Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, October 16 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Man arrested for raping teen, months after being busted in online sexual predator sting _____________________________________________________ Today, October 16 in 1978 Poland's Karol Josef Wojtyla was elected Pope John Paul II. _____________________________________________________ Look for the ridiculous in everything and you will find it. --- Jules Renard (1864 - 1910) A strong conviction that something must be done is the parent of many bad measures. --- Daniel Webster (1782 - 1852) "Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful." --- Ann Landers "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." --- Robert A. Heinlein _____________________________________________________ >From Donny After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes. As the train rolled out of the station, a woman sitting next to him pulled out her mobile phone. She started talking in a loud voice: "Hi sweetheart. It's Sue. I'm on the train". "Yes, I know it's the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting. No, honey, not with that Kevin from the accounting office. It was with the boss. No sweetheart, you're the only one in my life. Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart!" Fifteen minutes later, she was still talking loudly. When the man sitting next to her had enough, he leaned over and said into the phone, "Sue, hang up the phone and come back to bed." Sue doesn't use her mobile phone in public any longer. _____________________________________________________ Varied Thrush Lake Minnewanka Shirley Otway ___________________________________________________ Two RV drivers arrive in front of a tunnel. The sign says MAXIMUM HEIGHT 3 METERS. The first driver measures the RV and says, "Damn...3 .2 meters!" The second one looks furtively around and says, "No police, anywhere. We can go!" ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Christopher Contreras, 26, Fresno, California, USA Man arrested for raping teen, months after being busted in online sexual predator sting A 26-year-old man has been arrested for raping a teenager just months after he was busted in a sexual predator sting, according to the Fresno County Sheriff's Office. The Sheriff's Office says Christopher Contreras of Fresno is responsible for raping a 15-year-old girl while he was out on bail following the sting. Detectives carried out a search warrant at Contreras' home, where they seized his electronic devices. He was arrested at his home on Tuesday, October 13th. He faces charges of rape, trying to meet up with a minor for sex and committing a felony while out on bail. Contreras had been out on bail following his arrest in late July during the undercover operation COVID Chat Down, which targeted online predators as internet usage increased during the lockdown. The Sheriff's Office says Contreras was one of 34 men who were arrested for trying to arrange sex with a minor during the operation. Contreras spent less than a day in jail and was released on August 1st after posting a bond of $1,000. 34 Central Valley men were arrested during Operation "COVID Chat Down." . (Photo: Fresno County Sheriff's Office. During 'Operation COVID Chat Down,' detectives say they posed as 12 and 13-year-old children online to catch dozens of predators. The 34 men arrested during the operation ranged from 19 to 63- years-old. Most of the men arrested were able to bond out of jail because the bail schedule for their charges was set at just $5,000. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Moe RE: Fast browser Dear Webby, I heard about a fast, light weight browser on the radio, but I was driving and coould not get or write down the URL for it. What is is? Moe Dear Moe That would be Maxthon. I think originally it was from China, but now they have an office in San Francisco. I have not used it for at least 15 years. It might be OK now. It seems to be surprisingly non-political. Download is at Maxthon Have FUN! DearWebby If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work, Please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! | _____________________________________________ How A Man Chose A Mate Schmuel Gottlieb is dating three women and can't make up his mind which one to marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first, Yetta Feingold does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. Schmuel was impressed. The second, Esther Wallenstein goes shopping to buy Schmuel gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, Schmuel is impressed. The third, Sadie Abromowitz, invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, Schmuel was impressed. Schmuel Gottlieb thought for a long time about which of the women he would like to marry. Finally, he decided to marry the one with the biggest chest. Men are like that, you know. ____________________________________________ "I'm telling you, Carol, I've never been happier, " Betty told her friend. "I have two boyfriends. One is just fabulous...handsome,sensitive, caring and considerate." What in the world do you need the second one for?" Carol asked?" "Oh," Betty replied, "the second one is straight." ____________________________________________ Two women were paired together as partners in a club tournament and met on the putting green for the first time. After introductions, the first golfer asked, "What's your handicap?" "Oh, I'm a scratch golfer," the other replied. "Really!" exclaimed the first woman, suitably impressed that she was paired up with her. "Yes, I write down all my good scores and scratch out the bad ones! ____________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. | ___________________________________________________ Today October 16 in 1793 During the French Revolution, Queen Marie Antoinette was beheaded after being convicted of treason. 1829 In Boston, MA, the first modern hotel in America opened. The Tremont Hotel had 170 rooms that rented for $2 a day and included four meals. 1859 Abolitionist John Brown led a raid on Harper's Ferry, VA (now located in West Virginia). 1869 A hotel in Boston became the first in the U.S. to install indoor plumbing. 1916 Margaret Sanger opened the first birth control clinic in New York City, NY. 1923 Walt Disney contracted with M.J. Winkler to distribute the Alice Comedies. This event is recognized as the start of the Disney Company. 1928 Marvin Pipkin received a patent for the frosted electric light bulb. 1941 The Nazis advanced to within 60 miles of Moscow. Romanians entered Odessa, USSR, and began exterminating 150,000 Jews. 1943 Chicago's new subway system was officially opened with a ribbon cutting ceremony. 1962 U.S. President Kennedy was informed that there were missile bases in Cuba, beginning the Cuban missile crisis. 1964 China detonated its first atomic bomb becoming the world's fifth nuclear power. 1967 NATO headquarters opened in Brussels. 1970 Anwar Sadat was elected president of Egypt to succeed Gamal Abdel Nassar. 1973 Henry Kissinger and Le Duc Tho were named winners of the Nobel Peace Prize. The Vietnamese official declined the award. 1978 Poland's Karol Josef Wojtyla was elected Pope John Paul II. 1982 China announced that it had successfully fired a ballistic missile from a submarine. 1987 Rescuers freed Jessica McClure from the abandoned well that she had fallen into in Midland, TX. She was trapped for 58 hours. 1993 The U.N. Security Council approved the deployment of U.S. warships to enforce a blockade on Haiti to increase pressure on the controlling military leaders. 1997 Charles M. Schulz and his wife Jeannie announced that they would give $1 million toward the construction of a D-Day memorial to be placed in Virginia. 2000 It was announced that Chevron Corp. would be buying Texaco Inc. for $35 billion. The combined company was called Chevron Texaco Corp. and became the 4th largest oil company in the world. 2002 It was reported that North Korea had told the U.S. that it had a secret nuclear weapons program in violation of an 1994 agreement with the U.S. 2002 The Arthur Andersen accounting firm was sentenced to five years probation and fined $500,000 for obstructing a federeal investigation of the energy company Enron. 2008 The iTunes Music Store reached 200 billion television episodes sold. 2020 Do smiled. |
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