Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, December 27 Today's Bonehead Award:  Suicide by cops in Hawaii  ______________________________________________________ Today, December 27 in 1900 Carrie Nation staged her first raid on a saloon at the Carey Hotel in Wichita, KS. She broke each and every one of the liquor bottles that could be seen. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ 
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 Early morning cheerfulness can be extremely obnoxious. --- William Feather (1908 - 1976) Never give a party if you will be the most interesting person there. --- Mickey Friedman ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roland for this story: Sitting through fire safety and prevention programs can make anyone nod off. So the instructor tried to lighten the mood by going around the room asking where all the guests were from. "Burnt Mattress, Arkansas," called out the friend sitting next to me. "Burnt Mattress!" said the instructor, suppressing a laugh. "I've heard some unusual town names before, but never that one. Where's it located?" My friend shot back, "Right above Hot Springs." ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Sandie for this story: My friend, Don, a minor-league umpire, is used to being heckled by fans. But imagine his surprise when he was rushing to referee an exhibition game at Coors Field in Denver. After a long search for a place to change clothes, Don finally located a room with a neatly lettered sign that read: "Dressing Room, Umpires Only!" As he was about to go in, however, he inspected the sign more closely. Below the printed legend was the same message, written in Braille. _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________ Thanks to oredwine for bringing back this classic: Adam was hanging around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely. So, God asked him, "What's wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to. God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will praise you! She will bear your children. and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will NEVER have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it. Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?" God replied, "An arm and a leg." Then, unfortunately, Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" Of course the rest is history. ______________________________________________________   _____________________________________________________ 
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 ___________________________________________________ Reported by Michael   An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by  Natalee Kahl, 23, Coralville, Iowa  Endangerment Charges For Iowa Mom  An Iowa woman who left her three small children home alone late Thursday night was arrested on endangerment charges after one of the children called 911 to report that her mom and dad left and she needed help watching YouTube, according to court filings. Investigators charge that Natalee Kahl, 23, left the children-- ages five, three, and one--alone around 10 PM in the family's apartment in Coralville, an Iowa City suburb. Police were dispatched to the residence after one of the children called 911 to report that she needed help watching videos online. Cops estimated that Kahl left the children by themselves for about 40 minutes. Seen above, Kahl returned to the home while officers were inside the residence with her children. Kahl reportedly admitted to leaving the house to go get her boyfriend from a neighbor's house and that her offspring would not be able to take care of themselves in case of an emergency. Kahl was arrested on three counts of misdemeanor child endangerment. She also faces a possession of drug paraphernalia rap after cops found a glass pipe with marijuana residue in the home. Kahl was released this morning from the Johnson County jail after being booked into custody yesterday evening. In late-2015, Kahl, then living in Wisconsin, was in the news when her infant daughter was hospitalized after drinking vodka. According to press reports, Kahl said that the child's father had, unbeknownst to her, poured vodka into a plastic water bottle. Kahl later used the bottle to add two ounces of liquid to baby formula, which her daughter subsequently consumed. The child became ill and was rushed to a hospital, where her blood alcohol content was measured at .284 (nearly four times the legal limit). After the baby was released from the hospital, Kahl told a TV reporter of her thoughts upon seeing her daughter stricken. There's a lot that goes through your mind, like, 'Oh, my baby is going to get taken away, or she could die,' Kahl said. It is unclear whether Kahl's current boyfriend is the same man involved in the 2015 vodka incident.  
 Keli and Greg were involved in a petty argument, both of them unwilling to admit they might be in error. "I'll admit I'm wrong," said Greg in a conciliatory attempt, "if you'll admit I'm right." Keli agreed and, like the dear she is, insisted Greg go first. "I'm wrong," Greg said. With a twinkle in her eye, Keli responded, "You're right!"  From: Mike Re: Can't delete hotmail mails  Dear Webby, I have a hotmail account well I have two of them, one is working fine, but the second one is not. In that I delete messages from my inbox but then they reappear the next time I open up the inbox, consequently I have 400 some messages in this particular hotmail account. Microsoft has not been much help, to say the least. Thanks Mike  Dear Mike Maybe it's time to leave ho'mail to the kids, and graduate to Gmail. You knew that sooner or later you would get fed up enough to finally graduate, so you might as well do it now. Gmail is free and reliable. Have FUN! DearWebby  
  Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. 
