Good Morning, Do, Today is Friday, March 17 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! Happy St Patrick Day! Have FUN! DearWebby Todays Bonehead Award: Daycare worker pushes 4 year old girl to fall down the stairs, then she sees the new security camera. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, March 16 in 1884 In Otay, California, John Joseph Montgomery made the first manned, controlled, heavier-than-air glider flight in the United States. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. --- Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988) Virtue is choked with foul ambition. --- William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616), ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A real estate salesman had just closed his first deal, only to discover that the piece of land he had sold was completely under water. "That customer's going to come back here pretty mad," he said to his boss. "Should I give him his money back?" "Money back?" roared the boss. "What kind of salesman are you? Get out there and sell him a houseboat." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Do was hunched over the bar, toothpick in hand, spearing futilely at the olive in the drink. A dozen times the olive bounced away. Finally, another patron, who had been watching intently from the next stool, became exasperated and grabbed the toothpick. "Here, this is how you do it." he said, as he easily skewered the olive. "Big Deal," Do muttered. "I already had him so tired out, he couldn't get away." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Sarah Gable, 52, Delaware Country, Pennsylvania Daycare worker pushes 4 year old girl to fall down the stairs, then she sees the new security camera. Sarah Gable had been an employee of Childcare of the Future in Delaware Country, Pennsylvania for about a year. Before that, the 52-year-old had a long career, working at least 25 years in childcare. However, as ABC 6 reports, she was fired from her latest job on March 3. Shawayne Tavares, the daycare's administrator, was monitoring the center's newly installed security camera when she watched Gable push four-year-old Alayah Humphrey down the steps. The video shows Gable walking down the steps to help Humphrey back on her feet, before looking directly into the camera. The security camera had just been installed before the incident took place. Tavares told CBS Philly that as soon as she saw the incident occur, she confronted Gable: I said, What are you doing? We dont do this to children. Once the police were notified, Gable was fired, arrested and charged with simple assault and child endangerment. Neither Gable nor her attorney have commented on the incident. She was released from jail on a $25,000 secured bond. A motive as to why she pushed Humphrey down the stairs is not yet known. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Corey Re: GIF versus JPG Dear Webby What's better, GIF or JPG ? JPG pictures look a lot better, but now I was told to always make all catalog pictures in GIF format. What is the reason for that? Corey /i> GIF has a color depth of 256. Believe it or not, at one time that was drool-slobber far out, compared to 16 colors. JPG can show up to 16 MILLION colors, and JPG pictures can easily be compressed. If you don't compress them too much, JPG pictures look nicer. However, the compression is "lossy" and can not be reversed. Every time you save an edit, you wash out more color depth and eventually wind up with a washed out and very bland picture. In addition to that, JPG pictures grow coronas and accumulate fuzz. Never edit in JPG format. Use PSP or PNG format for editing, and save to JPG format just before uploading. Oldfashioned GIF does have several advantages. One is that GIF pictures don't degrade. Another is that you can use transparent sections that are reliably transparent on all browsers and all viewers. And you can make animations that work predictably. The reason that GIF is the favorite for catalog makers is because of the ability to make transparencies. You can make the background transparent and the item appear to float on the page. Have FUN! DearWebby Someone in our neighborhood put a huge sofa out by the curb for trash collection. Since it was in good shape, many motorists slowed down for a look. But when they saw how enormous it was, they'd leave. Eventually a compact car pulled up, and two men got out. "This I've got to see," I thought. They removed the cushions, turned the sofa upside down, and shook it hard. Then they picked up all the coins that tumbled out and drove off. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Soot From Candle Jars By guest (Guest Post) Best Answer The absolute easiest way to clean the soot from a candle jar is to wipe a dry used fabric softener sheet on the glass. This tip was posted on ThriftyFun and I have had fantastic results. Now we don't toss the used fabric softener sheets! | | so you want to take a cruise? |
