--- Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, July 7 Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Fashist climbs to foot of Statue of Liberty Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, July 7 in 1930 Construction began on Boulder Dam, later Hoover Dam, on the Colorado River. More of today in history at HIstory ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement. --- Socratex Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else. --- James M. Barrie (1860 - 1937 ____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law Pete in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase. "What happened Paddy ?" she asks anxiously. "What happened!! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip. I get home... and guess what I found?? "Yes, your daughter, my wife Jean, naked with Tim McDurmt in our marital bed! This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!" "Come now, calm down, calm down Paddy!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. 'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened." Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. "There now Pete, you see? I told you there must be a simple explanation! "Well, WHAT is it?" Fumed Pete. "She never got your E-mail!" _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ MY ahirt! _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! _____________________________________________________ Knowing that the minister was very fond of cherry brandy, one of the church elders offered to present him with a bottle on one consideration - that the pastor acknowledge receipt of the gift in the church paper. "Gladly," responded the good man. When the church magazine came out a few days later, the elder turned at once to the "appreciation" column. There he read: "The minister extends his thanks to Elder Brown for his gift of fruit and for the spirit in which it was given." ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Therese Patricia Okoumou, 44, Staten Island, New York Fashist climbs to foot of Statue of Liberty Okoumou, a fanatic Fashist, climbed to the base of the Statue of Liberty to protest the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency, which enforces decades-long federal immigration law that predates President Trump's tenure. She is a member of Rise and Resist, an anti-Trump group that claims because they are kinda stupid but noisy, they overrule the elected government, which held an Abolish ICE banner at the foot of the Statue of Liberty before her climb. The Hilarites demand open borders and to allow free and unchecked access for MS13 and other welfare recipients. And as Fashists, they claim they are right and the elected government is wrong. Okoumou vowed to stay atop the Statue of Liberty until all the illegal-alien children are released. In reality, Okoumou came down two hours into her failed publicity stunt after being taken into custody and jailed by the cops. The morons don't realize that the kids of arrested criminals, no matter whether the criminals had burglared into a bank or a country, can not be released onto the street, but have to remain with Child Services. Unlike the Obama era cages, nowadays Child services places the kids with foster homes or juvenile detention schools. Liberty Island had to evacuate 4,500 tourists on Independence Day thanks to Okoumou and her motley crew of fashist protesters. Okoumou is now sitting in jail along with six of her "Rise and Resist" crew, who ruined a holiday for innocent bystanders and police alike. Okoumou is facing charges of trespassing, disorderly conduct, and interfering with government functions. In August 2017, Okoumou was arrested and charged with misdemeanor assault for injuring a cop while resisting arrest during a protest. She has a history of filing unsuccessful race-discrimination lawsuits. In 2003, she filed a wrongful-termination lawsuit claiming racial discrimination after being fired from a battered-women's shelter called Safe Horizons. According to court records, Okoumou's boss said she was fired because she was rude and unprofessional to clients and colleagues. She lost the lawsuit. In 2007, Okoumou unsuccessfully filed another race discrimination complaint against a group home in Staten Island. It's unclear who's paying Okoumou's bills while she participates in weekly anti-Trump protests, or why she didn't launch similar protests when Barack Obama jailed and mass-deported illegal aliens during his eight years as president. The only change is that under Trump the detention facilities and procedures were drastically improved. Tech Support Pits From: CJW Re: Temp File dear webby. question is there anyway to block this folder %temp%. type it run. see the email below about the question posed to me. thanks helmut! cjw MICROSOFT HAS A SECRET TEMP FOLDER THAT TAKES QUITE A BIT OF SPACE. TO DELETE THIS FOLDER GO TO START, RUN, AND TYPE IN %TEMP%. THEN OPEN, SELECT ALL AND DELETE. YOU 'LL GET A MESSAGE CANT THIS FILE, CLICK OK AND MOVE TO THE NEXT ONES. MAKE SURE ALL OPEN WINDOWS ARE CLOSED. WHEN I STARTED HAD 1700 ITEMS, FINISHED WITH