Good Morning, Do, Today is Saturday, December 3 Have FUN! DearWebby Todays Bonehead Award: Tampa woman, fleeing after hit-and-run accident, crashes car into home, charged with DUI, again. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, December 3 in 1910 The neon lamp was displayed for the first time at the Paris Motor Show. The lamp was developed by French physicist Georges Claude. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ "Grandma, when you and Grandpa had your first baby, did Grandpa ever handle the middle-of-the-night feeding?" "No. I always did that." "That must have been before you had women's liberation." "No, it was before we had baby bottles." ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Betty-Sue passed out and Bubba, her husband, called 911. The operator said they would send someone out right away and asked, "Where do you live?" Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" There was a long pause and finally, Bubba said, "How about I drag her over to Oak Street and you can meet us there?" ______________________________________________________ A lady was driving from her husband's office to the kids' school, with twelve youngsters in the car, when she blew past a red light, and a police car. Much to the delight of the kids, the police officer pulled her over, wrote her a ticket, lectured her on traffic safety, and finished by saying, "Lady, don't you know when to stop?" Tomato red in the cheeks, the embarrassed woman said, "Officer, only seven of them are mine!" ______________________________________________________ As part of the admission procedure in the hospital where Jill work, she asks the patients if they are allergic to anything. If they are, she prints it on an allergy band placed on the patient's wrists. Once when she asked an elderly woman if she had any allergies, she said she couldn't eat bananas. Imagine Jill's surprise, when several hours later a very irate son came out to the nurses' station screaming: "Who's responsible for labeling my mother 'bananas'?" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Danica Eleen Zagara, 52, Tampa, Florida Tampa woman, fleeing after hit-and-run accident, crashes car into home, charged with DUI, again. On her way home from a bar, a Tampa woman left the scene of a car crash and then drove her car into a home Friday night, authorities reported. The incident marks the third time Danica Eleen Zagara, 52, of Tampa, has been charged with driving under the influence. She was also charged with driving under the influence with property damage in Friday's crash. There was no mention of her Hit-and-Run. Hillsborough County Sheriff's Deputies received a call about 8 p.m. Friday that Zagara had driven her blue 2002 Dodge Intrepid into a living room at 12015 N Oregon Ave. in the neighborhood of North Forest Hills. The resident was not home. Deputies administered first aid to Zagara and spoke with a witness, who said he had followed her after she left the scene of a hit and run crash at Fowler and Florida avenues. Zagara, of 504 El Sereno Place, told deputies she had just left Copper Top Pub and was on her way home. She was released from Orient Road Jail on Saturday on $2,250 bond. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Art RE: How to make my own icons Dear Webby, Dear Webby How do i make my own icons without buying any programns? You had something about that a few years ago, but at the time I didn't need extra icons. Art Dear Art I will show you how to do it with just the built in programs. It is still the same as it has been since Windows 2. Make a folder for your icons in a reasonably easy to find spot. Yes, I know, the default would be in some totally insane location, that you can never find again. Ignore that and find the C: drive, C:\ and in that make the folder, so it is at C:\icons Find a picture that is suitable or paint one. It should have LOTS of contrast and few colors. You can use the built in Microsoft Paint. It is crude and simple, but has been included with DOS and Windows since the stone age. It still works. START paint An ideal icon is for example the icon for FileZilla, the best FTP program available. It is simply a dark red background with a white Fz on it. It really sticks out from among herds of cutesy icons. Once you have a suitable picture, resize it down to 64 x 64. Then save it as a BMP file. Yes, BMP. I know, BMP does not work on the web, but you are making an icon for your computer, not the web. So save it as for example Inlaws.bmp into your icons folder. Then close PAINT, unless you have to make a bunch more. When you got all your icons painted and resized, close PAINT. Open the File Explorer RIGHT-click START Open Windows Explorer Find your C:\icons folder and be glad it is not deep down in the mess. In the icons folder, find inlaws.bmp, highlight it until the name becomes editable, and change it to inlaws.ico Ignore the warning. Now you can go to the program or bat on the desktop, that needs the new icon. Right-click it, properties, change icon browse to c:\icons and select inlaws.ico Done! That is all there is to it. You can, of course, use any other paint or graphics program too, as long as it lets you save the picture as .BMP Once upon a time we had just .GIF for the coarse and limited stuff and .BMP for higher resolution. In the days when Digital cameras used 360 KB floppies for storage, we had to be very careful with file size. We had a choice of 1 picture in BMP or 36 pictures in GIF. And lug around a shoe box full of floppies on all trips. Around that time Windows got created, and they decided to use .BMP for really cutesy icons, instead of .GIF for high visibility. Buncha Yuppies! We have been stuck with that ever since. Other than the icons, .BMP has become extinct and is no longer in use. Have FUN! DearWebby While the US stock market is at an all time high, the ups and downs frighten a lot of small investors. Bob went to his financial advisor at the bank and ask if he were worried. He replied that he slept like a baby. Bob was amazed and asked, "Really ??? Even with all the fluctuations?" He said, "Yes. I sleep for a couple of hours, then wake up and cry for a couple of hours." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Recipe: Mama Sue's Sausage Stew By StellaBell [187 Posts, 176 Comments] Sausage stew is a delicious and easy meal to throw together. It can be made on the stove, in a crockpot or in the oven. As a kid, we ate this meal several times a month. It is one of my favorite comfort foods as an adult. My siblings and I all have slightly different variations of our mom's recipe, this is my version. Ingredients: 1 polska kielbasa (I use turkey kielbasa for a healthy substitute) 1 lb carrots (I use baby carrots to make prepping easier) 2-3 Yukon Gold potatoes 1 large yellow onion 5-6 cloves of garlic, chopped fresh parsley 2-3 celery stalks (optional) 1 1/2 Tbsp Worcestershire sauce salt and pepper 1 tsp Italian seasoning Steps: Cut the sausage into 1/2 inch pieces. Brown the sausage on each side and set aside. Chop the onion and garlic. Cut the potatoes into 1 inch pieces. If using regular sized carrots cut into 1 inch rounds. If using baby carrots, leave whole. In the same pan that you browned the sausage in, sautee the onions until golden brown. Then add the garlic and sautee for a minute. Then add the potatoes and carrots. Add the worcestershire sauce, italian seasoning, salt, and pepper. Cover with a lid and simmer for about 15 minutes. Once the veggies have softened, add the sausage back in and cook for another minute or two, until the sausage is warmed. Serve with garlic bread. ____________________________________________________ A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the granny behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "PULL----OVER!" "NO!" the granny yelled back, "SCARF!" ____________________________________________________ | | If you've had a stressful day, watch this nature video with beautiful scenery and soothing music. |
>From Bob Have you ever worked in an office where someone insisted upon listening to their voice mail using the speakerphone (at full volume, naturally). It can really begin to bother you after a while.I found a fairly easy fix for that, though. I have a young lady call his desk when he's not there and leave a message like "Hi, this is Candy from 1-900-HOT-BABE. You haven't paid for the 'toys' we sent you, you naughty boy. You wouldn't want me to come over there and spank you, would you?" It is the last time you hear that particular speakerphone, I can assure you. Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
____________________________________________________ | Today on December 3 1792 The trial of France's King Louis XVI began. He was eventually put to death for the 33 charges. 1833 Oberlin College in Ohio opened as the first truly coeducational school of higher education in the United States. 1835 In Rhode Island, the Manufacturer Mutual Fire Insurance Company issued the first fire insurance policy. 1910 The neon lamp was displayed for the first time at the Paris Motor Show. The lamp was developed by French physicist Georges Claude. 1917 The Quebec Bridge opened for traffic after almost 20 years of planning and construction. The bridge suffered partial collapses in 1907 (August 29) and 1916 (September 11). 1931 Alka Seltzer was sold for the first time. 1947 The Tennessee Williams play "A Streetcar Named Desire" opened at Broadway's Ethel Barrymore Theater. 1948 The "Pumpkin Papers" came to public light. The House Un- American Activities Committee announced that former Communist spy Whittaker Chambers had produced microfilm of secret documents hidden inside a pumpkin on his Maryland farm. 1967 In Cape Town, South Africa, a team of surgeons headed by Dr. Christian Barnard, performed the first human heart transplant on Louis Washkansky. Washkansky only lived 18 days. 1967 The famed luxury train, "20th Century Limited," completed its final run from New York to Chicago. 1973 Pioneer 10 sent back the first close-up images of Jupiter. The first outer-planetary probe had been launched from Cape Canaveral, FL, on March 2, 1972. 1982 Doctors at the University of Utah Medical Center removed the respirator of Barney Clark. The retired dentist had become the world's first recipient of a permanent artificial heart only one day before. 1983 3-foot-high concrete barriers were installed at two White House entrances. 1984 In Bhopal, India, more than 2,000 people were killed after a cloud of poisonous gas escaped from a pesticide plant. The plant was operated by a Union Carbide subsidiary. 1992 The UN Security Council unanimously approved a U.S.-led military mission to help starving Somalians. 1992 The Greek tanker "Aegean Sea" ran aground at La Coruna, Spain and spilled 21.5 million gallons of crude oil. 1993 Britain's Princess Diana announced she would be limiting her public appearances because she was tired of the media's intrusions into her life. 1993 Angola's government and its rebel enemies agreed to a cease-fire in their 18-year war. 1994 Rebel Serbs in Bosnia failed to keep a pledge to release hundreds of UN peacekeepers. 1995 Former South Korean president Chun Doo-hwan was arrested for his role in a 1979 coup. 1997 In Ottawa, Canada, more than 120 countries were represented to sign a treaty prohibiting the use and production of anti-personnel land mines. The United States, China and Russia did not sign the treaty. 1997 South Korea received $55 billion from the International Monetary Fund to bailout its economy. 1999 Tori Murden became the first woman to row across the Atlantic Ocean alone. It took her 81 days to reach the French Caribbean island of Guadeloupe from the Canary Islands. 1999 The World Trade Organization (WTO) concluded a four-day meeting in Seattle, WA, without setting an agenda for a new round of trade talks. The meeting was met with fierce protests by various groups who did over a Billion dollars worth of damage without having a clue what the WTO was about. 1999 The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) lost radio contact with the Mars Polar Lander as it entered Mars' atmosphere. The spacecraft was unmanned. 2010 The Boeing X-37 returned to Earth on successfully after its first orbital mission. It launched on April 22, 2010. 2016 Do smiled. |
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