____________________________________________________ A few women were sitting around the table talking, and the subject turned to their husbands. One lady said, "My husband just won't go to church with me, I think he's going to go to Hell." This led to talk around the table and it was generally agreed that, for one reason or another, all the husbands were going to end up in Hell. So, then the housewives started speculating about themselves. One woman said, "I try to be good - I'm sure I'll make it to Heaven." Another one said "No, I did this bad thing, I won't make it unless I mend my ways, I better start soon." At this point they noticed that one of the ladies (the only single women in the group, and a blonde, mind you) wasn't saying anything. They turned to her and said, "You're such a nice lady, surely you'll be going to Heaven?" She says, "No way! In fact, first thing in the morning, I'm going to buy me a ticket straight to Hell!" They were shocked and asked, "Why??" "Well, you don't expect me to live in a world without men, do you??!?" ___________________________________________________ | | Very pretty glass blown animal sculptures. |
A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don't want to go out there. It's dark." The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don't have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He'll look after you and protect you." The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure he's out there?" "Yes, I'm sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him," she said. The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called, "Jesus? If you're out there, would you please hand me the broom?" Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
____________________________________________________ | Today on March 17 0461 Bishop Patrick, St. Patrick, died in Saul. Ireland celebrates this day in his honor. 1756 St. Patrick's Day was celebrated in New York City for the first time. The event took place at the Crown and Thistle Tavern. 1766 Britain repealed the Stamp Act that had caused resentment in the North American colonies. 1776 British forces evacuated Boston and fled to Nova Scotia during the Revolutionary War. 1868 Postage stamp canceling machine patent was issued. 1884 In Otay, California, John Joseph Montgomery made the first manned, controlled, heavier-than-air glider flight in the United States. 1886 20 Blacks were killed in the Carrollton Massacre in Mississippi. 1891 The British steamer Utopia sank off the coast of Gibraltar. 1901 In Paris, Vincent Van Gogh's paintings were shown at the Bernheim Gallery. 1909 In France, the communications industry was paralyzed by strikes. 1910 The Camp Fire Girls organization was founded by Luther and Charlotte Gulick. It was formally presented to the public exactly 2 years later. 1914 Russia increased the number of active duty military from 460,000 to 1,700,000. 1930 Al Capone was released from jail. 1930 In New York, construction began on the Empire State Building. Excavation at the site began on January 22. 1942 Douglas MacArthur became the Supreme Commander of the Allied forces in the Southwestern Pacific. 1944 During World War II, the U.S. bombed Vienna back into the stone age. 1950 Scientists at the University of California at Berkeley announced that they had created a new radioactive element. They named it "californium". It is also known as element 98. 1958 The Vanguard 1 satellite was launched by the U.S. 1959 The Dalai Lama (Lhama Dhondrub, Tenzin Gyatso) fled Tibet and went to India. 1961 The U.S. increased military aid and technicians to Laos. 1962 Moscow asked the U.S. to pull out of South Vietnam. 1966 A U.S. submarine found a missing H-bomb in the Mediterranean off of Spain. 1969 Golda Meir was sworn in as the fourth premier of Israel. 1970 The U.S. Army charged 14 officers with suppression of facts in the My Lai massacre case. 1972 U.S. President Nixon asked Congress to halt busing in order to achieve desegregation. 1973 Twenty were killed in Cambodia when a bomb went off that was meant for the Cambodian President Lon Nol. 1973 The first American prisoners of war (POWs) were released from the "Hanoi Hilton" in Hanoi, North Vietnam. 1982 In El Salvador, four Dutch television crewmembers were killed by government troops. 1985 U.S. President Reagan agreed to a joint study with Canada on acid rain. 1989 A series of solar flares caused a violent magnetic storm that brought power outages over large regions of Canada. 1992 In Buenos Aires, 10 people were killed in a suicide car-bomb attack against the Israeli embassy. 1992 White South Africans approved constitutional reforms to give legal equality to blacks. 1995 Gerry Adams became the first leader of Sinn Fein to be received at the White House. 1998 Washington Mutual announced it had agreed to buy H.F. Ahmanson and Co. for $9.9 billion dollars. The deal created the nation's seventh-largest banking company. 1999 A panel of medical experts concluded that marijuana had medical benefits for people suffering from cancer and AIDS. 1999 The International Olympic Committee expelled six of its members in the wake of a bribery scandal. 2000 In Norway, Jens Stotenberg and the Labour Party took office as Prime Minister. The coalition government of Kjell Magne Bondevik resigned on March 9 as a result of an environmental dispute. 2000 In Kanungu, Uganda, a fire at a church linked to the cult known as the Movement for the Restoration of the Ten Commandments killed more than 530. On March 31, officials set the number of deaths linked to the cult at more than 900 after authorities subsequently found mass graves at various sites linked to the cult. 2004 NASA's Messenger became the first spacecraft to enter into orbit around Mercury. The probe took more than 270,000 pictures before it crashed into the surface of Mercury on April 30, 2015. 2007 Mike Modano (Dallas Stars) scored his 502nd and 503rd career goals making him the all-time U.S. leader in goal- scoring. 2009 The iTunes Music Store reached 800 million applications downloaded. 2017 Do smiled. |
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