Good Morning, ! Today Is Monday, Sept 25 Thank You, Karl!!! Welcome back, Karl! Right now I am feeling very sorry for myself. I had a balance malfunction due to low blood sugar and did a "Fall Down Go Boom". I twisted to protect my head and impacted with my butt. Dumb! My head is just bone and can take that easily. It took me about an hour to get up. So now my back is very sore. Dumb! Would have been a lot easier to get up with somebody helping, or at least laughing. Guess I should smarten up and find a girl, who does nor require a millionaire. Because I am definitely NOT one. ___________________________________________________ Q All Truths Are Easy To Understand Once They Are Discovered; The Point Is To Discover Them. --- Galileo Galilei (1564 - 1642) Then They Will Be Denied By The Facebook "Fact Checkers", Which Always Lie. That Is Your Proof! ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award Registered Sex Offender Facing Additional Charges After Being In Park With Child ___________________________________________________ If You Can Spare A Coin, Please Hit Paypal With It! ___________________________________________________ History On This Day, Sept 25, In 1513, The Pacific Ocean Was Discovered By Spanish Explorer Vasco Nunez De Balboa When He Crossed The Isthmus Of Panama. He Named The Body Of Water The South Sea. He Was Truly Just The First European To See The Pacific Ocean. ____________________________________________________ A Clergyman, Walking Down A Country Lane, Sees A Young Farmer Struggling To Load Hay Back Onto A Cart After It Had Fallen Off. "You Look Hot, My Son," Said The Cleric. "Why Don't You Rest A Moment, And I'll Give You A Hand." "No Thanks," Said The Young Man. "My Father Wouldn't Like It." "Don't Be Silly," The Minister Said. "Everyone Is Entitled To A Break. Come And Have A Drink Of Water." Again The Young Man Protested That His Father Would Be Upset. Losing His Patience, The Clergyman Said, "Your Father Must Be A Real Slave Driver. Tell Me Where I Can Find Him And I'll Give Him A Piece Of My Mind!" And The Young Farmer Said, "Well, He's Under The Load Of Hay And Getting Rather Pissed Off." __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ If You Can Spare A Coin, Please Hit Paypal With It! ___________________________________________________ Speaking Of "Pissed Off": Linda, A Friend And 25 Year Subscriber, Is Getting That Pissed Off. She Had Clicked On A Link, That Had Promised Some Cheese Cake Recipes. Instead Of Shoing The Recipes, It Put Cheesecape Into Her Amazon Shopping Cart, Plus A Bunch Of Other Stuf, That She Had Abssolutely No Intention Of Buying> Needless To Say, She Emptied That Cart And Put Amazon Into The Block, As If It Was Child Porno. No More Of That Shit! Thanks To Linda, Watch Out For Cream Cheese And Amazon. Always Order That Staff To Your Mayor's Email Address. Let Him Or Her Fight Those Crooks! ___________________________________________________ A Man With A Nagging Secret Couldn't Keep It Any Longer. In The Confessional He Admitted That He Had Been Stealing Building Supplies For Years From The Lumberyard Where He Worked. "What Did You Take?" His Priest Asked. "Enough To Build My Own House And Enough For My Son's House. And Houses For Our Two Daughters And Our Cottage At The Lake." "This Is Very Serious," The Priest Said. "I Shall Have To Think Of A Far-Reaching Penance. Have You Ever Done A Retreat?" "No, Father, I Haven't," The Man Replied. "But, If You Can Get The Plans, I Can Get The Lumber." __________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ Dearwebby's Tech Support Pits From: Walter Re: Spreadsheet Lines Hi Dear Webby. Thank You For Quick Response. I Am Using O O, Which I Should Have Mentioned. I Can't Locate The Button With The Sidelines. I Just Want The Grid Lines To Show When Printing The Page. Be Well, Live Long, Prosper, And Carpe Diem, Walter Dear Walter File New Spreadsheet Scroll