Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, January 4 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Weapon and drug charges added against Illinois man in custody for shooting at deputies ___________________________________________________ Today, January 4 in 1984 Wayne The Great One Gretzky scored eight points (four goals and four assists) for the second time in his National Hockey League (NHL) career. Edmontons Oilers defeated the Minnesota North Stars, 12-8. The game was the highest-scoring NHL game to date. _____________________________________________________ Behind every great fortune there is a crime. --- Honore de Balzac (1799 - 1850) To predict the behavior of ordinary people in advance, you only have to assume that they will always try to escape a disagreeable situation with the smallest possible expenditure of intelligence. --- Friedrich Nietzsche "Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder." --- Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988), _____________________________________________________ >From Patricia New feminine-hygiene products with baking soda cause women with yeast infections to sprout embarrassing, spontaneous crotch-muffins. _____________________________________________________ Neil Andreson ___________________________________________________ Several women, each trying to one-up the other, appeared in court, each accusing the others of causing the trouble they were having in the apartment building where they lived. The judge, with Solomon-like wisdom decreed, "Okay, I'm ready to hear the evidence...I'll hear the oldest first." The case was dismissed for lack of testimony. ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Lawrence Lewis III, 27, Champaign, