Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, March 15 Thank you, Bonnie ! Today in ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Award Woman Charged With Seven Counts Of Stealing Firearms ___________________________________________________ Americans are benevolently ignorant about Canada, while Canadians are malevolently well informed about the United States. --- J. Bartlett Brebner 1979 Pope John Paul II published his first encyclical "Redemptor Hominis." In the work he warned of the growing gap between the rich and poor. Jesus had noticed that too. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today, March 15 in 44 BC Roman Emperor Julius Caesar was assassinated by high ranking Roman Senators. The day is known as the "Ides of March." ____________________________________________________ You don't get anything clean without getting something else dirty. --- Cecil Baxter A little learning is a dangerous thing but a lot of ignorance is just as bad. --- Bob Edwards ___________________________________________________ A Polititian and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The Polititian said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything." "That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything." The Polititian looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The young man of seven had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up and stood beside him and gazing up at the plaque he said quietly, "Good morning son." "Good morning pastor", Johnny replied, not taking his eyes off the plaque. "Sir, what is this?" Johnny asked. "Well son, these are all the members of our church who have died in the service", replied the pastor. Soberly, they stood together staring up at the large plaque. Little Johnny's voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, "Which one sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30 service?" ____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Two men arrive at the Pearly Gates at about the same time, both wanting to know if they will be admitted to heaven. St. Peter asks the first man his name, where he is from, and what he did in life. The man answers that he is John Smith and that he was a taxi driver in New York City. St. Peter looks through his book, then gives the man a luxurious silken robe and a golden staff, and bids him welcome into heaven for his eternal reward. St. Peter then asks the second man the same questions. He replies that his name is Thomas O'Malley, and that he was a priest in Chicago. St. Peter looks in his book, then gives him a used t-shirt and a wooden stick, and bids him to enter into heaven for his eternal reward. Father O'Malley says, Wait a minute! Why did that taxi driver get a silken robe and golden staff while I, a priest and a man of God, got a lousy t-shirt that won't even cover my butt, and a wooden stick? St. Peter told him that the rewards in heaven are based onresults, and while Father O'Malley preached, people slept, but while John Smith drove, people prayed! ____________________________________________________ Seen in a State Park in California: "Weather Station (A large sign with a Rock hanging on a rope) Check the Rock. If it's wet, it's raining. If it's moving, it's windy. If you can't see it, it's foggy. If rock is gone, it's a tornado." I wonder if that was inspired by the old 2 foot iron ball windometer by the bridge outside of Lethbridge, Alberta? One time driving by there a few years ago I noticed the ball was missing and mentioned it to my hitch-hiker. She didn't think it was safe to drive on up to Calgary. I agreed with her and we soon found safe and quiet cozy refuge in a really nice motel :-) ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Callie Riedel, Delray Beach, Florida, USA Woman Charged With Seven Counts Of Stealing Firearms A woman who has the same name as someone identified on social media as working at a local child dance studio is now facing serious charges following her arrest by the Palm Beach County Sheriffs Office. Callie Riedel of Park Tree Place in Delray Beach remains in the Palm Beach County Jail following her arrest late Friday. She is being held on $34,000.00 bond. According to the Palm Beach County Clerks Office, Riedel is charged with, burglary to a dwelling while armed, seven counts of grand theft of a firearm, and an additional charge of grand theft. While the arrest report continues to be processed, the Clerks Office reports that probable cause was found during a Saturday morning hearing and a public defender was appointed to represent Riedel. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Brenda Re: Request to verify I'm questioning a couple of emails in my inbox. They say they are from a support for my email and that they will "hold" my mail until I verify my account. I assume these are fishing emails but I am expecting an email from Westjet and it is not showing up after 24 hours, ( to confirm a booking). Could you please check on this for me? Thanks, Brenda Dear Brenda the ONLY legitimate support you got is me. And I will never ask you to verify anything by email. Gorgeous ladies like you I would rather invite for a coffee. Just dump the crap. Re Westjet, look in the trash, in case you accidentally elbowed it in there. Westjet used to have chat, if you have an account. Flying has been out of my budget for a few years and I have not been to their site for a long time. Even when I still had an account, I never had to worry about anything, just noticed a link to chat. Have FUN! DearWebby ____________________________________________ Church was planning a chili supper for the homeless, and Florence agreed to prepare four gallons of her rather mild variation. The man in charge of organizing the program asked Florence how she would describe her chili -- three alarm or four alarm. After hearing some of the ingredients that went into other chili donations, Florence replied, "I guess you'd call mine false alarm." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ "What do you love most about me," a husband asked his wife, "my tremendous athletic ability or my superior intellect?" "What I love most about you," responded the man's wife, "is your incredible sense of humor." ______________________________________________ Two rural church deacons who were having a sociable beer in the local tavern when they saw their minister drive by and take a good long look at their pickup trucks parked outside. One deacon ducked down and said, "I hope the reverend didn't see us or recognize my pickup." The other replied indifferently, "What difference does it make. God knows we're in here... and he's the only one who counts." The first deacon countered, "But God won't tell my wife." ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