Way Over To The Right Till You See The Crosdsdhairs. That Lets You Choose What Kind Of Grid Lines You Want, Horizontal, Vertical, Both, Just The Selection, Etc. Have Fun! Dearwebby ________________________________________________ My Next-Door Neighbor And I Frequently Borrow Things From Each Other. Not Long Ago, When I Requested His Ladder, He Told Me He Had Lent It To His Son. Recalling A Saying My Grandmother Used To Repeat, I Recited, "You Should Never Lend Anything To Your Kids, Because You Will Never Get It Back." With That, My Neighbor Said, "Well, It's Not Even My Ladder. It's My Dad's." ___________________________________________________ If You Can Spare A Coin, Please Hit Paypal With It! ___________________________________________________ A Hospital Posted A Notice In The Nurses' Mess Saying: "Remember, The First Five Minutes Of A Human Being's Life Are The Most Dangerous." Underneath, A Nurse Had Written: "The Last Five Are Pretty Risky, Too." ____________________________________________ A Bonehead Award Has Been Reported By Rock Robin Lish, 61, Kendall, Illinois Usa Registered Sex Offender Facing Additional Charges After Being In Park With Child A Yorkville Man, Who Is A Registered Sex Offender, Is Facing Additional Charges After Police Allege That He Was At Silver Springs State Park With A Juvenile Earlier This Month. The Kendall County Sheriff's Office Says That 61-Year-Old Robin Lish Is Now Charged With Child Pornography, Child Photography By A Child Sex Offender, Sexual Exploitation Of Child, And Unlawful Presence Of A Child Sex Offender In A Public Park. Deputies Were Called To The Park On September 4 For A Report That Lish Was There With A Juvenile. The Sheriff's Office Says Lish Was Located With The Juvenile And That The Two Knew Each Other. Lish Was Initially Charged With Being A Sex Offender In A Public Park And Arrested. The Sheriff's Office Says That Thanks To The Vigilance Of The Community, Police Were Able To Intervene In A Situation Before It Could Have Progressed Further. Lish Is Being Held In The Kendall County Jail In Yorkville. _____________________________________________________ An Elderly Lady Did Her Shopping And Upon Return Found Four Males In Her Car. She Dropped Her Shopping Bags And Drew Her Handgun, Proceeding To Scream At Them At The Top Of Her Voice That She Knows How To Use It And That She Will If Required, So Get The Hell Out Of The Car. The Four Men Didn't Wait Around For A Second Invitation But Got Out And Ran Like Mad, Where Upon The Lady Proceeded To Load Her Shopping Bags Into The Back Of The Car And Got Into The Drivers Seat. Small Problem, Her Key Wouldn't Fit The Ignition. Her Car Was Identical And Parked Four Or Five Spaces Further Down. She Loaded Her Bags Into Her Car And Drove To The Police Station. The Sergeant That She Told The Story To Nearly Tore Himself In Two With Laughter And Pointed To The Other End Of The Counter Where Four Pale White Males Were Reporting A Car Jacking By A Mad Elderly White Women. No Charges Were Filed. __________________________________________________ A Circus Owner Walked Into A Bar To Find Everyone Crowded About A Table Watching A Little Show. On The Table Was An Upside-Down Pot And A Duck Tap Dancing On It. The Circus Owner Was So Impressed That He Offered To Buy The Duck From Its Owner. After Some Wheeling And Dealing They Settled For $10,000 For The Duck And The Pot. Three Days Later The Circus Owner Runs Back To The Bar In Anger, "Your Duck Is A Rip-Off! I Put Him On The Pot Before A Whole Audience And He Didn't Dance A Single Step!" "That's Strange" Said The Duck's Former Owner, "Did You Remember To Light The Candle Under The Pot?" __________________________________________________ History On Sept 25, In 1493, Christopher Columbus Left Spain With 17 Ships On His Second Voyage To The Western Hemisphere. 