Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, November 8 Here is a domain name you can use! 4mylove.com You can buy that domain name for $50 Have FUN! Dearwebby Today's Bonehead Award:   To avoid death penalty, man admits killing pregnant wife and two daughters  ______________________________________________________ Today, November 8 in 1895 Wilhelm Roentgen while experimenting with electricity discovered the scientific principle involved and took the first X-ray pictures. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ 
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 Every nation ridicules other nations, and all are right. --- Arthur Schopenhauer (1788 - 1860) ______________________________________________________ The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Do, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?" "No sir," Do replies, "I don't have to. My Mom is a pretty good cook." ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ The Jewish Chronicle had heard that Benny was coming up to his 110th birthday so they sent one of their reporters to interview him. "How do you account for your longevity?" asked the reporter. "You could say that I am a health nut," Benny answered. "I have never smoked or drunk alcohol, I am always in bed by ten o'clock, I've been going to Israeli folk dance classes since I was a teenager and I've always walked three miles a day, even in rain or snow." "But," said the reporter, "my uncle Saul followed exactly the same routine and he died when he was 75. So how come it didn't work for him?" "All I can say," replied Benny "is that he didn't keep it up long enough." _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________ Pastor Dave Charlton tells us, "After a worship service at First Baptist Church in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a fidgety seven-year old boy told me how she finally got her son to sit still and be quiet. About halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered, 'If you don't be quiet, Pastor Charlton is going to lose his place and will have to start his sermon all over again!' It worked." ______________________________________________________   She does not like Celine sounding like a cat in the washing machine. _____________________________________________________ 
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 ___________________________________________________   An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Chris Watts, 33, Greeley, Colorado  To avoid death penalty, man admits killing pregnant wife and two daughters  Chris Watts, 33, had claimed he saw his wife murdering Bella, 4, and Celeste, 3, on a baby monitor, then went into a rage and strangled his wife Shannan, who was 15 weeks pregnant. He pleaded guilty today under a plea deal allowing him to avoid the death penalty but putting him in jail for life without a chance of parole. After he killed his family, Watts hid the bodies of his daughters in an oil tank where he worked to hide the smell of their decaying bodies, and buried his wife in a shallow grave. One of Shannan's friends became concerned about her whereabouts after not hearing from her for several days after August 13 and contacted police. Watts was arrested on August 16 after making a TV appeal for information about the whereabouts of his missing family. He said their disappearance had left him 'torn up inside' and appealed for 'everybody to just come home.' Shanann Watts' family members 'were very strongly in favor of a resolution in this case short of the death penalty,' Weld County District Attorney Michael Rourke said. He recalled her mother, Sandra, saying Christopher Watts 'made the choice' to take the lives of his family members. 'I do not want to be in the position of making the choice to take his,' Rourke said, quoting Sandra. 'That's about as firmly as she could have said it to me.' Watts' voice was shaking, and he could occasionally be heard sniffing after each time he said 'guilty.' The agreement also required Watts to plead guilty to unlawful termination of Shanann Watts' pregnancy, a felony in Colorado. Family members have said she planned to name the boy Nico. The deal also ensures that Watts, who is 33, will consecutively serve each sentence for that charge and the murders of his wife and daughters. Rourke said Tuesday that investigators never believed that Watts was being entirely truthful. 'The spotlight that he tried to shine on Shanann falsely, incorrectly and frankly a flat-out lie has been corrected,' Rourke said. 'The spotlight shines directly where it belongs: On him.'  From: DW Re: Chrome crashing  Dear Webby My Chrome browser keeps crashing, locking up, playing stoopid. How can I fix that? DW  Dear DW, You probably use the "Honey" extension, that checks net wide for better deals. That works great, when you are on legitimate shopping sites, however, if you are on hysterically fanatic liberal sites like FaceBook or MSN, their censoring and excessive ads get into a pissing contest with Chrome, and Chrome loses. Just disable "Honey" and everything will work fine. Just enable it when you are actually shopping. It will usually save you 5 - 25% of the price. So far they have never sent me to a bad site, You don'y have to remove "Honey". Just disable it until you actually need it. Have FUN! DearWebby  
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 Here is a list of some of the dumbest questions asked by tourists at Alberta's Banff National Park. Yes, they are all allegedly true, as heard at the information kiosks manned by Parks Canada staff. [with my comment in brackets] 1. How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the "Elk Crossing" signs? [They just do] 2. At what elevation does an elk become a moose? [6 feet] 3. Tourist: "How do you pronounce 'Elk'?" Park information staff: "Elk." Tourist: "Oh." [Actually it is pronounced "Elk!] 4. Are the bears with collars tame? [Yes...take one home they make lovely pets!] 5. Is there anywhere I can see the bears pose? [Just before they eat you!] 6. Is it okay to keep an open bag of bacon on the picnic table, or should I store it in my tent? [Your sleeping bag or underwear is a much better place for it!] 7. Where can I find Alpine Flamingoes? [Just to the left there... see them?] 8. I saw an animal on the way to Banff today. Could you tell me what it was? [Yes] 9. Are there birds in Canada? [Are there brains in your head?] 10. Did I miss the turnoff for Canada? [Hopefully!] 11. Where does Alberta end and Canada begin? [Right there!] 12. Do you have a map of the State of Jasper? [You are with a travel group right? I would hate for you to get lost in our fine country!] 13. Is this the part of Canada that speaks French, or is that Saskatchewan? [no that would be Quebec!] 14. If I go to BC, do I have to go through Ontario? [Only if you are on a round-the-world tour!] 15. Which is the way to the Columbia Rice Fields? [Try China!] 16. How far is Banff from Canada? [Very far!] 17. What's the best way to see Canada in a day? [Space Shuttle!] 18. Do they search you at the BC border? [If you ask them nicely!] 19. When we enter BC, do we have to convert our money to British pounds? [They are using the Yen now!] 20. Where can I buy a raccoon hat? All Canadians own one, don't they? [Sure do...and we all own red "mountie" suits too!] 21. Are there phones in Banff? [No...it is Canada's only official phone-free location!] 22. So it's eight kilometres away. Is that in miles? [no..in fathoms!] 23. We're on the decibel system you know. [Really...so convert a 69 for me!] 24. Where can I get my husband really, REALLY, lost? [Spread your legs!] 25. Is that two kilometres by foot or by car? [Yes!] 26. Don't you Canadians know anything? [Oh boy...watch out for that tree!] 27. Where do you put the animals at night? [In your car!] 28. Tourist: "How do you get your lakes so blue?" Park staff: "We take the water out in the winter and paint the bottom." Tourist: "Oh." [And we paint the trees green too!] And then there is the mating call of the bluehaired Winnebegans: "An juss haw much es that en reel mohney?" [Just double it and round it down. That's close enough.] 