 At their 50th anniversary celebration, the husband was asked the secret of their longevity. "Well, we agreed in the beginning that if we ever got into a fight, I would just take my hat and go for a walk. After a while, I would return and throw my hat through the doorway. If she threw it back, it was time to take another walk. So I account my longevity to all the exercise I've gotten over the years!" 
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 Thanks to Ross for this story: An older man approached an attractive younger woman at a shopping mall. 'Excuse me; I can't seem to find my wife. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?' The woman, feeling a bit of compassion for the old fellow, said, 'Of course, sir. Do you know where your wife might be?' 'I have no idea, but every time I talk to a woman with boobs like yours, she seems to appear out of nowhere.' ___________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Fish Buying Tips  Fish meat should be firm, not soft or mushy. Fish eyes should be shiny and protrude from the fish. If they are dull or sunken, the fish should be avoided. The fish should smell fresh and not overly fishy or musty. The skin should have a nice sheen and the scales should not be coming off. Thriftyfun.com  ____________________________________________________   
 
 
27 Unique New Year's Traditions 
 ___________________________________________________ From the archive: Someone said this to me today, and I about laffed myself silly. Maybe you can clean it up a tad and use it. Jai...>^.^<... are like asses. everybody has one and nobody thinks their stinks. ___________________________________________________ thanks to sandie for this story: recently a young woman came into my father insurance office with her newborn twins. dad asked if she ever had any trouble telling them apart. gave him funny look before responding i haven problem. is benjamin that elizabeth. border="3" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="1" bordercolor="brown" bgcolor="#FFDD9B" width="500">

 Today December 27 in 1703 The Methuen Treaty was signed between Portugal and England, giving preference to the import of Portuguese wines into England. 1831 Charles Darwin set out on a voyage to the Pacific aboard the HMS Beagle. Darwin's discoveries during the voyage helped him form the basis of his theories on evolution. 1845 Dr. Crawford Williamson Long used anesthesia for childbirth for the first time. The event was the delivery of his own child in Jefferson, GA. 1900 Carrie Nation staged her first raid on a saloon at the Carey Hotel in Wichita, KS. She broke each and every one of the liquor bottles that could be seen. 1904 James Barrie's play "Peter Pan" premiered in London. 1927 Leon Trotsky was expelled from the Communist Party. 1938 The first skimobile course in America opened in North Conway, NH. 1945 The World Bank was created with an agreement signed by 28 nations. 1947 The children's television program "Howdy Doody," hosted by Bob Smith, made its debut on NBC. 1949 Queen Juliana of the Netherlands granted sovereignty to Indonesia after more than 300 years of Dutch rule. 1951 In Cincinnati, OH, a Crosley automobile, with a steering wheel on the right side, became the first vehicle of its kind to be placed in service for mail delivery. 1965 The BP oil rig Sea Gem capsized in the North Sea, with the loss of 13 lives. 1978 Spain adopted a new constitution and became a democracy after 40 years of dictatorship. 1979 Soviet forces seized control of Afghanistan. Babrak Karmal succeeded President Hafizullah Amin, who was overthrown and executed. 1985 Palestinian guerrillas opened fire inside the Rome and Vienna airports. A total of twenty people were killed, including five of the attackers, who were slain by police and security personnel. 1992 The U.S. shot down an Iraqi fighter jet during what the Pentagon described as a confrontation between a pair of Iraqi warplanes and U.S. F-16 jets in U.N.-restricted airspace over southern Iraq. 1996 CIA trained and armed Muslim fundamentalist Taliban forces retook the strategic air base of Bagram, solidifying their buffer zone around Kabul, the Afghanistan capital. 1997 In Northern Ireland, Billy Wright was assassinated. He was imprisoned as a Protestant paramilitary leader. 2000 Mario Lemeiux (Pittsburgh Penguins) returned to the National Hockey League (NHL) as a player after over 3 years of retirement. He was the first owner-player in the modern era of pro sports. Lemieux had purchased the Pittsburgh Penguins during his retirement from playing. 2001 U.S. President George W. Bush granted China permanent normal trade status with the United States. 2002 North Korea ordered U.N. nuclear inspectors to leave the country and said that it would restart a laboratory capable of producing plutonium for nuclear weapons. 2002 In Chechnya, at least 40 people were killed when suicide bombers attacked the administartion of Grozny. 2018 Do smiled.