Googlad0r Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, November 7 ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Chicago Sisters Stab Store Security Guard 27 Times After Being Asked to Wear Face Masks _____________________________________________________ Today, November 7 in 1917 Russia's Bolshevik Revolution took place. The provisional government of Alexander Kerensky was overthrown by forces led by Vladimir Ilyich Lenin. _____________________________________________________ If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you. --- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900) To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer. --- Farmers' Almanac, 1978 _____________________________________________________ >From Ann My 5 year old son was playing and was busily building up a fort in the living room. I asked him how his fort was coming along and if he would like help making it. He said " It's not a fort mom, its a dog house!" I said " Honey we don't have a dog. " To which he immediately replied " Well I think its time we got one since we have a dog house!" _____________________________________________________ Gheghici Monica in Targu-Neamt ___________________________________________________ Kyle and Justin were about to eat with the baby-sitter when 6 year old, Kyle said, "You can't sit in Daddy's seat" Daddy's not home," the babysitter replied. "Since I'm responsible for you while he's gone, I can sit here. Today I'm the boss" Justin, the 4 year old, quickly piped up, "If you're the boss, you sit over there." He pointed to his mother's chair. __________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Jessica Hill, 21, Jayla Hill, 18 Chicago, Illinois, USA Chicago Sisters Stab Store Security Guard 27 Times After Being Asked to Wear Face Masks Two Chicago women were arrested over the weekend after they allegedly stabbed a store security guard 27 times in response to being asked to take precautions to help prevent the spread of coronavirus. The attack took place at Snipes shoe store in Lawndale on Sunday evening, according to the Chicago Sun-Times, and was captured on surveillance cameras. It occurred after Jessica Hill, 21, and her 18-year-old sister, Jayla Hill, were asked by the store's security guard to put on face masks and use hand sanitizer placed at the front of the store for incoming customers, the newspaper reported. A statewide mandate in Illinois requires masks in public and while working. But the sisters allegedly refused to put on face masks and instead became embroiled in a heated argument with the 32- year-old man, who has not been publicly identified. Amid the argument, Jayla Hill began filming the 6-foot-5- inches, 270-pound security guard on her mobile phone, prompting him to attempt to grab the device. Jessica Hill then allegedly "smashed" a trash can into the guard's face, the Chicago Sun-Times reported, citing Cook County prosecutors. The pair proceeded to punch the man before Jessica Hill pulled out a "comb knife" that had a hidden switch blade and stabbed him in his neck, back and arms while Jayla Hill held his hair to prevent him from moving, prosecutors said. The security guard later broke free, at which point the Hill sisters allegedly kicked him in the head and body amid pleas from the man and the store's manager for the women to stop. But despite the attack, the guard was able to hold the pair in the store until police officers arrived at the scene. The pair were subsequently arrested and held without bail on attempted murder charges. The victim was taken to the nearby Mount Sinai Hospital, where he received treatment for his injuries. Karie James, a spokeswoman for the Chicago Police Department, reported that he remains in critical condition. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Alexis RE: Cursor Color Dear Webby, OK, so what is the rtop secret method for changing the color of the mouse curser? Alexis Dear Alexis You can download large and colorful cursors, that work on web sites, as a Browser Extension. Cursor Color There you can select, for example a good sized fluorescent orage or green cursor that works well on web sites. Unfortunately, that cursor works only in your browser. If you need to change the cursor to be more visible in all programs, try this: Choose Start, Control Panel. In the Control Panel, choose Ease of Access. On the next screen, click on the link that says Change how your mouse works. At the top of the next window, you will find the options for changing both the size and color of your pointer. Personally, I use the bottom of that, wehre you can get a cursor, that changes to the opposite of whatever the background happens to be. With my eyes, that is the best solution. Also look for the choice of Mouse Trails, click that on, and most defintiely the option of targets when you hold CTRL and click the mouse. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ YOU KNOW YOU'RE TRAILER CROWD IF The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night. Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people". You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean. Someone in your family died right after saying: "Hey watch this." You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan. Your junior prom had a daycare. You think the last words of the Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines." You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels. The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas is in it. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge. One of your kids was born on a pool table. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it. You think "loaded dishwasher" means your wife is drunk. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. Your front porch collapses and kills more than five dogs. Your whole family went to the "dental express" at one time to get all their teeth pulled. ____________________________________________ In The Event You Must Leave The House Face it, you will have to go outside eventually. Sure, Amazon.com will deliver right to your door and now even Taco Bell does deliveries, but, mark my words: some day you're going to HAVE to push away from the computer and go... OUTSIDE. Scary, I know, but to assist you with the basics, here's a guide: 1. Wear pants or a skirt Countless attempts to better oneself have been cut tragically short by leaving the house without proper attire. 2. Use Your Real Name - Sorry, but nobody will be impressed if you go by the name "2HOT4U", "Monarch" or SATAN666." Names like "Steve" or Greg" or "Peggy" are just fine. 3.The Telephone is Your Friend Hear that ringing sound? Pick up the phone. Now speak into it. 4. If Your Car Crashes, You Cannot Simply Reboot It. 5. Do Not Be Surprised That Nobody Looks Like Gillian Anderson. 6. Do Not Flame People - Comparing everyone you disagree with to unclean primates will not win you friends. In fact, you may get into a physical fight. If so, the next tip may be of help. 7. That Red Stuff is Called Blood - Not to be confused with ketchup, blood is what keeps you alive. If you are leaking, the real world offers human tech support in the form of doctors and hospitals. ____________________________________________ TECH SUPPORT And then we heard.... Customer: "I have Microword Soft." Customer: "Microwave Windows?" Customer: "Will this upgrade include Microwave 97?" Customer: (Referring to Microsoft Defrag) "I ran Microwave Defrost, but it didn't help." Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder." Customer: "I have Microscope Exploiter." Customer: "I have Chrome Complicator." Customer: "I have Chrome Regulator." Customer: "Uhh...I have Chrome and Outlook Exposure." Customer: "I have a US Robotics Sportscaster modem." Customer: "It's not my computer that is slow. I have a 200 horse power hard drive." ____________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today November 7 in 1637 Anne Hutchinson, the first female religious leader in the American colonies, was banished from the Massachusetts Bay Colony for heresy. 1665 "The London Gazette" was first published. 1811 The Shawnee Indians of chief Tecumseh were defeated by William Henry Harrison at the Battle of Wabash (or (Tippecanoe). 1837 In Alton, IL, abolitionist printer Elijah P. Lovejoy was shot to death by a mob (Democrat supporters of slavery) while trying to protect his printing shop from a third destruction. 1874 The Republican party of the U.S. was first symbolized as an elephant in a cartoon by Thomas Nast in Harper's Weekly. 1876 The cigarette manufacturing machine was patented by Albert H. Hook. 1893 The state of Colorado granted its women the right to vote. 1895 The last spike was driven into Canada's first transcontinental railway in the mountains of British Columbia. 1916 Jeanette Rankin of Montana became the first woman elected to the U.S. Congress. 1917 Russia's Bolshevik Revolution took place. The provisional government of Alexander Kerensky was overthrown by forces led by Vladimir Ilyich Lenin. 1932 "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" was broadcast for the first on CBS Radio. 1933 Voters in Pennsylvania eliminated sports from Pennsylvanian "Blue Laws." 1940 The middle section of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in Washington state collapsed during a windstorm. The suspension bridge had opened to traffic on July 1, 1940. 1944 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt became the first person to win a fourth term as president. 1965 The "Pillsbury Dough Boy" debuted in television commercials. 1967 Carl Stokes was elected the first black mayor Cleveland, OH, becoming the first black mayor of a major city. 1967 The U.S. Selective Service Commission announced that college students arrested in anti-war demonstrations would lose their draft deferments. 1973 New Jersey became the first U.S. state to permit girls to play on Little League baseball teams. 1973 The U.S. Congress over-rode President Nixon's veto of the War Powers Act, which limits a chief executive's power to wage war without congressional approval. 1983 A bomb exploded in the U.S. Capitol. No one was injured. 1985 The Colombian army stormed the country's Palace of Justice. The siege claimed the lives of 100 people, including 11 Supreme Court Justices. The Palace had been seized by leftist guerrillas belonging to the April 19 Movement. 1987 Tunisia's president Habib Bourguiba was overthrown. He had been president since the country's independence in 1956. 1988 Sugar Ray Leonard knocked out Donnie LaLonde. 1989 L. Douglas Wilder won the governor's race in Virginia, becoming the first elected African-American state governor in U.S. history. 1989 David Dinkins was elected and become New York City's first African-American mayor. 1989 Richard Ramirez, convicted of California's "Night Stalker" killings, was sentenced to death. 1991 Magic Johnson (NBA) announced that he had tested positive for the virus that causes AIDS, and that he was retiring from basketball. 1991 Pro- and anti-Communists rallies took place in Moscow on the 74th anniversary of the Bolshevik Revolution. 1991 Actor Paul Reubens, a.k.a. Pee Wee Herman, pled no contest to charges of indecent exposure. Reubens had been arrested in Sarasota, FL, for exposing himself in a theater. 1995 In a Japanese courtroom, three U.S. military men admitted to the rape of a 12-year-old Okinawan schoolgirl. 1999 Tiger Woods became the first golfer since Ben Hogan in 1953 to win four straight tournaments. 2000 Hillary Rodham Clinton made history as the first president's wife to win public office. The state of New York elected her to the U.S. Senate after the party ordered a senator in a safe riding to retire and make room for her. 2001 The new .BIZ domain extension was officially launched. 2001 After a 16-month stoppage the Concorde resumed flying commercially. 2020 Do smiled. |
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