s
Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, October 12 ___________________________________________________ History on this day, October 12, in 1810, Bavarian Crown Prince Ludwig married Princess Therese of Saxony-Hildburghausen. The royalty invited the public to attend the event which became an annual celebration that later became known as Oktoberfest. ____________________________________________________ international bonehead award Delray Beach Counselor Charged With Drug Possession, Sale ____________________________________________________ The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. --- Lucille Ball (1911 - 1989) Wisdom doesn't automatically come with old age. Nothing does - except wrinkles. It's true, some wines improve with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place. --- Abigail Van Buren (1918 - 1978 ___________________________________________________ After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT monfter?" ____________________________________________________ Steinberg and Greenbaum, partners in the garment industry had just suffered through their worst season ever. Ten thousand madras sports coats were hanging on the rack unsold, and bankruptcy was looming closer. Out of the blue, in walked a buyer from Australia. "I say there," he began, "you boys wouldn't have any madras sports coats, would you? I've been looking for them everywhere." Steinberg said there MIGHT be a few left, and soon a deal was made whereby the ten thousand jackets would be shipped to Australia at a handsome profit. "There is one thing though," said the Australian buyer. "For an order this large, I'll have to get a confirmation from my home office. I don't anticipate any problem, and unless I send you a telegram by this Friday, the deal goes through as planned." Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday passed slowly, with the partners nervously waiting to see if the Australian would change his mind. Friday morning went by without incident. Steinberg and Greenbaum were closing up shop when, at ten minutes to five, there was a knock on the door: ..."Telegram!" The partners froze. Trembling, Greenbaum grabbed the telegram and opened it. Suddenly, his face lit up. "Steinberg, GREAT NEWS! Your sister died!" __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock: An International Bonehead Award has been earned by Whitney Berra, Delray Beach, Florida, usa Delray Beach Counselor Charged With Drug Possession, Sale Home>Florida>Boca Raton>Delray Beach Counselor Charged With Drug Possession, Sale Delray Beach Counselor Charged With Drug Possession, Sale Delray Beach Florida A Delray Beach woman who public records show has worked as a mental health counselor in several places is facing her second drug-related arrest in just weeks. BocaNewsNow.com has learned that Whitney Berra of the 600 block of Lavers Circle was arrested by Boca Raton Police early Sunday morning. She remains in the Palm Beach Couty Jail Monday morning on $11,000 bond. Berra is charged with one count of cocaine possession, one count of possessing a controlled substance without a prescription, one count of possessing and intending to sell opium or a derivative, and one count of drug equipment possession and/or use. The arrest comes just weeks after Berras August 12th arrest for cocaine possession and possession of drug paraphernalia. The cocaine charge was not prosecuted but Berra entered three guilty pleas to the paraphernalia charge and spent four days in jail. Public records show that Berra has a Masters degree in Social Work from Florida Atlantic University. _____________________________________________________ An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son; do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife." _____________________________________________________ _________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ The Four Lighthouse In France George Salem ___________________________________________________ A TOMBSTONE READ: Remember me as you pass by, As you are now, so once was I. As I am now, someday youll be, So prepare to follow me. Someone added: To follow you is not my intent, For I dont know which way you went. _________________________________________________ Dearwebby's tech support pits From: Gloria Re: FTP Dear Webby I know you have answered this on a bunch of different occasions, but at the time I was not interested, and it flew right by me. Now I have to upload a bunch of pictures to the company web site, and our IT girl will put them into our pages. What program do I need to do the uploading? Gloria Dear Gloria Get FileZilla. Just download the CLIENT and install it. It is free. FileZilla has become the standard, that everybody tries to copy. They try. Some of them get almost as good, but the vast majority of people and companies use FileZilla. That means hundreds of Millions of people are FileZilla users, who can answer questions, if you have any. There is one thing in common with all those hundreds of Million users of FileZilla. None of them have ever read the instructins. Why? It works! You fill out the FROM and TO settings on the way in, then line up the FROM folder on the left, and the destination folder on the right, highlight the file or files, that you want to upload, right-click them and select UPLOAD. Done. You can now go for coffee. It makes no difference whether you are on Windows, any version, Mac, any version, Linux, any flavor, UNIX, any version. and it is free! Have fun! Dear webby ___________________________________________________ >Thanks to Cookie for this report: The Immigration Officer said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests so far, there is only one test left. Unless you pass it you cannot enter the United States of America. Make a sentence using the words, Yellow, Pink and Green." Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'" Mujibar now works for Verizon. I know because I talked to him yesterday. Cookie ___________________________________________________ Everyone knows that if you are going to operate a business in today's world you need a domain name. It is advisable to look at the domain name selected as other see it and not just as you think it looks. Failure to do this may result in situations such as the following (legitimate) companies who deal in everyday humdrum products and services but clearly didn't give their domain names enough consideration: 1. A site called 'Who Represents' where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name... wait for it... is www.whorepresents.com 2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at www.expertsexchange.com 3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at www.penisland.net 4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at www.therapistfinder.com 5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company... www.powergenitalia.com 6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales: www.molestationnursery.com 7. If you're looking for computer software, there's always www.ipanywhere.com 8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church. Their website is www.cummingfirst.com 9. Then, of course, there's these brainless art designers, and their whacky website: www.speedofart.com 10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at www.gotahoe.com _____________________________________________________ ophelia dingbatter's news no sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt- in confirmation request. ____________________________________________________ today, october 12, in 1492, Christopher Columbus, an Italian explorer, sighted Watling Island in the Bahamas. He believed that he had found Asia while attempting to find a Western ocean route to India. The same day he claimed the land for Isabella and Ferdinand of Spain. 1792, The first monument honoring Christopher Columbus was dedicated in Baltimore, MD. 1810, Bavarian Crown Prince Ludwig married Princess Therese of Saxony-Hildburghausen. The royalty invited the public to attend the event which became an annual celebration that later became known as Oktoberfest. 1892, In celebration of the 400th anniversary of the Columbus landing the original version of the Pledge of Allegiance was first recited in public schools. 1895, In Newport, RI, the first amateur golf tournament was held. 1915, Former U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt criticized U.S. citizens who identified themselves by dual nationalities. 1920, Construction of the Holland Tunnel began. It opened on November 13, 1927. The tunnel links Jersey City, NJ and New York City, NY. 1933, The U.S. Department of Justice acquired Alcatraz Island from the U.S. Army. 1938, Production began on "The Wizard of Oz." 1942, During World War II, Attorney General Francis Biddle announced that Italian nationals in the United States would no longer be considered enemy aliens. 1945, Private First Class Desmond T. Doss was presented with the Congressional Medal of Honor for outstanding bravery as a medical corpsman. He was the first conscientious objector in American history to win the award. 1960, Soviet premier Nikita Khrushchev pounded a shoe on his desk during a dispute at a U.N. General Assembly. 1961, The first video memoirs by a U.S. president were made. Walter Cronkite interviewed Dwight D. Eisenhower. 1964, The Soviet Union launched Voskhod 1 into orbit around the Earth. It was the first space flight to have a multi- person crew and the first flight to be performed without space suits. 1972, During the Vietnam War, a racial brawl broke out aboard the U.S. aircraft carrier Kitty Hawk. Nearly 50 sailors were injured. 1976, China announced that Hua Guo-feng was named to succeed the late Mao Tse-tung as chairman of the Communist Party. 1988, Federal prosecutors announced that the Sundstrand Corp. would pay $115 million dollars to settle with the Pentagon for overbilling airplane parts over a five-year period. 1989, The U.S. House of Representatives approved a statutory federal ban on the destruction of the American flag. 1994, Haitian military leader Raoul Cedras was granted political asylum by Panama. 1994, The Magellan space probe ended its four-year mission to Venus for the purpose of mapping. 1997, The St. Francis Basilica and 15th-century bell tower above Foligno city hall in Italy were damaged by 3 earthquakes. 1998, The U.S. House of Representatives passed the Online Copyright Bill. 1999, In Pakistan, Pervez Musharraf seized power in a bloodless coup that toppled Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif. The Supreme Court ruled that the coup was legal but insisted that a civilian government be restored within three years. 2001, A special episode of America's Most Wanted was aired that focused on 22 wanted terrorists. The show was specifically requested by U.S. President George W. Bush. 2006, The Dow Jones industrial average advanced over 11,900 for the first time. 2015, It was announced that Dell was buying EMC for around $67 billion. 2022 Do! smiled. |
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Go to TOP Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN ! Dear Webby from Webby.com Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name, or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me. I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly from then on. If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me. I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request. To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to [email protected] If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time, then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription. If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html You can also UNsubscribe there. If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter, please unsubscribe by clicking the link below: You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address: [email protected] UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter | . |