Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, June 8 Thank you Marilyn !!! Still problems at Telus! They gave me back the speed I had before they sabotaged me on May 31, but their routing is still screwed up. Giving me back the speed I had for the last 10 years proved that they had lied about the copper getting old and rotten. They are now planning to "upgrade" me from copper to fiber on June 10, and claim that will fix their screw-up. We'll see. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Tennessee woman arrested for speeding through COVID-19 vaccination tent in protest ___________________________________________________ Today, June 8 in 1790 The first loan for the U.S. was repaid. The Temporary Loan of 1789 was negotiated and secured on September 18, 1789 by Alexander Hamilton. ____________________________________________________ Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. --- Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977) ____________________________________________________ At age ninety-two, Grandma Fritz still lived in her old two-story farmhouse, made homemade noodles, and did her laundry in her wringer-washer in the basement. She maintained her vegetable garden, big enough to feed all of Benton County, with just a hoe and spade. Her seventy-year-old children lovingly protested when she insisted on mowing her huge lawn with her ancient push mower. "I only work outside in the cool, early mornings and in the evenings," Grandma explained, "and I always wear my sunbonnet." Still, her children were understandably relieved when they heard she was attending the noon lunches at the local senior citizens' center. Yes, Grandma admitted, as her daughter nodded approvingly. "I cook for them. Those old people appreciate it so much!" ____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________ Bob, an experienced sky diver, was getting ready for a jump one day when he spotted another man outfitted to jump wearing dark glasses, carrying a white cane and holding a seeing-eye dog by a leash. Shocked that the blind man was also going to jump, Bob struck up a conversation, expressing his admiration for the man's courage.Then, curious, he asked, "How do you know when the ground is getting close?" "Easy," replied the blind man. "The leash goes slack." ---- That's actually an old smoke-jumper trick routinely used in forest fire fighting. You have your 66 pound pack on a 50 foot rope and first throw your pack out. After that even the most scared newbie can not change his mind, the pack pulls him out of the plane. When the rope goes slack, you drop your shovel and put your arms in front of your face for protection against the branches and sticks that you might be crashing through in a moment. The last 10 feet above the ground the smoke is normally a lot thinner and for almost a second you can see what you are going to hit, --- unless the chute gets hung up in a tree and you get flung sideways into the tree. I haven't done any forest fire fighting in many years, and they may have changed the procedures by now, but that's the way we used to do it. ____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Virginia Christine Lewis Brown, 36, Greenback, Tennessee USA Tennessee woman arrested for speeding through COVID-19 vaccination tent in protest A Tennessee woman was arrested this week after authorities say she drove her SUV through a COVID-19 vaccination tent, nearly hitting several people while yelling "no vaccine." Virginia Christine Lewis Brown, 36, of Greenback, has been charged with seven felony counts of reckless endangerment. She was released on bonds totalling $21,000 and has an initial court appearance set for June 7, according to the Blount County Sheriff's Office. Virginia Christine Lewis Brown, 36, of Greenback, has been charged with seven felony counts of reckless endangerment. She was released on bonds totalling $21,000 and has an initial court appearance set for June 7, according to the Blount County Sheriff's Office. It was unclear whether she had obtained an attorney who could speak on her behalf. The incident in question occurred Monday morning at a COVID-19 vaccination tent set up in the parking lot of the Foothills Mall in Maryville, a suburb of Knoxville. According to an incident report, two deputies from the Blount County Sheriff's Office said they were at the location when they saw a blue Chrysler SUV speed through a cone course, past the check-in area and then through the tent, where several health workers and National Guard personnel were preparing to administer COVID-19 vaccines. The vehicle did not stop and was traveling at a "high rate of speed," deputies wrote in the incident report. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: DearWebby RE: Telus Problem Contrary to the lies that Telus told me about rotten copper, They have magically restored the speed to the way it had been for many years until their sabotage on May 31, Routing is still bad, though. They promised that the routing will get fixed when they connect me to the fiber on June 10. Dear Do! There may be some more disruption on June 10 or 11 Have FUN! DearWebby Teacher: "Now, Johnny, what's the most important question to ask when you want to have safe sex?" 