Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, February 10 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today, February 10, in 1992 Mike Tyson was convicted in Indianapolis of raping Desiree Washington, a Miss Black American contestant. ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Award Ohio man threatened and beat woman after crawling out of car trunk ___________________________________________________ The squeaking wheel doesn't always get the grease. Sometimes it gets replaced. --- Vic Gold ___________________________________________________ Quote for today: "The problems we face today are there because the people who work for a living are now outnumbered by those that vote for a living." ___________________________________________________ The homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house. "You did a great job," he said and handed the man a check. "Also, in order to thank you, here's an extra $80 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie." The painter thanked him and agreed to do that. Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter. Thinking the man had forgotten something he asked, "What's the matter, did you forget something?" "Nope," replied the painter. "I'm a man of my word. I'm here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like you asked." ____________________________________________________ sex c sass c Our Amazing Sunset Yesterday ____________________________________________________ A college senior took his new girlfriend to a football game. The young couple found seats in the crowded stadium and were watching the action. A substitute was put into the game, and as he was running onto the field to take his position, the boy said to his girlfriend, "Take a good look at that fellow. I expect him to be our best man next year." His girlfriend snuggled closer to him and said, "That's the strangest way I ever heard of for a fellow to propose to a girl. Regardless of how you said it, I accept!" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Jarrod Rodriguez, 40, HARRISON, Ohio, USA Ohio man threatened and beat woman after crawling out of car trunk An Ohio man is accused of hiding in the trunk of a womans vehicle, climbing out and threatening to kill her while she drove, according to court documents. Jarrod Rodriguez, 40, was charged with kidnapping, aggravated robbery, assault and aggravated menacing, WXIX-TV reported. Bail was set at $250,000. According to Hamilton County court documents filed Thursday and obtained by the television station, Rodriguez is the womans ex-boyfriend. The man climbed into the trunk of the victims unlocked car and waited for her. I was on my way to school and I got into my car and onto the highway, and he had hid in the hatchback. He was waiting for me, the woman told WXIX on Monday. He jumped in the front seat and started beating me. I didnt know he was in my car. The woman added that the couple had been fighting before they split up and that she was going to file a restraining order, the television station reported. According to court documents, Rodriguez struck the victim with a closed fist and threatened to kill her with a gun that he allegedly put to her face, WLWT-TV reported. Keeping the gun pointed to the victims side, Rodriguez allegedly ordered the victim to drive faster, directing her where to go and threatening that he would shoot her up with enough heroin to make her overdose, the television station reported, citing the affidavit. According to police, the victim pulled to the side of the road and exited her vehicle, WXIX reported. He attempted to force her back into the vehicle, and when unsuccessful, drove away, the television station reported. Several witnesses called 911, WLWT reported, and Rodriguez was subsequently arrested. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Olga Re: Alberta re-opening? Dear Webby You mentioned that Premier Kenney stopped the vaxport boohl sheet last night, but I was shopping today, and some shelves had huge gaps. When will the stores return to normal? Olga Dear Olga As you said, Kenney axed the Vaxport. That was provincial. The federal nuisances take more time. It does not help that Trudope Stalin is hiding in a bunker in Quebec. The trucks are still stuck at the border, but Kenney has not given up. One of our premiers proclaimed about 30 years ago:"Let the dumb bastids freeze in the dark!" to get the Trans Canada pipeline appproved. That worked. We still have that option, to shut down the TransCanada pipeline, and 4 trucks on the #1 (Trans Canada Highway) would shut down East-West traffic. Give it a few more days, and the fresh veggies should be appearing again. Kenney is NOT giving up! Have FUN! DearWebby Delighted by the gift she had received, the lady spoke warmly to the boy, "At church tomorrow, I'll thank your mother for this lovely pie." "If you don't mind, Ma'am," the boy suggested nervously, "would you please thank her for two pies?" | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ A flying saucer was low on fuel, so it landed near a local gas station. On its side were the letters "UFO." The gas station attendant was stunned, but his curiosity got the best of him. "Does that stand for Unidentified Flying Object?", he asked. "No," one of the other-worldly travelers responds. "It stands for 'Unleaded Fuel Only.' ______________________________________________ >Thanks to Sharon for this one: Dear Webby; Thanks for all the good clean jokes. Especially the church humor. I have one for you that I heard my pastor tell: A pastor told his congregation that he was going to do a 4 point message series over the next few weeks. Whatever word I end on", he told them, "I want you to sing a song that goes with that word". The 1st week the word was Rock. So the congregation sang "Rock of Ages". The 2nd week the word was Assurance. So they sang "Blessed Assurance". The 3rd week the word was Cross. They sang "At the Cross". The 4th week the word was sex. The congregation was baffled at what to sing. Finally an 85 yr old man stood up from the back of the church and started singing "Precious Memories". Try singing that song next time without laughing. Sharon=== ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anesthetic and had to bean him with the fire etinguisher." ___________________________________________________ | Today, February 10, in 1763 The Treaty of Paris ended the French and Indian War. In the treaty France ceded Canada to England. 1840 Britain's Queen Victoria married Prince Albert of Saxe Coburg-Gotha. 1846 Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints began their exodus to the west from Illinois. 1863 In New York City, two of the worlds most famous midgets, General Tom Thumb and Lavinia Warren were married. 1863 In Virginia, the first fire extinguisher patent was issued to Alanson Crane. 1870 The YWCA was founded in New York City. 1879 The electric arc light was used publicly for the first time. 1923 Ink paste was manufactured for the first time by the Standard Ink Company. 1925 The first waterless gas storage tank was placed in service in Michigan City, IN. 1933 The singing telegram was introduced by the Postal Telegraph Company of New York City. 1933 Primo Carnera knocked out Ernie Schaaf in round 13 at Madison Square Garden in New York City. Schaaf died as a result of the knockout punch. 1934 The first imperforated, ungummed sheets of postage stamps were issued by the U.S. Postal Service in New York City. 1935 The Pennsylvania Railroad began passenger service with its electric locomotive. The engine was 79-1/2 feet long and weighed 230 tons. 1942 The Normandie, the former French liner, capsized in New York Harbor. The day before the ship had caught fire while it was being fitted for the U.S. Navy. 1962 The Soviet Union exchanged captured American U2 pilot Francis Gary Powers for the Soviet spy Rudolph Ivanovich Abel being held by the U.S. 1967 The 25th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified. The amendment required the appointment of a vice- president when that office became vacant and instituted new measures in the event of presidential disability. 1975 The U.S. Post Office issued a commemorative stamp that featured NASA's Pioneer 10 spacecraft. 1981 The Las Vegas Hilton hotel-casino caught fire. Eight people were killed and 198 were injured. 1989 Ron Brown became the first African American to head a major U.S. political party when he was elected chairman of the Democratic National Committee. 1990 South African President F.W. de Klerk announced that black activist Nelson Mandela would be released the next day after 27 years in captivity. 1992 Mike Tyson was convicted in Indianapolis of raping Desiree Washington, a Miss Black American contestant. 1997 The U.S. Army suspended its top-ranking enlisted soldier, Army Sgt. Major Gene McKinney following allegations of sexual misconduct. McKinney was convicted of obstruction of justice and acquitted of 18 counts alleging sexual harassment of six military women. 1998 A man became the first to be convicted of committing a hate crime in cyberspace. The college dropout had e-mailed threats to Asian students. 1998 Voters in Maine repealed a 1997 gay rights law. Maine was the first state to abandone such legislation. 1999 Avalanches killed at least 10 people when they roared down the French Alps 30 miles from Geneva. 2005 North Korea publicly announced for the first time that it had nuclear arms. The country also rejected attempts to restart disarmament talks in the near future saying that it needed the weapons as protection against an increasingly hostile United States. 2009 A Russian and an American satellite collide over Siberia. 2009 Amazon announced the Kindle 2. 2021 Do smiled. |
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