| Good Morning, Do! Today is Fiday, June 30 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! ____________________________________________________ History: today, June 30 in 1958, The U.S. Congress passed a law authorizing the admission of Alaska as the 49th state in the Union. ___________________________________________ Bonehead Florida ex student breaks into teachers home, found in her bed ___________________________________________________ Q It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time. --- Tallulah Bankhead (1903 - 1968) Few people think more than two or three times a year; I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once or twice a week. --- George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950) Bloom where you are planted. --- Socratex "Nature magically suits a man to his fortunes, by making them the fruit of his character." --- Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882) ___________________________________________________ Thanks to Dr. Connie for this report: What doctors say, and what they're really thinking: "This should be taken care of right away." I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month, but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself. "Welllllll, what have we here...?" He has no idea and is hoping you'll give him a clue. "Let me check your medical history." I want to see if you've paid your last bill before spending any more time with you. "Why don't we make another appointment later in the week." I'm playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time. --or-- I need the bucks, so I'm charging you for another office visit. "We have some good news and some bad news." The good news is, I'm going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you're going to pay for it. "Let's see how it develops." Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that I can prescribe something for. "Let me schedule you for some tests." I have a forty percent interest in the lab. "I'd like to prescribe a new drug." I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig. "If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call." I don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself. "That's quite a nasty looking wound." I think I'm going to throw up. "This may smart a little." Last week two patients bit off their tongues. "Well, we're not feeling so well today, are we...?" I'm stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here? "This should fix you up." The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff. "Everything seems to be normal." Rats! I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all. "I'd like to run some more tests." I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one. "There is a lot of that going around." That's the third one this week! I'd better learn something about this. "If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment." I've never heard of anything so disgusting. Thankfully I'm off next week. ____________________________________________________ Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries. Boy: It's very kind of you, darling. But I don't have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet. _____________________________________________________ Thanks to Dianne for this story: We got lucky when we heard the old Piedmont Hotel in Atlanta was getting a face-lift and its beautiful maple doors became available for sale as salvage items. We bought several and had them installed in our 19th-century home. Showing a friend around the house, I pointed out, "You know, these doors are from the Piedmont Hotel." He raised an eyebrow. "Most people just take the towels." ___________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Morris, a professional photographer was invited to dinner at the Goldblums. He took along a few pictures to show the hostess. Millie Goldblum looked at his photos and commented, "These are very good! You must have a very good camera." He didn't make any comment, however, as he was leaving to go home he said, "That was a really delicious meal, Millie!" "Thank you!" she replied enthusiastically. Then Morris added, "You must have a very good stove!" ________________________________________________ A Bonehead award has been reported by Rock Stephen Castillo, 46, DELRAY BEACH, Florida, USA Florida ex student breaks into teachers home, found in her bed A fitness instructor who works at Florida Atlantic University was shocked to find her ex-student in her bed Saturday in her home in the upscale community of The Bridges off Lyons Road in Delray Beach. The Palm Beach County Sheriffs Office tells BocaNewsNow.com that Stephen Castillo was found lying in the (teachers) bed, under the covers, when she arrived home around noon. Castillo had apparently just arrived at an area airport, took an Uber to the front gate of The Bridges, and walked right in. It was unclear how he gained access to the womans house. The woman called the Palm Beach County Sheriffs Office which responded with several deputies. They took Castillo into custody. According to a police report obtained by BocaNewsNow.com, Castillo and the victim do not have a relationship of any sort, but its believed Castillo was infatuated with the victim. Wrote police: While Castillo was still attending FAU there were incidents where Castillo would show up to her class and disrupt it. Once Castillo no longer attended FAU he began to stalk her social media accounts and work email. (The victim) believes Castillo had over ten fictitious accounts which he would use to contact her. It got so bad that (the victim) had to delete some of her social media accounts. It was when Castillo contacted her on her work email that she reported him to FAU Police. (The victim) advised there was another incident where she reported him to Delay Beach Police. (The victim) provided countless screen shots in which Castillo is attempting to contact her, even after she has advised him to leave her alone. Castillo, who officially lives in California, was arrested and charged with residential burglary. He was booked into the Palm Beach County Jail. Castillo later posted $25,000 bond and was released pending trial. An order of no contact is now in effect. Communities up and down Lyons Road between Clint Moore and Atlantic continue to have issues with security gates and guards as PBSO continues to battle car thefts and other issues in the area. While drivers are stopped at gates and required to show identification, it is often quite easy to walk or bike into the gated communities in that area. ___________________________________________________ >Thanks to Lisa for this story: I was scheduled to