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_____________________________________________ Help! Help" cried the young woman as she ran up the steps of the police station. "An Irishman molested me!" How do you know he was Irish? inquired the sergeant at the desk. "I had to help him" she gasped. ___________________________________________ Thanks to Tony for this one: As an elderly lady sat on her front porch reflecting on her long life,a fairy godmother suddenly appeared and offered to fulfill three wishes for her. "Well" the woman said, "I guess I'd like to be rich" POOF!The fairy godmother turned the rocking chair into solid gold. "And i would not mind being a young and beautiful princess" POOF! The fairy godmother turned the old woman into an exquisite young princess,with priceless crown of jewels. "Your third wish?"asked the fairy godmother. The elderly woman's dog raised his head and uttered a single weak, hoarse woof. "Could you turn my wonderful dog into a handsome prince ?" POOF! There in front of the old woman,who was now a beautiful princess,stood the most handsome young man anyone had ever seen. She stared at him in awe, compleatly smitten. As he came towards her, her knees weakened. He bent down, brushing his lips across her ear as he whispered, "I,ll bet you are sorry now that you had me neutered!" ____________________________________________ One day, farmer Bill was in town picking up supplies for his farm. He stopped by the hardware store and picked up a bucket and an anvil. Then, he stopped by the livestock dealer to buy a couple of chickens and a goose. However, he now had a problem, how to carry all of his purchases home? The livestock dealer said: "Why don't you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?" "Hey, thanks!" the farmer said, and off he went. While walking he met a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked: "Can you tell me how to get to 123 Town Road?" The farmer said: "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 132 Town Road. Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time" The little old lady said: "How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?" The farmer said: "Holy smokes lady, I am carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?" The lady said: "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens." ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, June 8, in 0452 Italy was invaded by Attila the Hun. 0793 The Vikings raided the Northumbrian coast of England. 1786 In New York City, commercially manufactured ice cream was advertised for the first time. 1790 The first loan for the U.S. was repaid. The Temporary Loan of 1789 was negotiated and secured on September 18, 1789 by Alexander Hamilton. 1861 Tennessee voted to secede from the Union and joined the Confederacy. 1866 Prussia annexed the region of Holstein. 1869 Ives W. McGaffey received a U.S. patent for the suction vacuum cleaner. 1872 The penny postcard was authorized by the U.S. Congress. 1904 U.S. Marines landed in Tangiers, Morocco, to protect U.S. citizens. 1915 U.S. Secretary of State William Jennings Bryan resigned in a disagreement over U.S. handling of the sinking of the Lusitania. 1934 The Cincinnati Reds became the first Major League team to use an airplane to travel from one city to another. They flew from Cincinnati to Chicago. 1947 "Lassie Show" debuted on ABC radio. It was a 15-minute show. 1953 The U.S. Supreme Court outlawed segregated restaurants in Washington, DC. 1965 U.S. troops in South Vietnam were given orders to begin fighting offensively. 1967 Israeli airplanes attacked the USS Liberty in the Mediterranean during the 6-Day War between Israel and its Arab neighbors. 34 U.S. Navy crewmen were killed. Israel later called the incident a tragic mistake due to the mis- identification of the ship. The U.S. has never publicly investigated the incident. 1969 U.S. President Richard Nixon met with President Thieu of South Vietnam to tell him 25,000 U.S. troops would pull out by August. 1978 A jury in Clark County, Nevada, ruled that the "Mormon will," was a forgery. The work was supposedly written by Howard Hughes. 1982 U.S. President Reagan became the first American chief executive to address a joint session of the British Parliament. 1987 Fawn Hill began testifying in the Iran-Contra hearings. She said that she had helped to shred some documents. 1991 A victory parade was held in Washington, DC, to honor veterans of the Persian Gulf War. 1994 The warring factions in Bosnia agreed to a one-month cease-fire. 1995 U.S. Air Force pilot Captain Scott O'Grady was rescued by U.S. Marines after surviving alone in Bosnia after his F-16 fighter was shot down on June 2. 1996 China set off an underground nuclear test blast. 1998 The National Rifle Association elected Charlton Heston to be its president. 1998 In the U.S., the FTC brought an antitrust complaint against Intel Corp., alleging its policies punished other developers of microprocessor chips. 1998 Honda agreed to pay $17.1 million for disconnecting anti- pollution devices in 1.6 million cars. 1998 The space shuttle Discovery pulled away from Mir, ending America's three-year partnership with Russia. 2000 The Dallas Stars and the New Jersey Devils played the NHL's longest scoreless game in Stanley Cup finals history. The fifth game of the series lasted 106 minutes and 21 seconds. The game ended with a goal by Mike Madano that allowed the Stars to play a game six back in Dallas. 2001 Marc Chagall's painting "Study for 'Over Vitebsk" was stolen from the Jewish Museum in New York City. The 8x10 painting was valued at about $1 million. A group called the International Committee for Art and Peace later announced that they would return the painting after the Israelis and Palestinians made peace. 2004 Nate Olive and Sarah Jones began the first known continuous hike of the 1,800-mile trail down the U.S. Pacific Coast. They completed the trek at the U.S.-Mexico border on September 28. 2021 Do smiled. |
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