The train rounded a slight bend and, with a shriek of its whistle, plunged into a tunnel. There were gasps of surprise from the corner where Anthony was kneeling on his seat. Suddenly the train rushed into broad daylight again, and a small voice lifted in wonder. "Wow! It's tomorrow!" exclaimed the small boy. ___________________________________________________ | Today, March 15, in 44 BC Roman Emperor Julius Caesar was assassinated by high ranking Roman Senators. The day is known as the "Ides of March." 1493 Christopher Columbus returned to Spain after his first New World voyage. 1778 In command of two frigates, the Frenchman la Perouse sailed east from Botany Bay for the last lap of his voyage around the world. 1781 During the American Revolution, the Battle of Guilford Courthouse took place in North Carolina. British General Cornwallis' 1,900 soldiers defeated an American force of 4,400. 1862 General John Hunt Morgan began four days of raids near the city of Gallatin, TN. 1877 The first cricket test between Australia and England was played in Melbourne. Australia won by 45 runs. 1892 New York State unveiled the new automatic ballot voting machine. 1892 Jesse W. Reno patented the Reno Inclined Elevator. It was the first escalator. 1902 In Boston, MA, 10,000 freight handlers went back to work after a weeklong strike. 1903 The British conquest of Nigeria was completed. 500,000 square miles were now controlled by the U.K. 1904 Three hundred Russians were killed as the Japanese shelled Port Arthur in Korea. 1916 U.S. President Woodrow Wilson sent 12,000 troops, under General Pershing, over the border of Mexico to pursue bandit Pancho Villa. The mission failed. 1917 Russian Czar Nicholas II abdicated himself and his son. His brother Grand Duke succeeded as czar. 1922 Fuad I assumed the title of king of Egypt after the country gained nominal independence from Britain. 1934 Henry Ford restored the $5 a day wage. 1937 In Chicago, IL, the first blood bank to preserve blood for transfusion by refrigeration was established at the Cook County Hospital. 1938 Oil was discovered in Saudi Arabia. 1939 German forces occupied Bohemia and Moravia, and part of Czechoslovakia. 1944 Cassino, Italy, was destroyed by Allied bombing. 1946 British Premier Attlee offered India full independence after agreement on a constitution. 1949 Clothes rationing in Great Britain ended nearly four years after the end of World War II. 1951 General de Lattre demanded that Paris send him more troops for the fight in Vietnam. 1951 The Persian parliament voted to nationalize the oil industry. 1955 The U.S. Air Force unveiled a self-guided missile. 1956 The musical "My Fair Lady" opened on Broadway. 1960 The first underwater park was established as Key Largo Coral Reef Preserve. 1964 In Montreal, Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor were married. 1968 The U.S. mint halted the practice of buying and selling gold. 1979 Pope John Paul II published his first encyclical "Redemptor Hominis." In the work he warned of the growing gap between the rich and poor. Jesus had noticed that too. 1982 Nicaragua's ruling junta proclaimed a month-long state of siege and suspended the nation's constitution for one day. This came a day after anti-government rebels destroyed two bridges near the Honduran border. 1985 In Brazil, two decades of military rule came to an end with the installation of a civilian government. 1989 The U.S. Food and Drug administration decided to impound all fruit imported from Chili after two cyanide- tainted grapes were found in Philadelphia, PA. 1990 Mikhail Gorbachev was elected the first executive president of the Soviet Union. 1990 The Ford Explorer was introduced to the public. 1990 The Soviet parliament ruled that Lithuania's declaration of independence was invalid and that Soviet law was still in force in the Baltic republic. 1991 Four Los Angeles police officers were indicted in the beating of Rodney King on March 3, 1991. (California) 1991 Yugoslav President Borisav Jovic resigned after about a week of anti-communist protests. 1994 U.S. President Clinton extended the moratorium on nuclear testing until September of 1995. 1996 The aviation firm Fokker NV collapsed. 1998 More than 15,000 ethnic Albanians marched in Yugoslavia to demand independence for Kosovo. 1998 CBS' "60 Minutes" aired an interview with former White House employee Kathleen Willey. Wiley said U.S. President Clinton made unwelcome sexual advances toward her in the Oval Office in 1993. 2002 Libyan Abdel Baset Ali Mohmed Al-Megrahi began his life sentence in a Scottish jail for his role in the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 on December 21, 1988. 2002 In the U.S., Burger King began selling a veggie burger. The event was billed as the first veggie burger to be sold nationally by a fast food chain. 2002 In Texas, Andrea Yates received a life sentence for drowning her five children on June 20, 2001. 2002 U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell told the Associated Press that the U.S. would stand by a 24-year pledge not to use nuclear arms against states that don't have them. 2022 Do smiled. |
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