fly from North Carolina to Germany, where my husband was stationed in the military. As I checked in at the airport, the ticket agent asked me some standard security questions. "Has anyone given you any packages that you didn't pack yourself?" he asked. I told him that my mother-in-law had given me a parcel to take to her son. He looked at me very carefully and asked: "Does she like you?" __________________________________________________ He said a woman brought her baby to see him, and he determined right away that the baby had an earache. He wrote a prescription for ear drops. In the directions he wrote, "Put two drops in right ear every four hours" and he abbreviated "right" as an R with a circle around it. Several days passed, and the woman returned with her baby, complaining that the baby still had an earache, and his little behind was getting really greasy with all those drops of oil. The doctor looked at the bottle of ear drops and sure enough, the pharmacist had typed the following instructions on the label: "Put two drops in R ear every four hours." ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ A principal is making his rounds in the school when he hears a terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushes in and spots one boy, taller than the others, who seems to be making the most noise. He seizes the lad, drags him to the hall, and tells him to wait there until he is excused. Returning to the classroom, the principal restores order and lectures the class for half an hour about the importance of good behavior. "Now," he says, "are there any questions?" One girl stands up timidly. "Please sir," she asks, "may we have our teacher back?" ___________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From:Claudie Re: Transferring pix from camera Dear Webby, What is better, to take the chip out of a camera and use a chip reader to transfer the pictures to the computer, or plug the camera directly into the computer? Claudie Dear Claudie Spend $12 on a chip reader. It is much faster, and does not drain your camera battery. I have used mine about 28 years. Have FUN! DearWebby ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries. Boy: It's very kind of you, darling. But I don't have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet. ___________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From:Claudie Re: Transferring pix from camera Dear Webby, What is better, to take the chip out of a camera and use a chip reader to transfer the pictures to the computer, or plug the camera directly into the computer? Claudie Dear Claudie If you use a cheap chip reader, the transfer speed is much higher and the camera batteries are not affected. I use a $12 chip reader for about 28 years now. Have FUN! DearWebby __________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the humor letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work,please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! __________________________________________________ History Today June 30, in 1097, The Crusaders defeated the Turks at Dorylaeum. 1841, The Erie Railroad rolled out its first passenger train. 1859, Charles Blondin became the first person to cross Niagara Falls on a tightrope. 1894, Korea declared independence from China and asked for Japanese aid. 1908, A meteor explosion in Siberia knocked down trees in a 40-mile radius and struck people unconscious some 40 miles away. 1912, Belgian workers went on strike to demand universal suffrage. 1913, Fighting broke out between Bulgaria and Greece and Serbia. It was the beginning of the Second Balkan War. 1915, During World War I, the Second Battle of Artois ended when the French failed to take Vimy Ridge. 1921, U.S. President Warren G. Harding appointed former President William Howard Taft chief justice of the United States. 1922, Irish rebels in London assassinated Sir Henry Wilson, the British deputy for Northern Ireland. 1930, France pulled its troops out of Germanys Rhineland. 1934, Adolf Hitler purged the Nazi Party by destroying the SA and bringing to power the SS in the "Night of the Long Knives." 1935, Fascists caused an uproar at the League of Nations when Haile Selassie of Ethiopia speaks. 1936, Margaret Mitchells book, "Gone with the Wind," was published. 1950, U.S. President Harry Truman ordered U.S. troops into Korea and authorizes the draft. 1951, On orders from Washington, General Matthew Ridgeway broadcasts that the United Nations was willing to discuss an armistice with North Korea. 1952, CBS-TV debuted "The Guiding Light." 1953, The first Corvette rolled off the Chevrolet assembly line in Flint, MI. It sold for $3,250. 1955, The U.S. began funding West Germanys rearmament. 1957, The American occupation headquarter in Japan was dissolved. 1958, The U.S. Congress passed a law authorizing the admission of Alaska as the 49th state in the Union. 1960, The Katanga province seceded from Congo (upon Congo's independence from Belgium). 1964, The last of U.N. troops left Congo after a four-year effort to bring stability to the country. 1971, The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the government could not prevent the Washington Post or the New York Times from publishing the Pentagon Papers. 1971, The Soviet spacecraft Soyuz 11 returned to Earth. The three cosmonauts were found dead inside. 1971, The 26th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified when Ohio became the 38th state to approve it. The amendment lowered the minimum voting age to 18. 1974, Russian ballet dancer Mikhail Baryshnikov defected in Toronto, Canada. 1974, The July 4th scene from the Steven Spielberg movie "Jaws" was filmed. 1977, U.S. President Jimmy Carter announced his opposition to the B-1 bomber. 1985, Yul Brynner left his role as the King of Siam after 4,600 performances in "The King and I." 1986, The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that states could outlaw homosexual acts between consenting adults. 1994, The U.S. Figure Skating Association stripped Tonya Harding of the 1994 national championship and banned her from the organization for life for an attack on rival Nancy Kerrigan. 1998, Officials confirmed that the remains of a Vietnam War serviceman buried in the Tomb of the Unknowns at Arlington National Cemetery were identified as those of Air Force pilot Michael J. Blassie. 2000, U.S. President Clinton signed the E-Signature bill to give the same legal validity to an electronic signature as a signature in pen and ink. 2004, The international Cassini spacecraft entered Saturn's orbit. The craft had been on a nearly seven-year journey. 2023, Do smiled.
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