THREE. DO THIS EVERY SO OFTEN. MARY REAL SIMPLE!! LOL CJW Dear Chuck What kind of Caps-Locker BS is that? The temp folder is not secret, never has been secret, and never will be secret. It is at C:\Documents and Settings\YourName\Local Settings\Temp There are more temp files in the same area. So what? You can use CrapCleaner to weed them out, but your browser will be slower, when it has to download stuff instead of re-using it. Honestly, it's not a sinister conspiracy to catch "Agent CapsLock". However, just because you are paranoid, that does not mean they are not out to get you! Have FUN DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. My Parents had not been out together in quite some time. One Saturday, as Mom was finishing the dinner dishes, my father stepped up behind her. "Would you like to go out, girl?" he asked. Not even turning around, my mother quickly replied, "Oh, yes, I'd love to!" They had a wonderful evening, and it wasn't until the end of it that Dad confessed. His question had actually been directed to the family dog, lying near Mom's feet on the kitchen floor. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
And old fellow was snoozing away contentedly when he was startled awake by the doorbell. He staggered off the couch to make his way to the door. There stood a gorgeous young woman. "Oh my goodness," the pretty young thing exclaimed, "I'm at the wrong house." "Sweety, you're at the right house," the old guy assured her. "But you're forty years too late." ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Bringing Batteries on Camping Trips Before packing electronic devices or flashlights, remove the batteries before and store them in a ziplock bag. That way if something accidentally gets flipped on, you won't run down your batteries. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ | | A strange tooth washed up on the shore in North Carolina a couple of years ago. |
___________________________________________________ I was listening to a lady who called a radio pastor. The pastor was a wise, grandfatherly gentleman who has that calm reassuring voice that can melt all fear. The lady, who was obviously crying, said, "Pastor, I was born blind, and I've been blind all my life. I don't mind being blind but I have some well meaning friends who tell me that if I had more faith I could be healed." The pastor asked her, "Tell me, do you carry one of those white tipped canes?" "Yes I do," she replied. "Then the next time someone says that, hit them over the head with the cane," He said. "Then tell them 'If they had more faith that wouldn't hurt!'" ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," she explained. "Oh, and it took a while to fix it," said the passenger. "Not exactly." replied the stewardess, "It just took us a bit to find a deaf pilot." ____________________________________________________ | Today, July 7 in 1754 Kings College opened in New York City. It was renamed Columbia College 30 years later. 1846 U.S. annexation of California was proclaimed at Monterey after the surrender of a Mexican garrison. 1862 The first railroad post office was tested on the Hannibal and St. Joseph Railroad in Missouri. 1885 G. Moore Peters patented the cartridge-loading machine. 1917 Aleksandr Kerensky formed a provisional government in Russia. 1920 A device known as the radio compass was used for the first time on a U.S. Navy airplane near Norfolk, VA. 1930 Construction began on Boulder Dam, later Hoover Dam, on the Colorado River. 1937 Japanese forces invaded China. 1946 Mother Frances Xavier Cabrini was canonized as the first American saint. 1950 The U.N. Security Council authorized military aid for South Korea. 1969 Canada's House of Commons gave final approval to a measure that made the French language equal to English throughout the national government. 1981 U.S. President Reagan announced he was nominating Arizona Judge Sandra Day O'Connor to become the first female justice on the U.S. Supreme Court. 1983 Eleven-year-old Samantha Smith of Manchester, Maine, left for a visit to the Soviet Union at the personal invitation of Soviet leader Yuri V. Andropov. 1987 Public testimony at the Iran-Contra hearing began. 1994 Amazon.com, Inc. was founded in Seattle, Washington under the name "Cadabra." 1998 A jury in Santa Monica, CA, convicted Mikail Markhasev of murdering Ennis Cosby, Bill Cosby's only son, during a roadside robbery. 1999 In Sierra Leone, President Ahmad Tejan Kabbah and rebel leader Foday Sankoh signed a pact to end the nation's civil war. 2000 Cisco Systems Inc. announced that it would buy Netiverse Inc. for $210 million in stock. It was the 13th time Cisco had purchased a company in 2000. 2000 Amazon.com announced that they had sold almost 400,000 copies of "Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire," making it the biggest selling book in e-tailing history. 2003 In Liberia, a team of U.S. military experts arrived at the U.S. embassy compound to assess whether to deploy troops as part of a peacekeeping force in the country. 2018 Do smiled. |
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