Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, December 3 If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Impaired driver smashes into, damages Sprague war memorial statue ____________________________________ Today, December 3 in 1999 The World Trade Organization (WTO) concluded a four-day meeting in Seattle, WA, without setting an agenda for a new round of trade talks. The meeting was met with fierce protests by various groups. who caused over $2 Billion worth of damage. The protesters did not know what they were protesting against ot for. _____________________________________________________ The little place I grew up in Texas the population never changed. Every time a gal had a baby a guy left town. --- Willy Nelson now 87 __________________________________________ When my sister's husband died, she went to the bank to put his affairs in order. The young clerk looked up their joint account and then asked, "Which of you is deceased?" _____________________________________________________ Come on out and play! James Seal ___________________________________________________ >From Rock: Cheese Farm Tour Overseas As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats milk was used. She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. "These", she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?" A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours." _______________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Tyler Gaudette, 27, Vernon, Connecticot, USA Impaired driver smashes into, damages Sprague war memorial statue A 27-year-old Vernon man is accused of crashing into and damaging a Sprague war memorial statue on Monday while driving impaired, according to a state police criminal summary. Police said Tyler Gaudette, of 130 Vernon Ave., was traveling west on Main Street/Route 97 in the village of Baltic when he failed to stop at a clearly posted stop sign at the intersection of West Main/Route 207. Gaudettes vehicle left the road when he tried to make a left-hand turn, traveling over a sidewalk, rock wall and through a granite bench before colliding with a bronze statue of a praying, female soldier paying homage to a fallen comrade in the Baltic villages War Memorial Park, police said. Police said the crash forced the damaged statue from its stone paving base and onto the grass. Gaudette, who was not injured, was later found with several controlled substance pills on his person and police said he was driving while under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol. Tyler Gaudette He was charged with driving while under the influence of drugs or alcohol, possession of a controlled substance/less than -ounce of cannabis, traveling too fast for conditions and failure to stop at a stop sign. He was initially held on a $1,500 bond and is due to appear on Dec. 17 in Norwich Superior Court. The statue, believed to be the first in the state to honor female combat veterans, was unveiled in November 2019 after the American Legion Post 85 spearheaded fundraising efforts for the project. Local businesses and community groups helped raise $50,000 for the statue. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Jeanne RE: Writing program Dear Webby, I am going to have to do a lot of writing, mostly history of me and my family. The problem is, I don't have the money for Microsoft Office or any other expensive programs. What do you use and recommend? Jeanne Dear Jeanne For the last 30 or 40 years I have used NoteTab. http://notetab.com So far I am using probably 10% of it's capabilities. You have a clipboard for frequently used stuff, and can have a whole bunch of files in tabs, just like browsers have nowadays. NoteTab is strictly for text, but with text it is extremely fast. If you have to add pictures, then I would recommend Open Office or Office Libre, which is pretty well the same as Microsoft office, except it is free. It has a WRITER (Like MS Office WORD). You can easily write a book with it, with illustrations. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ Real-Life Classified Ads ------------------------ 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00. For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy. Great Dames for sale. Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. ____________________________________________ A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher. The note read: "Bill Jones having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety." Failing to observe the punctuation, he startled his audience by announcing: "Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety." ____________________________________________ On a family vacation in Texas, my brother-in-law Mike exhibited the exuberance of a tourist. At a diner, he and his brothers ordered cheeseburgers. When his meal arrived, the first thing Mike noticed was its size. "Wow," he exclaimed, "everything is bigger in Texas!" As he lifted the burger to his lips, his eyes met the cold stare of a 300-pound waitress. _______________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today December 3 in 1792 The trial of France's King Louis XVI began. He was eventually put to death for 33 charges. 1833 Oberlin College in Ohio opened as the first truly coeducational school of higher education in the United States. 1835 In Rhode Island, the Manufacturer Mutual Fire Insurance Company issued the first fire insurance policy. 1910 The neon lamp was displayed for the first time at the Paris Motor Show. The lamp was developed by French physicist Georges Claude. 1917 The Quebec Bridge opened for traffic after almost 20 years of planning and construction. The bridge suffered partial collapses in 1907 (August 29) and 1916 (September 11). 1931 Alka Seltzer was sold for the first time. 1947 The Tennessee Williams play "A Streetcar Named Desire" opened at Broadway's Ethel Barrymore Theater. 1948 The "Pumpkin Papers" came to public light. The House Un- American Activities Committee announced that former Communist spy Whittaker Chambers had produced microfilm of secret documents hidden inside a pumpkin on his Maryland farm. 1967 In Cape Town, South Africa, a team of surgeons headed by Dr. Christian Barnard, performed the first human heart transplant on Louis Washkansky. Washkansky only lived 18 days. 1973 Pioneer 10 sent back the first close-up images of Jupiter. The first outer-planetary probe had been launched from Cape Canaveral, FL, on March 2, 1972. 1983 3-foot-high concrete barriers were installed at two White House entrances. 1984 In Bhopal, India, more than 2,000 people were killed after a cloud of poisonous gas escaped from a pesticide plant. The plant was operated by a Union Carbide subsidiary. 1992 The UN Security Council unanimously approved a U.S.-led military mission to help starving Somalians. 1992 The Greek tanker "Aegean Sea" ran aground at La Coruna, Spain and spilled 21.5 million gallons of crude oil. 1993 Britain's Princess Diana announced she would be limiting her public appearances because she was tired of the media's intrusions into her affairs. 1993 Angola's government and its rebel enemies agreed to a cease- fire in their 18-year war. 1994 Rebel Serbs in Bosnia failed to keep a pledge to release hundreds of UN peacekeepers. 1995 Former South Korean president Chun Doo-hwan was arrested for his role in a 1979 coup. 1997 In Ottawa, Canada, more than 120 countries were represented to sign a treaty prohibiting the use and production of anti- personnel land mines. The United States, China and Russia did not sign the treaty. 1997 South Korea received $55 billion from the International Monetary Fund to bailout its economy. 1999 Tori Murden became the first woman to row across the Atlantic Ocean alone. It took her 81 days to reach the French Caribbean island of Guadeloupe from the Canary Islands. 1999 The World Trade Organization (WTO) concluded a four-day meeting in Seattle, WA, without setting an agenda for a new round of trade talks. The meeting was met with fierce protests by various groups. who caused $2 Billion worth of damage. The protesters did not know what they were protesting against ot for. 1999 The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) lost radio contact with the Mars Polar Lander as it entered Mars' atmosphere. The spacecraft was unmanned. 2010 The Boeing X-37 returned to Earth after its first orbital mission. It launched on April 22, 2010. 2020 Do smiled. |
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