---
 Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, July 5 Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: SC crook out of jail for 30 minutes then stole a police car Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, July 5 in 1951 Dr. William Shockley announced that he had invented the junction transistor. More of today in history at HIstory ______________________________________________________ 
 If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
 
  
 The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. --- E E Cummings (1894 - 1962) ____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ Tom had proposed to young Maureen and was being interviewed by his prospective father-in-law. "Do you think you are earning enough to support a family?" the older man asked the suitor. "Yes, sir", replied Tom, "I'm sure I am." "Think carefully now," said Maureen's father warningly. "There are twelve of us." _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________   _____________________________________________________ 
 If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  Thanks for your votes!
 _____________________________________________________ Interview with Yogi Berra Interviewer: Can you explain jazz? Yogi: I can't, but I will. 90% of all jazz is half improvisation. The other half is the part people play while others are playing something they never played with anyone who played that part. So if you play the wrong part, its right. If you play the right part, it might be right if you play it wrong enough. But if you play it too right, it's wrong. Interviewer: I don't understand. Yogi: Anyone who understands jazz knows that you can't understand it. It's too complicated. That's whats so simple about it. Interviewer: Do you understand it? Yogi: No. That's why I can explain it. If I understood it, I wouldnt know anything about it. Interviewer: Are there any great jazz players alive today? Yogi: No. All the great jazz players alive today are dead. Except for the ones that are still alive. But so many of them are dead, that the ones that are still alive are dying to be like the ones that are dead. Some would kill for it. Interviewer: What is syncopation? Yogi: That's when the note that you should hear now happens either before or after you hear it. In jazz, you don't hear notes when they happen because that would be some other type of music. Other types of music can be jazz, but only if they're the same as something different from those other kinds. Interviewer: Now I really don't understand. Yogi: I haven't taught you enough for you to not understand jazz ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Davon Deangelo Fuller 23, Holly Hill, South Carolina  SC crook out of jail for 30 minutes then stole a police car  A South Carolina man was back behind bars less than 24 hours after being released from a Lowcountry jail. Davon Deangelo Fuller did not waste any time getting back into trouble with law enforcement. The 23-year-old Holly Hill man was released from the Hill-Finklea Detention Center at 9:30 p.m. Monday, abcnews4.com reported. By 9:55 p.m. Fuller had not left the parking lot, but Moncks Corner Police said he already committed a crime, according to live5news.com. Fuller stole a car a Berkeley County Sheriff's Office deputy's car from the detention center parking lot, live5news.com reported. Police said Fuller was caught on surveillance footage hanging around outside the jail after his release. The video showed him attempting to open several cars, according to abcnews4.com, which said he wasn't successful until he got to the patrol car of Berkeley County Sheriff's deputy Javon Dingle. The car was unlocked, and a spare set of keys was not the only thing inside, live5news.com reported. Police said that Dingle's service pistol was also in the vehicle when Fuller stole the car. After viewing the surveillance footage, it didn't take law enforcement long to locate Fuller, who was arrested Tuesday, "in possession of the car and the gun," in St. Stephen, where police reported he told officers "he stole the vehicle because he needed a ride," according to abcnews4.com. Fuller was charged with grand larceny (value more than $2,000 but less than $10,000), according to jail records. Fuller, who had been in jail for unlawful carrying of a pistol, was behind bars again, this time in the Berkeley County Detention Center, according to the sheriff's office. He has not had a bond hearing for the most recent charge. 
 Tech Support Pits From: Joyce Re: Choice of picture viewer  Dear Webby Whenever someone sends me a picture attachment, the Windows picture viewer pops up with the attachment. How can I change it so that my Picasa shows the picture instead of the Windows picture viewer? Is it even possible to change it to something other than that? Thanks and have a great weekend! Sincerely, Joyce  Dear Joyce Go to MyComputer Tools Folder Options DON'T do what Microsoft says at http://support.microsoft.com/kb/307859 they are a bit confused about it. Instead click on File Types After a while, it will fill it's window with all the file types and shows what programs are associated with them. Find JPG, and change it's file association to Picasa then do the same for GIF and PNG When done, hit OK until you are out of all that. Have FUN DearWebby  
 Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. 
 Q: How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would sit in this house in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS . . . I'm sorry. . .what did you ask me? 
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
 
