Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, February 2 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today, February 2, in 1863 Samuel Langhorne Clemens used a pseudonym for the first time. He is better remembered by the pseudonym which is Mark Twain. ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Award When Girlfriend Wouldn't Get in Car, Arizona. Man Ran Her Down and Killed Her ___________________________________________________ Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever. --- Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955) ___________________________________________________ A group of American tourists were being guided through an ancient castle in Europe. "This place," the guide told them, "is 1600 years old. Not a stone in it has been touched, nothing altered, nothing replaced in all those years." "Wow," said one woman dryly, "they must have the same landlord I have." ____________________________________________________ Swift Fox, Southern Alberta ____________________________________________________ "Darling," said the young man to his new bride. "Now that we are married, do you think you will be able to live on my modest income?" "Of course, dearest, no trouble," she answered. "But what will you live on?" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Brandon Lewis St. Ours, 37, Kingman, Arizona, USA When Girlfriend Wouldn't Get in Car, Ariz. Man Ran Her Down and Killed Her Awoman in Kingman, Ariz., is dead after police allege her boyfriend ran her down with his car and then tried to conceal his crime. The woman and her boyfriend, Brandon Lewis St. Ours, 37, of Kingman, got into an argument Saturday night at the home of a third party, the Mohave County Sheriff's Office said in a news release. As a result, the couple was asked to leave. Both did so, but St. Ours' girlfriend refused to get in his car and instead walked away. Authorities allege St. Ours drove around looking for the woman and, when he located her, struck her with his vehicle a short distance from the residence. "Brandon then fled the scene and parked his vehicle at another location in an obvious attempt to conceal it," according to the sheriff's office. At 7:40 p.m., sheriff's deputies and paramedics responded to the scene of a collision between a vehicle and pedestrian, and found the female had no pulse and was not breathing. She was rushed to the hospital while life-saving measures were attempted, but declared dead upon arrival, authorities said. Deputies who investigated learned about the earlier argument and tracked down St. Ours for questioning, after which he was arrested and taken to the Mohave County Jail and booked on charges of manslaughter by domestic violence and leaving the scene of a fatal accident, according to the sheriff's office. Online jail records show he was still in custody Monday morning. No bond was listed. Authorities located his vehicle and towed it as evidence, and the investigation is ongoing. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Dani Re: Option to view memory chip Dear Webby I just read your advise about a chip reader. However, I don't fully understand what you are say when you say. " Only ever use the one about looking at the files. Did you mean Never use the one about looking at the files? Thanks. Dani Dear Dani Yes, ALWAYS use the line for viewing files. There are some other, weird options, that you don't normally need. You COULD put a video game for x-rated Crocheting onto a chip, and THEN use the option for playing a game. And so on. Just use the option for viewing files with Windows Explorer. All the other options woould just waste your time. Have FUN! DearWebby A 48-year-old Slovenian man who was refused an appointment with a psychiatrist at a hospital in Izola drove his car through the hospital's glass doors and down the corridor, stopping at the reception desk to demand that he see a psychiatrist. When questioned by police as to why he did this, he rather expectedly replied, "I don't know - that's why I'm here." Slovenske Novice (Slovenia) | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ One day a State Trooper was pulling off an expressway near Chicago. When he turned onto the street at the end of the ramp, he noticed someone at a chicken place getting into her car. The driver placed the bucket of chicken on top of her car, got in and drove off with the bucket still on top of her car. So the trooper decided to pull her over and perform a community service by giving the driver her chicken. He pulled her over, walked up to the car, pulled the bucket off the roof and offered it to the driver. The driver looked at the trooper and said, "No thanks, I just bought some." ______________________________________________ The police recently busted a man selling tablets that he claimed stopped aging.. When going through their files they noticed it was the fourth time he was caught for doing this. He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856 and 1928. ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
Doctor: Nurse, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten quarters last night? Nurse: No change yet. ___________________________________________________ | Today, February 2, in 1536 The Argentine city of Buenos Aires was founded by Pedro de Mendoza of Spain. 1653 New Amsterdam, now known as New York City, was incorporated. 1802 The first leopard to be exhibited in the United States was shown by Othello Pollard in Boston, MA. 1848 The Mexican War was ended with the signing of the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo. The treaty turned over portions of land to the U.S., including Texas, New Mexico, Nevada, Utah, Arizona, California and parts of Colorado and Wyoming. The U.S. gave Mexico $15,000,000 and assumed responsibility of all claims against Mexico by American citizens. Texas had already entered the U.S. on December 29, 1845. 1848 The first shipload of Chinese emigrants arrived in San Francisco, CA. 1863 Samuel Langhorne Clemens used a pseudonym for the first time. He is better remembered by the pseudonym which is Mark Twain. 1870 The "Cardiff Giant" was revealed to be nothing more than carved gypsum. The discovery in Cardiff, NY, was alleged to be the petrified remains of a human. 1878 Greece declared war on Turkey. 1880 The S.S. Strathleven arrived in London with the first successful shipment of frozen mutton from Australia. 1887 The beginning of Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney, PA. 1892 William Painter patented the bottle cap. 1893 The Edison Studio in West Orange, NJ, made history when they filmed the first motion picture close-up. 1897 The Pennsylvania state capitol in Harrisburg was destroyed by fire. The new statehouse was dedicated nine years later on the same site. 1935 Leonard Keeler conducted the first test of the polygraph machine, in Portage, WI. 1943 During World War II, the remainder of Nazi forces from the Battle of Stalingrad surrendered to the Soviets. Stalingrad has since been renamed Volgograd. 1945 U.S. President Roosevelt and British Prime Minister Winston Churchill left for a summit in Yalta with Soviet leader Josef Stalin. 1946 The first Buck Rogers automatic pistol was made. 1962 The 8th and 9th planets aligned for the first time in 400 years. 1971 Idi Amin assumed power in Uganda after a coup that ousted President Milton Obote. 1980 The situation known as "Abscam" began when reports surfaced that the FBI had conducted a sting operation that targeted members of the U.S. Congress. Phony Arab businessmen were used in the operation. 1989 The final Russian armored column left Kabul, Afghanistan, after nine years of military occupation. They did not leave 98 Billion dollar's worth of arms and vehicles and jets behind. 1990 South African President F.W. de Klerk lifted a ban on the African National Congress and promised to free Nelson Mandela. 1998 U.S. President Clinton introduced the first balanced budget in 30 years. 1999 19 people were killed at Luanda international airport when a cargo plane crashed just after takeoff. 1999 Hugo Chavez Fras took office. He had been elected president of Venezuela in December 1998. 2004 It was reported that a white powder had been found in an office of Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. The CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) later confirmed that the powder was the poison ricin. 2021 Do smiled. |
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