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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Texan, who played with a gun and his kids and accidentally shot his daughter into the chest. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, March 8, in 1618 Johann Kepler discovered the third Law of Planetary Motion. History ______________________________________________________ Anything too stupid to be said is sung. --- Voltaire (1694 - 1778) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ My sister landed a good job with an accounting firm, and after a while she got a generous raise. The day she found out about it, her husband picked her up from work, and they stopped for ice cream. As they continued home, my sister blurted out, "Isn't it hard to believe that I have a job that pays this much money?" Just then, she went to toss the last of her ice cream cone out the window. However, the window was closed, and it smacked against the glass. Her husband replied calmly, "Yes, it is." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A tough old cowboy once counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his oatmeal every morning. The grandson did this religiously and he lived to the age of 93. When he died, he left 14 children, 28 grandchildren, 35 great grandchildren and a fifteen foot hole in the wall of the crematorium. ______________________________________________________ >From FB ______________________________________________________ If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Justin Ryan Jones, 30, Austin, Texas Father pretended to shoot daughter, gun went off. The 7-year-old son of an Austin man said his father was pretending to fire at his sister when the gun went off and he shot the 9-year-old girl, according to an arrest affidavit. Justin Ryan Jones, 30, is charged with injury to a child, a first-degree felony, and remained in the Bell County Jail Monday in lieu of a $25,000 bond, jail records showed. Jones allegedly told a Bell County Sheriffs Department deputy he was showing his children gun safety when the gun he was holding fired and shot his 9-year-old daughter. But Jones son said his father was pretending to shoot them. The 7-year-old said he liked the clicking sound the gun made. He said his father pulled the trigger and his sister was shot, the affidavit said. Jones 6-year-old son said his father was pointing the gun at his sister and held it in both hands while pretending the shoot them. The girl was shot in the upper chest area and was initially in critical condition when transported to Baylor Scott and White Memorial Hospital. The injuries she had led to several surgeries, but she was recently released from the hospital and is expected to fully recover, Lt. T.J. Cruz, Bell County spokesman, said Friday. Jones was allowed to go to the hospital with his daughter after the shooting because he was so upset after the incident, Cruz said. The father was watching his children in their grandparents home in the 5200 block of Indian Springs Road when the shooting happened. The children live with their grandparents, Cruz said. Childrens Protective Services is investigating the case and is involved with the family, Julie Moody, spokeswoman for the Texas Department of Family & Protective Services, said Monday. CPS has not removed the children, Moody said. Jones was arrested Friday afternoon after authorities received a tip he was in a parking lot near Michaels, 3550 General Bruce Drive in Temple. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Donna Re: Reimageplus infection Dear Webby I've run across this as has a neighbor...when accessing a perfectly "safe" website (as if there is such a thing) such as Kohls, or my local news channel, occasionally a red screen will pop up that says "you appear to have pop ups enabled" and it wants me to call a number to have Windows 10 "repaired". Of course I realize this is a scam and just close out of it....I HAVE Adblock running, I just wondered if you've heard of this before and have any idea what it is. My neighbor came running to me because he (stupidly) called the number and gave them access to his computer so gave him some advice about getting a virus program and running in safe mode, but I'm "fairly" sure I'm ok in that regard. Any thoughts? Donna Dear Donna If the neighbor gave them access to his computer, he might as well format it. He might be able to save some data, but it will be very risky. BBQ on high will be the safest. In your case, you can easily save your machine. You just have a malware infection. Reimageplus is a known malware infection. Get MalwareBytes from http://webby.com/malwarebytes and let it clean your machine. Have FUN! DearWebby Dear Webby YOU DA MAN, WEBBY! I downloaded the free version of Malwarebytes (good enough?) and found 37 baddies. Donna _____________________________________________________ There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby. The preacher went to the congregation and asked for a raise. After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's salary. There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church. Finally, the preacher got up and spoke to the crowd, "Having children is an act of God!" Silence fell on the congregation. In the back of the room, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Snow and rain are also acts of God, but when we get too much, we wear rubbers." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Blackberry Sauce By lalala... [732 Posts, 97 Comments] We are lucky to have blackberries growing everywhere around us. I recently picked 20 lbs. of them and decided to make this simple blackberry sauce to put on ice cream! sauce on ice cream Ingredients: blackberries, rinsed and dried 1-2 Tbsp corn starch 1/4 cup sugar Steps: Rinse and dry the blackberries. Remove any mushy ones. drying blackberries Put the blackberries into a large sauce pan, over MED heat. Stir in corn starch, mixing well. Heat the blackberries, stirring frequently. As they cook down, the sauce will begin to thicken. Cook until desired consistency. Add sugar, to taste. Allow to cool, then use as a topping on ice cream or anything that sounds good! ______________________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
