Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, November 24 | 1411If you like my work,
Please donate a dollar,
or two, if you can afford it!
Please, help me stay online!
|
___________________________________________________ History: on this day, November 24, in 1998, AOL (America Online) announced a deal for their purchase of Netscape for $4.21 billion. Then they shelved it and used Microsoft Internet Explorer instead. Their victims never forgave them for that. ____________________________________________________ Bonehed Award: 18 year old murderer arrested _____________________________________________________ Q There is no such thing as "fun for the whole family." --- Jerry Seinfeld (1954 - ) ____________________________________________________ "There is no free will," said the old sage, "for you may not choose your parents nor the hour of your birth, neither may you select the time and manner of your death, nor may you have any voice in what passes in between, although if you can afford a good plastic surgeon, you might be able to pick your own nose." __________________________________________________ Thanks to Buddy & Jackie for this one: I heard about a lady who was speeding and an officer pulled her to the side of the road. She didn't have her seat belt on so as soon as she stopped, she quickly slipped it on before the officer got to her window. After talking to her about speeding, the officer said, "I see you are wearing your seat belt. Do you believe in wearing it at all times?" "Yes, I do, officer," she replied. "Well," asked the officer, "do you always do it up with it looped through your steering wheel?" __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock: An International Bonehead Award has been earned by Daevon Motshwane, 18, Merced, California USA 18 year old murderer arrested 18-year-old Daevon Motshwane appeared in court through Zoom wearing a yellow jumpsuit. He was arrested in the killing of 9-month-old Darius King Grigsby in a drive-by shooting on November 9. Baby Darius was being pushed in his stroller by his mother, who was walking along 12th street in Merced with her friend when shots were fired. Authorities say the mother's friend was the intended target, not baby Darius. It's the first time the baby boy's family has seen Motshwane in person since the incident. "It makes me angry very much," says Monica Ayala. "Like, he's just sitting there and acting like it's nothing to him. My blood started to boil when I saw his face on TV." Ayala says she was furious. She said she's known Motshwane for many years and felt betrayed. "Me knowing that he's the killer of my baby really made me angry because I knew you my whole life and out of everybody, I didn't expect you to do it," she said. "I feel like he deserves no bail, he don't need no bail. He needs to be in there for life." Motshwane is charged with one count of murder and two counts of attempted murder with enhancements. The court set the bail to $2.7 million. Baby Darius was laid to rest on Saturday. Despite their loss, the family still holds on to each other and has his memories close to their heart. The family members continue to ask for your prayers. Motshwane is due back in court next Thursday for his arraignment. ___________________________________________________ Gisela Delpho Kingfisher ___________________________________________________ A wife one evening drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple ? How loving they are ? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that ? she asked. The husband replied "I tried that once, but she slapped me." ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ March 9, 2021: This big, beautiful and blue galaxy is formally known as NGC 2336. In this image, captured by the Hubble Space Telescope, you can see the barred spiral galaxy, which lies about 100 million light-years away in the constellation Camelopardalis (the Giraffe), stretching across the cosmos, with a "wingspan" measuring about 200,000 light- years. -- Chelsea Gohd _________________________________________________ ===From Jennifer can you send me tyhe joke about the man who goes into church asking for the head hog at the trough and the secretary gets upset because of the man calling the pastor a hog etc. will you email me the joke again? thanks Jennifer==== Sure. That one has been a favorite and been asked for quite a few times since I first featured it in 94. Here it is: One day a man called the church office. He said, "Can I speak to the head hog at the trough?" The secretary thought she heard what he said, but said, "I'm sorry, who?" The caller repeated, "Can I speak to the head hog at the trough?" She said, "Well, if you mean the preacher, then you may refer to him as 'Pastor,' or 'Brother,' but I prefer that you not refer to him as the 'head hog at the trough'!" To this the man replied, "Well, I was planning on giving $100,000 to the building fund...." To this the secretary quickly responded "Hang on, I think the big fat pig just waddled in!" _______________________________________________ A man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch. Someone called 911. