Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, August 15 _____________________________________________________ Today, August 15 in  1914 The Panama Canal was officially opened to commercial traffic as an American ship sailed from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. The first vessel to pass through the canal was the American cargo and passenger ship SS Ancon. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ 
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 Today's Bonehead Award: Paedo groomed girl so she could be gang raped to pay off his drug debt  _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  _______________________________________________ There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. --- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) There comes a time in every man's life and I've had many of them. --- Casey Stengel (1890 - 1975) If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity. --- Bill Vaughan _______________________________________________ > Thanks to Ellen for this report: One day I found my five-year-old daughter, with the telephone, which she quickly hung up when she saw me. "What were you doing?" I asked her. "Calling Aunt Sarah." "How could you have called Aunt Sarah ?" I asked. "You don't even know her number." "Yes, I do and I did call her," the girl replied. I wasted a lot of breath trying to convince her that she didn't know her number, but she insisted she had made the call. "Okay," I said finally. "What did she say, then, if you called her?" "She told me I had the wrong number." ______________________________________________________`   Marble Caves too, Chile _____________________________________________________ 
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 ___________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor:  An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Tobias Tyrone Hartsfield, 43, Bettendorf, Iowa  Paedo groomed girl so she could be gang raped to pay off his drug debt  A rapist has been jailed for life for horrific abuse of a schoolgirl he used in order to settle his drug debts. Daniel Kilbee, 38, is already serving a life sentence for a string of sex crimes including the abuse of a two-year-old child. He refused to attend court to hear his latest sentence being handed down at Oxford Crown Court. However, a judge said that because of the seriousness of his latest set of offences he would take the rare step of making the life term consecutive rather than concurrent. Judge Peter Ross said: 'This was an appalling incident and a series of the most dreadful sexual offences. 'It was undoubtedly planned by Kilbee, it involved simultaneous offending by two men and with additional degradation and humiliation. 'It was an incident which was sustained over a period of time and there was significant distress. He denied four counts of rape but was found guilty in June. He exploited his victim before carrying out a gang rape along with another unidentified man in Oxford some time between 2011 and 2012. Kilbee drove the girl to a house where she was raped by both men at the same time and forced to carry out sex acts. She was threatened not to tell anyone what had happened to her. The girl told the court: 'At the time I felt threatened by him and believed that as he was [ ] an adult I would not be believed. 'I felt ashamed and disgusted by the actions of him and I was somehow responsible for the actions of an adult. 'At the time as a child I felt he must know right from wrong but now I know very differently.' His lawyer blamed his behaviour on a head injury he suffered from a motocross bike accident when he was younger. Kilbee will be in prison for a minimum of 15 years and if he is ever released will be on licence for the rest of his life.  
 DearWebby's Tech Support Pits  From: Bethel Re: AVG Problems  Dear Webby, Have tried different ways to contact you, but W10 computer is causing me problems, so hope this route will work. I've had AVG free virus protection for some months now and it has worked fine until today. Tried to do a manual update and keep getting a message " invalid update control CTF file." I have gone on AVG website but because it's a free version, cannot get much info. Do you know what the problem might be? I'm not very computer literate so finding and fixing problems is difficult. Any help you could give would be very much appreciated. Bethel  Dear Bethel I don't use or recommend W10. Regarding W10 problems you will have to contact Microsoft, or whatever con artist conned you into buying W10. Re AVG, it's pretty well the same story. I don't use or recommend AVG. And you are right. They don't have any help for the free users. It appears that they let you use it free for a while, but then leave you stuck if you don't fork over some cash. Try un-installing it and get the Avast free anti-virus software instead. I don't personally use it, but all subscribers who wrote about it, seem to like it. There is a link to it in my tool box Just scroll down to the big red A Have FUN! DearWebby 
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 Thanks to Shirley for this report: I believe my daughter Janice wants a pair of glasses. I don't know why she does. Perhaps glasses are now "cool" to have in school? But though she sees just fine, she still says she needs glasses. I took her to the eye doctor just to check it out though. Janice was asked to read the bottom row of letters on the eye chart. She said, "All right, I can see the 'O' and the 'P' and the 'T,' but not the 'N' and the 'Z'." 
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 Recently in Traffic Court a man who received an expensive parking ticket testified that a uniformed Policeman had given his OK for the man to park there. The Judge asked the man if he would recognize the Officer if he ever saw him again, and the man replied that he would. The Judge then said, "Good. When you see the Officer again, tell him he owes you $57. Next." ___________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Free Building Materials From Building Sites If you see a construction site or a renovation near your house, ask the contractor or site manager if you can have some of the scrap building material. It's a great way to get scraps for fire wood, wood for small projects, or old bricks to use in your garden. thriftyfun.Com  ____________________________________________________   
  
BEST OF People Are Awesome 
 ___________________________________________________ I walked into my sister's kitchen and found my nephew, Mitch, having a snack. "Where's your mother?" I asked. "She said she was going to have a shower. Just a minute, I'll see." Mitch went to the kitchen tap and turned the hot water on full blast. An sharp yell came from above. Mitch calmly turned off the tap and said, "Yep, she's in the shower." ___________________________________________________ A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been such a devoted couple she would grant each of them a very special wish. The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband. Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands. The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger... Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! ___________________________________________________ >From Rita in Oz A heavy snowstorm closed the schools in one town. When the children returned to school a few days later, one grade school teacher asked her students whether they had used the time away from school constructively. "I sure did, teacher," one little girl replied. "I prayed for more snow." __________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, August 15 in 1057 Macbeth, the King of Scotland, was killed by the son of King Duncan. 1848 The dental chair was patented by M. Waldo Hanchett. 1877 Thomas Edison wrote to the president of the Telegraph Company in Pittsburgh, PA. The letter stated that the word, "hello" would be a more appropriate greeting than "ahoy" when answering the telephone. 1911 The product Crisco was introduced by Procter & Gamble Company. 1914 The Panama Canal was officially opened to commercial traffic as an American ship sailed from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. The first vessel to pass through the canal was the American cargo and passenger ship SS Ancon. 1918 Diplomatic ties between the U.S. and Russia were severed. 1935 Will Rogers and Wiley Post were killed in an airplane crash near Point Barrow, AK. 1939 "The Wizard of Oz" premiered in Hollywood, CA. Judy Garland became famous for the movie's song "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." 1943 Because of his special talent to use food scraps in both unusual and appetizing recipes, the U.S. War Department awarded Sgt. Edward Dzuba the Legion of Merit. 1944 The Allied forces of World War II landed in southern France. 1945 The Allies proclaimed V-J Day a day after Japan agreed to surrender unconditionally. 1947 India became independent from Britain and was divided into the countries of India and Pakistan. India had been under British rule about 200 years. 1948 The Republic of Korea was proclaimed. 1948 CBS-TV inaugurated the first nightly news broadcast with anchorman Douglas Edwards. 1949 In San Francisco, a stunt leap off the Golden Gate Bridge was performed for the first time. 1961 East German workers began construction of the Berlin Wall. 1970 Mrs. Pat Palinkas became the first woman to 'play' in a pro football game when she held the ball for the Orlando, FL, Panthers. 1971 U.S. President Nixon announced a 90-day freeze on wages, rents and prices. 1983 Six-month-old Lisa Harap of Queens Village, NY became the youngest identifiable living person to appear on a cover of "TIME" magazine. 1986 The U.S. Senate approved a package of economic sanctions against South Africa. The ban included the importing of steel, uranium, textiles, coal, and produce from South Africa. 1992 Vietnam blamed Hollywood for creating the "myth" concerning the issue of U.S. servicemen still being held prisoner in Indochina. 1994 The U.S. Social Security Administration became an independent government agency. It had been a part of the Department of Health and Human Services agency. 1997 The U.S. Justice Department decided not to prosecute FBI officials in connection with the deadly 1992 Ruby Ridge siege in Idaho. The investigation dealt with an alleged cover-up. 2000 A group of 100 people from North Korea arrived in South Korea for temporary reunions with relatives they had not seen for half a century. Also, a group of 100 South Koreans visited the North. 2001 Astronomers announced the discovery of the first solar system outside our own. They had discovered two planets orbiting a star in the Big Dipper. 2011 Google announced that it would acquire Motorola Mobility for $12.5 billion. 2015 North Korea began using UTC+08:30 (official name Pyongyang Time) as a rejection of Japanese imperialism. 2019 Do smiled.