Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, June 9 3.8% Unemployment, more job openings than applicants! If Trump keeps that up, pretty soon I'll have to move South to help out! With Mexifornia handing out Visas with Democratic Party registrations, that should not be difficult. I was told you don't really have to vote for Pelousy just because of registering for Democratic Party junkmail. Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Man from Georgia busted with guns, hollow-point bullets at Port Authority Bus Terminal Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, June 9 in 1534 Jacques Cartier became the first to sail into the river he named Saint Lawrence. More of today in history at HIstory ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. --- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. --- Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ One day as the water of the mighty Mississippi River rose a man and his son were forced to retreat to their rooftop. While there, a neighbour passed by in a row boat and shouted, "Come with me I'll take you to higher ground." The man politely refused saying, "I have faith in the lord, he will save me." Two hours later as the water continued to rise another neighbour passed in a rubber raft, offering to take them to higher ground. Again he refused saying, "I have faith in the lord, he will save me." Four hours passed and as the man and his son clung to the chimney, trying to avoid the rising water a Coast Guard helicopter hovered overhead and threw down a ladder, "Climb up so we can take you to higher ground!" he heard them say. Again he refused saying, "I have faith in the lord, he will save me!" Well no one else came and they met their fate. Standing before God, the man said, "Lord I believed in you, my faith was strong and unwavering and you let us drown!" Looking at him God replied, "You dumb ass! I sent a boat, a raft, and a helicopter, what more did you want from me? A cruise ship?" _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Lorikeets _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! _____________________________________________________ Leroy was telling his friend Bubba about the date he had the night before, "It was a bummer. She used four letter words all evening." Bubba exclaimed, "Really? I can't believe you didn't enjoy that." "Guess again," said Leroy, "All night she kept saying 'Quit,' 'Stop,' and 'Don't!'" ____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Grant Hall, 21, Georgia Man from Georgia busted with guns, hollow-point bullets at Port Authority Bus Terminal A man from Georgia who has been living out of his car at Midtown's Port Authority Bus Terminal for the last two weeks was arrested after Port Authority police found two handguns, dozens of hollow- point bullets and a machete inside his vehicle, sources said Tuesday. Grant Hall, 21, is facing a host of weapons possession charges after the firearms were found in his 2006 Honda Element Monday. His car was found in the LAZ parking lot above the terminal on the fifth floor of the Midtown terminal, Port Authority police said. Police Officer Shaun Kehoe and rookie Police Officers Joey Cassera, William Salzmann, and Jeffrey Hager who were on their first day of service at the bus terminal were called to the parking lot on a report of a suspicious person looking into car windows of parked vehicles. The cops quickly found Hall, who confessed that he had been living in his car inside the parking lot for the past two weeks. Hall was making his way to Montreal, he told the officers. Cops inspected Hall's vehicle, recovering the two unloaded handguns, a 9-mm. magazine that can hold 30 rounds, two more magazines that can hold 15 rounds each, 60 9-mm. hollow-point bullets, a machete and a hatchet. Hall was charged with two counts of gun possession, according to court documents. Tech Support Pits From: Fast Eddie Re: Which computer is faster? Hi Mr Webby; I am in search of another computer and saw one over on "Tigerdirect" it is....... blah blah blah And I have one here at home (below!) I just wanted to know which one is faster? (in speed!) Reason why is because I want to give one of these to my daughter and I would like something faster! Fast Eddie Dear Fast Eddie Whichever machine has fewer programs and utilities, will be the faster one. The hardware makes little difference, since the slowest part is the chair-to-keyboard interface. Give the polluted one to your daughter, get yourself a new one, and try as hard as you can to refrain from installing utilities. Have FUN DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. A lion woke up one morning feeling rowdy. He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty lion! Later, the lion confronts a deer and bellows, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" The terrified deer stammers, "Oh great lion, you are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle!" On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an elephant and roars, "Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?" Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up the lion with his trunk, slams him against a tree half a dozen times, the lion is feeling like it'd been run over by a safari wagon. The elephant then stomped on the lion till it looked like a corn tortilla, then crapped on it, and ambled away. The lion hollered after the elephant, "Damn, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so p'd off !" | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
The Importance Of "Correct Punctuation" *Version One* Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours? Jane *Version Two* Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? Yours, Jane ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Storing Paint Cans Before storing paint, put some paint on the top and side of the can so you can easily see what color it is. If the can is almost empty, transfer it to a smaller container since paint cans take up a lot of shelf space. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ "'Muesli' is not a word we use in America. When we sweep up after we have been doing woodwork and put it in a bag with mixed nuts and a little birdseed, and pretend it's a health- ful breakfast, we call it granola." ---Bill Bryson Rabbi Mendel was one day walking along a very narrow street, when he came face to face with a rival Rabbi. The street was too narrow for the two to pass. The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said haughtily: . . . "I never make way for fools " Smiling, Rabbi Mendel stepped aside and said, . . ."I always do." ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