1513, The Pacific Ocean Was Discovered By Spanish Explorer Vasco Nunez De Balboa When He Crossed The Isthmus Of Panama. He Named The Body Of Water The South Sea. He Was Truly Just The First European To See The Pacific Ocean. 1690, One Of America's Earliest Newspapers Published Its First And Last Edition. The "Publik Occurences Both Foreign And Domestik" Was Published At The London Coffee House In Boston, Ma, By Benjamin Harris. 1775, Ethan Allen Was Captured By The British During The American Revolutionary War. He Was Leading The Attack On Montreal. 1789, The First U.S. Congress Adopted 12 Amendments To The Constitution. Ten Of The Amendments Became The Bill Of Rights. 1847, During The Mexican-American War, U.S. Forces Led By General Zachary Taylor Captured Monterrey Mexico. 1890, The Sequoia National Park Was Established As A U.S. National Park In Central California. I Have Seen That! Most Definitely Worth Visiting At Least Once In Your Life! 1890, Mormon President Wilford Woodruff Issued A Manifesto In Which The Practice Of Polygamy Was Renounced. 1919, U.S. President Woodrow Wilson Collapsed After A Speech In Pueblo, Co. The Speaking Tour Was In Support Of The Treaty Of Versailles. 1933, Tom Mix Was Heard On Nbc Radio For The First Time. His Show Ran Until June Of 1950. 1956, A Transatlantic Telephone-Cable System Began Operation Between Newfoundland And Scotland. 1957, 300 U.S. Army Troops Stood Guard As Nine Black Students Were Escorted To Class At Central High School In Little Rock, Ar. The Children Had Been Forced To Withdraw 2 Days Earlier Because Of Unruly White Mobs. 1973, The Three Crewmen Of Skylab Ii Landed In The Pacific Ocean After Being On The U.S. Space Laboratory For 59 Days. 1978, Melissa Ludtke, A Writer For "Sports Illustrated", Filed A Suit In U.S. District Court. The Result Was That Major League Baseball Could Not Bar Female Writers From The Locker Room After The Game. 1981, Sandra Day O'connor Became The First Female Justice Of The U.S. Supreme Court When She Was Sworn In As The 102nd Justice. She Had Been Nominated The Previous July By U.S. President Ronald Reagan. 1983, A Soviet Military Officer, Stanislav Petrov, Averted A Potential Worldwide Nuclear War. He Declared A False Alarm After A U.S. Attack Was Detected By A Soviet Early Warning System. It Was Later Discovered The Alarms Had Been Set Off When The Satellite Warning System Mistakenly Interpreted Sunlight Reflections Off Clouds As The Presence Of Enemy Missiles. 1986, An 1894-S Barber Head Dime Was Bought For $83,000 At A Coin Auction In California. It Is One Of A Dozen That Exist. 1987, The Booty Collected From The Wydah, Which Sunk Off Cape Cod In 1717, Was Auctioned Off. The Worth Was Around $400 Million. 1990, The U.N. Security Council Voted To Impose An Air Embargo Against Iraq. Cuba Was The Only Dissenting Vote. 1991, The U.N. Security Council Unanimously Ordered A Worldwide Arms Embargo Against Yugoslavia And All Of Its Warring Factions. 1992, In Orlando, Fl, A Judge Ruled In Favor Of 12-Year-Old Gregory Kingsley. He Had Sought A Divorce From His Biological Parents. 1992, The Mars Observer Blasted Off On A Mission That Cost $980 Million. The Probe Has Not Been Heard From Since It Reached Mars In August Of 1993. 1995, Ross Perot Announced That He Would Form The Independence Party. 1997, Nbc Sportscaster Marv Albert Pled Guilty To Assault And Battery Of A Lover. He Was Fired From Nbc Within Hours. 2001, Michael Jordan Announced That He Would Return To The Nba As A Player For The Washington Wizards. Jordan Became The President Of Basketball Operations For The Team On January 19, 2000. 2002, U.S. Forces Landed In Ivory Coast To Aid In The Rescue Foreigners Trapped In A School By Fighting Between Government Troops And Rebel Troops. Rebels Had Attempted To Take Over The Government On September 19. 2012, China Launched Its First Aircraft Carrier Into Service. Very Impressive! 2023, ! Smiled. Have Fun Dearwebby
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