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 The fourth-grade teacher had to leave the room for a few minutes. When she returned, she found the children in perfect order. Everybody was sitting absolutely quiet. She was shocked and stunned and said, "I've never seen anything like it before. This is wonderful. But, please tell me, what came over all of you? Why are you so well-behaved and quiet?" Finally, after much urging, a little girl said, "Well, one time you said that if you ever came back and found us quiet, you would drop dead!!" ___________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Grow a Natural Christmas Tree Consider a potted tree instead of a cut one. It will save you money every year and it will grow with you and your family. Keep an eye on your tree's health while it is inside. It should only be inside for 10 to 14 days.  Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com  ____________________________________________________   
 
 
The Amazing 'Needle Painting' of Vera Shimunia 
 ___________________________________________________ There was a large revival meeting on the outskirts of town, and at the appropriate corner there was a large sign proclaiming...."If you are weary of sin and want to be saved, turn here, go 100 yards, and come into the revival tent." Below the sign someone had hung another smaller one...."If NOT weary, call Sherry 555-3550." ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue... and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go? ------------- your hips!  
 Today November 8 in 1793 The Louvre Museum, in Paris, opened to the public for the first time. 1805 The "Corps of Discovery" reached the Pacific Ocean. The expedition was led by William Clark and Meriwether Lewis. The journey had begun on May 14, 1804, with the goal of exploring the Louisiana Purchase territory. 1895 Wilhelm Roentgen while experimenting with electricity discovered the scientific principle involved and took the first X-ray pictures. 1910 William H. Frost patented the insect exterminator. 1923 Adolf Hitler made his first attempt at seizing power in Germany with a failed coup in Munich that came to be known as the "Beer-Hall Putsch." 1933 The Civil Works Administration was created by executive order by U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt. The organization was designed to create jobs for more than 4 million unemployed people in the U.S. 1942 The U.S. invaded Morocco and Algeria. 1942 During World War II, Operation Torch began as U.S. and British forces landed in French North Africa. 1950 During the Korean conflict, the first jet-plane battle took place as U.S. Air Force Lt. Russell J. Brown shot down a North Korean MiG-15. 1956 After turning down 18,000 names, the Ford Motor Company decided to name their new car the "Edsel," after Henry Ford's only son. 1966 Ronald Reagan was elected governor of California. 1979 The program, "The Iran Crisis: America Held Hostage", premiered on ABC-TV. The show was planned to be temporary, but it evolved into "Nightline" in March of 1980. 1980 Scientists at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in California announced that they had discovered a 15th moon orbiting the planet Saturn. 1981 Egyptian President Hosni Mubarek asserted that Egypt was "an African State" that was "neither East nor West". 1985 A letter signed by four American hostages in Lebanon was delivered to The Associated Press in Beirut. The letter, contained pleas from Terry Anderson, Rev. Lawrence Jenco, David Jacobsen and Thomas Sutherland to President Reagan to negotiate a release. 1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush ordered more troop deployments in the Persian Gulf, adding about 150,000 soldiers to the multi-national force fighting against Iraq. 1991 The European Community and Canada imposed economic sanctions on Yugoslavia in an attempt to stop the Balkan civil war. 1992 About 350,000 people rallied in Berlin against racist violence. 1993 Five Picasso paintings and other artwork were stolen from the Museum of Modern Art in Stockholm, Sweden. The works were valued at $52 million. 1997 Chinese engineers diverted the Yangtze River to make way for the Three Gorges Dam. 2000 In Florida, a statewide recount began to decide the winner of the 2000 U.S. presidential election. 2000 Waco special counsel John C. Danforth released his final report that absolved the government of wrongdoing in the 1993 siege of the Branch Davidian compound in Texas. 2018 Do smiled. 
 

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