>From Ella At the Boeing Museum of Flight in Seattle, there is a full size mockup of an F/A-18 fighter. A ramp allows visitors to climb into the cockpit and get a sense of what the pilot sees and feels. A guide at the top of the ramp points out the various controls and gauges in the cockpit and gives information about the aircraft's capabilities to each visitor who gets in. When my four-year-old grandson sat down in the plane, he seemed fascinated by all he saw and heard. Then, he looked out at us and said, "Gramma, could I have a quarter?" ____________________________________________________ | Today, June 9 in 1064 Coimbra, Portugal fell to Ferdinand, the King of Castile. 1534 Jacques Cartier became the first to sail into the river he named Saint Lawrence. 1790 John Barry copyrighted "Philadelphia Spelling Book." It was the first American book to be copyrighted. 1790 Civil war broke out in Martinique. 1860 The Ms. Ann Stevens book "Malaeska, the Indian Wife of the White Hunter" was offered for sale for a dime. It was the first published "dime novel." 1923 Bulgaria's government was overthrown by the military. 1931 Robert H. Goddard patented a rocket-fueled aircraft design. 1934 Donald Duck made his debut in the Silly Symphonies cartoon "The Wise Little Hen." 1940 Norway surrendered to the Nazis during World War II. 1943 The withholding tax on payrolls was authorized by the U.S. Congress. 1945 Japanese Premier Kantaro Suzuki declared that Japan would fight to the last rather than accept unconditional surrender. 1959 The first ballistic missile carrying submarine, the USS George Washington, was launched. 1973 Secretariat won the 105th Belmont Stakes by 31 lengths and ran the fastest 1 1/2 miles on dirt at 2:24. 1978 Leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints struck down a 148-year-old policy of excluding black men from the Mormon priesthood. 1980 Richard Pryor was severely burned by a "free-base" mixture that exploded. He was hospitalized more than two months. 1985 Thomas Sutherland, an American educator, was kidnapped in Lebanon. He was not released until November 1991. 1986 The Rogers Commission released a report on the Challenger disaster. The report explained that the spacecraft blew up as a result of a failure in a solid rocket booster joint. 1999 NATO and Yugoslavia signed a peace agreement over Kosovo. 2000 Canada and the United States signed a border security agreement. The agreement called for the establishment of a border- enforcement team. 2000 The U.S. House of Representatives voted to repeal gift and estate taxes. The bill called for the taxes to be phased out over 10 years. 2001 Patrick Roy (Colorado Avalanche) became the first National Hockey League (NHL) player to win three Conn Smythe Trophies. The award is given to the playoff's Most Valuable Player. 2011 The world's first artificial organ transplant was performed. It was an artificial windpipe coated with stem cells. 2018 Do smiled. |
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!
ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to [email protected]
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
[email protected]
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter | . | Search the web for:
Recommended Resources Find a human
Bypass voice menus
Web Tools
handy program downloads
SPAM CONTROL made Easy!
Click here for a FREE
30 day trial
This is the Mail Washer that I use and have
used for over 10 years. I have tested many
others, but Mail Washer is still The Best
spam control Crap Cleaner Safely get rid of
tons of useless crap left over from
old, obsolete updates, temp files, lost
file fragments, etc.
STILL FREE
As a matter of fact this service do my essays regularly when I send my request. Babelfish Translator Converter Urban Legends
Truth or Hoax?
Check before believing chain letters
Great tool for getting rid of
spy-ware and mal-ware. Still FREE
STUDENTS! We can write your essays, reviews, dissertations, etc. at DoMyEssay.net Virus Hoaxes
Virus / Trojan / Malware Info
Straight from McAfee Threat Center
FREE HTML Course !
Get the REAL McAfee
at incredible discount!
used and
Highly recommended
by Dear Webby
This Undeleter will easily and securely recover deleted files from hard drives, flash drives, USB external drives, Zip drives, Firewire drives, digital camera cards, and more. This powerful recovery software can recover deleted files from most data loss scenarios.
Is your data worth recovery? SmartFix The ONLY Registry Fixer, that I recommend!
All In One PX Fixer has all the necessary tools included: Fix System Errors, Improve Startup, Clean Registry, Defrag Disk, Optimize System Settings, Back-Up, etc. Currently Smart OC Fixer is 50% off regular price! Roboform, still the best password manager.
Still FREE
Highly recommended by DearWebby
FREE, no fuss download!
Domain Name registration:
Discuss your needs first, don't just register a name, that might not be good for you! Ask DearWebby first. That will save you a lot of money!
YOUR OWN
Postcard Site ! You too can easily have a postcard site for business or fun.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Cumuli Ezine Finder: Etiquette To Get Read
Ebook with power tips
for effective writing,
by DearWebby
Ads are $50 per month for subscribers only.
$60 per month for anybody else.
Dear Bubba
All is forgiven. I still love you. Please come back!
Ps. Congratulations on your lottery win!
Your Betty-Sue
That could be YOUR ad for $50 per week.
Subscribers only!
Nudist Colony of Alberta
Closed for the season
Space Weather
Solar storms, Auroras
Thesaurus
NASA Multimedia Gallery Sky Map: the interactive planetarium of the Web
Sky Watch: Calendar of celestial events
Weather Underground
Maps and Satellite
Click a meal to a homeless vet!
HungerSite
A free click donates a cup of food to a hungry person.
The number of mammograms donated thanks to clicks has dropped quite noticeably when these two ladies went away. So here they are back, working hard to get you to click. Donate by clicking on them!
BreastCancer Site
A free click helps to donate mammograms to women who can not afford one.
Feed the Animals!
Animal Rescue
Do, Please Feed Dear Webby!
Privacy Policy
Unique visitors since 1/1/11
Have FUN
Dear Webby
CEO of Webby, Inc
DearWebby @ webby.com
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada |
|