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint. "It was enough to make anybody faint," he said. "My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the SNOW SHOVEL !" __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ At one point in my life I had considered joining the Baptist Church. For those of you who don't know, the Baptists practice total body immersion to baptize a person. Luckily I even knew a minister in that faith, having dated his daughter, and I asked him if he would consider performing the service. He paused a minute or two, gave me a long thoughtful look and said, "If you're serious about this, a dipping just won't do it for you. We'll have to find a place to anchor you overnight." ___________________________________________________ A Priest at a Church picnic was staring at a member of his parish wearing the tiniest of bikinis. A Nun walked over and said, "Shame on you Father, staring at that woman like that!" The Priest replied, "Sister Mary Elizabeth, I know that you are on a diet, and yet I saw you ogling the buffet." __________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From:Jan Re: Does Crap Cleaner interfere with MalwareBytes? Dear Webby Does Crap Cleaner interfere with MalwareBytes? Jan Dear Jan They don't interfere with each oher. CrapCleaner is a bunch of janitors going after silly nuisances like left-over file fragments, and obsolete updates for programs you have dumped. Malwarebytes blocks bad stuff from coming in like it was a platoon of fully armed Marines outside your gate. Don't worry about it. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ Trying to control her frizzy and dry hair, Kay treated her scalp with olive oil before washing it. Worried that the oil might leave an odor than that her hair obviously needed it, she washed her hair several times with strong soap. That night when Kay went to bed, she leaned over to her husband and asked, "Do I smell like olive oil?" "Why ?" he asked, pulling back. "Do I smell like Popeye?" Ophelia Dingbatter's News no sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt- in confirmation request. ____________________________________________________ Today, November 24, in 1615, French King Louis XIII married Ann of Austria. They were both 14 years old. 1859, Charles Darwin, a British naturalist, published "On the Origin of Species." It was the paper in which he explained his theory of evolution through the process of natural selection. 1863, During the Civil War, the battle for Lookout Mountain began in Tennessee. 1871, The National Rifle Association was incorporated in the U.S. 1874, Joseph F. Glidden was granted a patent for a barbed fencing material. 1903, Clyde J. Coleman received the patent for an electric self-starter for an automobile. 1940, Nazis closed off the Jewish ghetto in Warsaw, Poland. Over the next three years the population dropped from 350,000 to 70,000 due to starvation, disease and deportations to concentration camps. 1944, During World War II, the first raid against the Japanese capital of Tokyo was made by land-based U.S. bombers. 1947, The "Hollywood 10," were cited for contempt of Congress for refusing to answer questions about alleged Communist influence in their industry. 1947, John Steinbeck's novel "The Pearl" was published for the first time. 1963, Dallas nightclub owner Jack Ruby shot and killed Lee Harvey Oswald live on national television. 1969, Apollo 12 landed safely in the Pacific Ocean bringing an end to the second manned mission to the moon. 1971, Hijacker Dan Cooper, known as D.B. Cooper, parachuted from a Northwest Airlines 727 over Washington state with $200,000 in ransom. 1983, The Palestine Liberation Organization released six Israeli prisoners in exchange for the release of 4,500 Palestinians and Lebanese held by the Israelis. 1985, In Malta, Egyptian commandos stormed an Egyptian jetliner. 60 people died in the raid. 1987, The U.S. and the Soviet Union agreed to scrap short- and medium-range missiles. It was the first superpower treaty to eliminate an entire class of nuclear weapons. 1989, Czechoslovakia's hard-line party leadership resigned after more than a week of protests against its policies. 1992, In China, a domestic jetliner crashed, killing 141 people. 1993, The U.S. Congress gave its final approval to the Brady handgun control bill. 1993, Robert Thompson and Jon Venables (both 11 years old) were convicted of murdering 2-year-old James Bulger of Liverpool, England. They were both sentenced to "indefinite detention." 1995, In Ireland, the voters narrowly approved a constitutional amendment legalizing divorce. 1996, Rusty Wallace won the first NASCAR event to be held in Japan. 1998, AOL (America Online) announced a deal for their purchase of Netscape for $4.21 billion. Then they shelved it and used Microsoft Internet Explorer instead. Their victims never forgave them for that. 2022 Do smiled.
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to [email protected]
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
[email protected]
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter | . |
