Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, March 5 Today's Bonehead Award: New York cop arrested for making and selling guns to outlaws. ______________________________________________________ Today, March 5 in 1934 In Amarillo, TX, the first Mother's-In-Law Day was celebrated. 1953 Soviet dictator Joseph Stalin died. He had been in power for 29 years. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. --- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A Veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the usual questions: what were the symptoms, how long had they been occurring, etc.. Suddenly, she interrupted him: "Hey look, I'm a vet - *I* don't need to ask my patients these kind of questions: I can tell what's wrong just by looking." She smugly added, "Why can't you?" The doctor nodded, stood back, looked her up and down, quickly wrote out a prescription, handed it to her and said, "There you are. Of course, if that doesn't work, we'll have to have you put to sleep." _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ While sports fishing off Melbourne Beach, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, "Are there any 'gators around here?!" "Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!" "Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy, "How'd you get rid of the 'gators?" "We didn't do nothin'," the beach bum said. "The sharks got 'em." ______________________________________________________ Sonora Borealis. Town in foreground is Tucson. _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Gregg Marinelli, 38, Plattekill, New York New York cop arrested for making and selling guns to outlaws. March 2 (UPI) -- A police officer in New York City has been accused of illegally making handguns and assault weapons, then selling them to criminals, N.Y. State Police said. Gregg Marinelli, 38, a sergeant with the city's Department of Environmental Protection Police, was arrested Thursday and charged with six felonies: criminal sale of a firearm, two counts of criminal possession of a weapon, manufacture/disposition of a weapon, conspiracy and hindering prosecution, the State Police said in a news release Friday. "This has to be one of the most egregious breaches of trust that I have encountered," Orange County District Attorney David Hoovler said, according to the Times Herald-Record. "I am furious. Number one, about the leak in the case; and number two, the conduct, the possibility of putting untraceable guns on the street." Marinelli is being held in Orange County Jail in lieu of bail, which was set at $200,000 cash or $600,000 bond by Deerpark Town Court. State Police and agents with the federal Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives found gun parts, tools used to make weapons and several firearms, including at least one fully automatic assault rifle, at his home in home in Plattekill in Ulster County, 75 miles north of New York City. Many of the weapons were "ghost" guns -- meaning they were manufactured without serial numbers. They were sold to outlaw motorcycle groups and other people with criminal convictions, who are barred from owning guns, troopers said. "I am enraged that a police officer would sell exactly the types of weapons that are used to kill innocent people, including police officers," Hoovler said. "The types of 'ghost' guns which were recovered in this case are valuable to criminals precisely because they are difficult to trace. A police officer who alerts an armed drug dealer who has proudly proclaimed his status as 'outlaw' motorcycle club member, that he is the subject of police investigation, not only compromises that investigation, but puts his fellow police officers at risk." Thirteen handguns and assault rifles were recovered from others. He's accused of allegedly delivering some of the illegal guns using his marked police car. "The alleged crimes betray the oath that this officer took to protect the public," said Adam Bosch, director of public affairs for the NYC Department of Environmental Protection Police. "DEP is fully cooperating in the investigation." The arrest of Marinelli is an off-shoot of a drug trafficking case in Orange and Rockland Counties that uncovered a cocaine- dealing motorcycle club and another operation that sold pills containing fentanyl. People who bought guns from the suspect are asked to turn them in. "Those who voluntarily surrender the weapons in this manner will not be prosecuted for their possession of the weapons, although they could be prosecuted for any crimes committed with the weapons," the State Police said. From: John Re: No response Dear DearWebby Is it possible to detect if Angelwinks is on the Recipient's blocked sender list? If it is on the blocked senders list, how do you deal with the blocked cards? Are they regarded as being "delivered" or would you send an "unable to deliver" note? I ask this because I have been sending cards and getting a very prompt reply saying that the recipient has picked up the card but have not received any reply from the Recipient. I look forward to hearing from you. John H Dear John If you get the "has picked up.." notice, then somebody at the recipient's machine, HAS indeed picked up and viewed your card. There is no way we can tell if the person who opened and viewed the card was the intended recipient, a spouse, parent, child, room mate, the butler or employer. All the program sees is that SOMEBODY at the recipient address opened and viewed the card. You will have to contact the recipient by chat or phone to find out why you got snubbed. It is also possible that YOU have the recipient blocked, and that she is getting mighty annoyed with you. So, contact her and find out! Have Fun! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said, "My son is such a saint. He works hard, doesn't smoke, and he hasn't so much as looked at a woman in over two years." The other woman said, "Well, my son is a saint himself. Not only hasn't he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn't touched a drop of liquor in all that time." "My word," the first mother said. "You must be so proud." "I am," the second mother replied. "And when he's paroled next month, I'm going to throw him one heck of a big party." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight. She'd made her family's favorite cake over the weekend, she reported, and they'd eaten half of it at dinner. The next day, she said, she kept staring at the other half, until finally she cut a thin slice for herself. One slice led to another, and soon the whole cake was gone. The woman went on to tell us how upset she was with her lack of willpower, and how she knew her husband would be disappointed. Everyone commiserated, until someone asked what her husband said when he found out. She smiled. "He never found out. I made another cake and ate half!" ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Breaking in a Baseball Glove The best way to break in a baseball glove is to use it. To speed up the process, apply a dab of shaving cream to the center of the glove and then put a baseball in the pocket. Secure the glove closed by tying a shoelace around the glove and put it between your mattresses overnight. Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ | | Richard Branson and a group of scientists make exciting discoveries inside Great Blue Hole. |
___________________________________________________ A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?" "No," the cook said. "Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of crisp bacon. "Oh, OK!" said the waitress. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer. The trucker asked, "What are the beans for?" She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!" ___________________________________________________ On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers." A little voice from the back of the room asked, "How is THAT going to help?" ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
Rick, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, "What is three times seven?" "22," Rick replied. After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he *knew* he should have taken it to the interview!) and realized he wouldn't get the job. About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious. The next day, he went in and asked why he got the job, even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, "Well, you were the closest." ___________________________________________________ | Today March 5 in 1623 The first alcohol temperance law in the colonies was enacted in Virginia. 1624 In the American colony of Virginia, the upper class was exempted from whipping by legislation. 1766 The first Spanish governor of Louisiana, Antonio de Ulloa, arrived in New Orleans. 1770 "The Boston Massacre" took place when British troops fired on a crowd in Boston killing five people. Two British troops were later convicted of manslaughter. 1793 Austrian troops defeated the French and recaptured Liege. 1836 Samuel Colt's Patent Arms Manufacturing of Paterson, New Jersey, was chartered by the New Jersey legislature. 1842 A Mexican force of over 500 men under Rafael Vasquez invaded Texas for the first time since the revolution. They briefly occupied San Antonio, but soon headed back to the Rio Grande. 1845 The U.S. Congress appropriated $30,000 to ship camels to the western U.S. 1867 An abortive Fenian uprising against English rule took place in Ireland. 1868 The U.S. Senate was organized into a court of impeachment to decide charges against President Andrew Johnson. 1872 George Westinghouse patented the air brake for trains. 1900 Two U.S. battleships left for Nicaragua to halt revolutionary disturbances. 1901 Germany and Britain began negotiations with hopes of creating an alliance. 1902 In France, the National Congress of Miners decided to call for a general strike for an 8-hour day. 1907 In St. Petersburg, Russia, the new Duma opened. 40,000 demonstrators were dispersed by troops. 1910 In Philadelphia, PA, 60,000 people left their jobs to show support for striking transit workers. 1910 The Moroccan envoy signed the 1909 agreement with France. 1912 The Italians became the first to use dirigibles for military purposes. They used them for reconnaissance flights behind Turkish lines west of Tripoli. 1918 The Soviets moved the capital of Russia from Petrograd to Moscow. 1922 "Annie Oakley" (Phoebe Ann Moses) broke all existing records for women's trap shooting. She hit 98 out of 100 targets. 1923 Old-age pension laws were enacted in the states of Montana and Nevada. 1933 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt ordered a four-day bank holiday in order to stop large amounts of money from being withdrawn from banks. 1933 The Nazi Party won 44 percent of the vote in German parliamentary elections. 1934 In Amarillo, TX, the first Mother's-In-Law Day was celebrated. 1943 Germany called fifteen- and sixteen-year-olds for military service due to war losses. 1946 Winston Churchill delivered his "Iron Curtain Speech". 1946 The U.S. sent protests to the U.S.S.R. on incursions into Manchuria and Iran. 1953 Soviet dictator Joseph Stalin died. He had been in power for 29 years. 1956 The U.S. Supreme Court affirmed the ban on segregation in public schools. 1970 A nuclear non-proliferation treaty went into effect after 43 nations ratified it. 1976 The British pound fell below the equivalent of $2 for the first time in history. 1984 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that cities had the right to display the Nativity scene as part of their Christmas display. 1984 The U.S. accused Iraq of using poison gas. 1985 Mike Bossy (New York Islanders) became the first National Hockey League player to score 50 goals in eight consecutive seasons. 1993 Cuban President Fidel Castro said that Hillary Clinton was "a beautiful woman." 1993 Sprinter Ben Johnson was banned from racing for life by the Amateur Athletic Association after testing positive for banned performance-enhancing substances for a second time. 1997 North Korea and South Korea met for first time in 25 years for peace talks. 1998 NASA announced that an orbiting craft had found enough water on the moon to support a human colony and rocket fueling station. 1998 It was announced that Air Force Lt. Col. Eileen Collins would lead crew of Columbia on a mission to launch a large X-ray telescope. She was the first woman to command a space shuttle mission. 2019 Do smiled. |
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