  
 A young and arrogant pilot wanted to "show off" on the aviation frequencies as he was approaching an airfield during the night. So, he disregarded policy and, instead of making an official request to the tower, he said, "Guess who?" The air traffic controller switched the field lights off and replied, "Guess where?" ____________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organized Camping Meals  Here's a tip to save to help you organize your meals when camping. Measure ingredients for a recipe into small ziplock bags and then place those into one large bag with a label. It makes meal preparation a snap and ensures that you don't pack a lot of extra ingredients.   Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com  ____________________________________________________   
 
 
A brief compendium of art nouveau treasures.
 ___________________________________________________ A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside-down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot. Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a rip-off! I put him on the pot before a whole audience and he didn't dance a single step!" "So?" asked the ducks former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?" ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital with heart trou8ble. The family called their pastor to stand with them. As the pastor stood next to the bed, Fred's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on. The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died. The pastor thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, as the pastor was finishing the eulogy, he realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Fred had died. He said, "you know, ol' Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven't looked at it, but knowing Fred, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all. Let's have his son read it to us!" His son opened the note, and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube, you useless windbag!" ____________________________________________________  
 Today, July 5 in 1806 A Spanish army repelled the British during their attempt to retake Buenos Aires, Argentina. 1811 Venezuela became the first South American country to declare independence from Spain. 1814 U.S. troops under Jacob Brown defeated a superior British force at Chippewa, Canada. 1830 France occupied the North African city of Algiers. 1832 The German government began curtailing freedom of the press after German Democrats advocate a revolt against Austrian rule. 1839 British naval forces bombarded Dingai on Zhoushan Island in China and then occupied it. 1863 U.S. Federal troops occupied Vicksburg, MS, and distributed supplies to the citizens. 1865 William Booth founded the Salvation Army in London. 1865 The U.S. Secret Service Division was created to combat currency counterfeiting, forging and the altering of currency and securities. 1892 Andrew Beard was issued a patent for the rotary engine. 1916 Adelina and August Van Buren started on the first successful transcontinental motorcycle tour to be attempted by two women. They started in New York City and arrived in San Diego, CA, on September 12, 1916. 1935 U.S. President Roosevelt signed the National Labor Relations Act into law. The act authorized labor to organize for the purpose of collective bargaining. 1940 During World War II, Britain and the Vichy government in France broke diplomatic relations. 1941 German troops reached the Dnieper River in the Soviet Union. 1943 The battle of Kursk began as German tanks attack the Soviet salient. It was the largest tank battle in history. 1946 The bikini bathing suit, popularized by Louis Reard, made its debut during a fashion show at the Molitor Pool in Paris. Micheline Bernardini wore the two-piece outfit. 1948 Britain's National Health Service Act went into effect, providing government-financed medical and dental care. 1950 U.S. forces engaged the North Koreans for the first time at Osan, South Korea. 1951 Dr. William Shockley announced that he had invented the junction transistor. 1962 Algeria became independent after 132 years of French rule. 1975 Arthur Ashe became the first black man to win a Wimbledon singles title when he defeated Jimmy Connors. 1984 The U.S. Supreme Court weakened the 70-year-old "exclusionary rule," deciding that evidence seized with defective court warrants could be used against defendants in criminal trials. 1991 Regulators shut down the Pakistani-managed Bank of Credit and Commerce International (BCCI) in eight countries. The charge was fraud, drug money laundering and illegal infiltration into the U.S. banking system. 1995 The U.S. Justice Department decided not to take antitrust action against Ticketmaster. 1998 Japan joined U.S. and Russia in space exploration with the launching of the Planet-B probe to Mars. 2000 Jordanian security agents shot and killed a Syrian hijacker after he threw a grenade that exploded and wounded 15 passengers aboard a Royal Jordanian airliner. 2000 10 Bengal tigers, including 7 rare white tigers, died at the Nandankanan Zoo in India. The tigers died of trypanosomiasis (sleeping sickness). 2000 Euan Blair, the oldest son of British prime minister Tony Blair, was arrested after police found him drunk and lying on the ground in London's Leicester Square. 2018 Do smiled. 
 

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!

ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog