fusion reaction equivalent to 3 million watts. 1994 Representatives of the Irish Republican Army and the British government opened peace talks in Northern Ireland. 1996 UN Secretary General Boutros-Ghali approved a deal allowing Iraq to resume its exports of oil and easing the UN trade embargo imposed on Iraq in 1990. 1999 The U.S. announced that it was expelling a Russian diplomat that had been caught gathering information with an eavesdropping device at the U.S. State Department. 2002 United Airlines filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy after losing $4 billion in the previous two years. It was the sixth largest bankruptcy filing. 2003 In Australia, thieves broke into a home and stole two 300- year-old etchings by Rembrandt. The 4-by-4-inch etchings, a self-portait and a depiction of the artist's mother, were valued around $518,000. 2013 AMR Corporation and US Airways Group completed a merger and was listed on the NASDAQ as American Airlines Group, Inc. 2019 Do smiled. 
 

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