_____________________________________________________ First golfer, Bill: "What was your score?" Bob: "Seventy-two." Bill: "That's not too bad at all!" Bob: "Thanks! I hope I'll do better on the second hole." ___________________________________________________ | Robin Williams on accents |
____________________________________________________ During the course of being interviewed by the press, the noted doctor was asked by a reporter: "Doctor, did you ever make a serious mistake?" "Yes, was the reply, "I sure did! I once cured a millionaire before he was broke!" ____________________________________________________ Did you know that..... Football was actually invented by a group of women, ...as a way to keep their husbands out of the kitchen on Thanksgiving! ____________________________________________________ | The floating in air bonsai trees are so calming to watch. |
| Today on March 8 1618 Johann Kepler discovered the third Law of Planetary Motion. 1702 England's Queen Anne took the throne upon the death of cKing William III. 1782 The Gnadenhutten massacre took place. About 90 Indians were killed by militiamen in Ohio in retaliation for raids carried out by other Indians. 1855 A train passed over the first railway suspension bridge at Niagara Falls, NY. 1862 The Confederate ironclad "Merrimack" was launched. 1880 U.S. President Rutherford B. Hayes declared that the United States would have jurisdiction over any canal built across the isthmus of Panama. 1887 The telescopic fishing rod was patented by Everett Horton. 1894 A dog license law was enacted in the state of New York. It was the first animal control law in the U.S. 1904 The Bundestag in Germany lifted the ban on the Jesuit order of priests. 1905 In Russia, it was reported that the peasant revolt was spreading to Georgia. 1907 The British House of Commons turned down a women's suffrage bill. 1909 Pope Pius X lifted the church ban on interfaith marriages in Hungary. 1910 In France, Baroness de Laroche became the first woman to obtain a pilot's license. 1910 The King of Spain authorized women to attend universities. 1911 In Europe, International Women's Day was celebrated for the first time. 1911 British Minister of Foreign Affairs Edward Gray declared that Britain would not support France in the event of a military conflict. 1917 Russia's "February Revolution" began with rioting and strikes in St. Petersburg. 1917 The U.S. Senate voted to limit filibusters by adopting the cloture rule. 1921 Spanish Premier Eduardo Dato was assassinated while leaving the Parliament in Madrid. 1921 French troops occupied Dusseldorf, Germany. 1933 Self-liquidating scrip money was issued for the first time at Franklin, IN. 1941 Martial law was proclaimed in Holland in order to extinguish any anti-Nazi protests. 1942 During World War II, Japanese forces captured Rangoon, Burma. 1943 Japanese forces attacked American troops on Hill 700 in Bougainville. The battle lasted five days. 1945 Phyllis Mae Daley received a commission in the U.S. Navy Nurse Corps. She later became the first African-American nurse to serve duty in World War II. 1946 In New York City, the "Journal American" became the first commercial business to receive a helicopter license. 1946 The French naval fleet arrived at Haiphong, Vietnam. 1948 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that religious instruction in public schools was unconstitutional. 1953 A census bureau report indicated that 239,000 farmers had quit farming over the last 2 years. 1954 France and Vietnam opened talks in Paris on a treaty to form the state of Indochina. 1959 Groucho, Chico and Harpo made their final TV appearance together. 1965 The U.S. landed about 3,500 Marines in South Vietnam. They were the first U.S. combat troops to land in Vietnam. 1966 Australia announced that it would triple the number of troops in Vietnam. 1973 Two bombs exploded near Trafalgar Square in Great Britain. 234 people were injured. 1982 The U.S. accused the Soviets of killing 3,000 Afghans with poison gas. 1985 The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) reported that 407,700 Americans were millionaires. That was more than double the total from just five years before. 1988 In Fort Campbell, KY, 17 U.S. soldiers were killed when two Army helicopters collided in midair. 1989 In Lhasa, Tibet, martial law was declared after three days of protest against Chinese rule. 1999 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the conviction of Timothy McVeigh for the bombing of a federal building in Oklahoma City in 1995. 1999 The White House, under President Bill Clinton, directed the firing of nuclear scientist Wen Ho Lee from his job at the Los Alamos National Laboratory. The firing was a result of alleged security violations. 2001 The U.S. House of Representatives voted for an across-the-board tax cut of nearly $1 trillion over the next decade. 2005 In norther Chechnya, Chechen rebel leader Aslan Maskhadov was killed during a raid by Russian forces. 2016 Do smiled. |
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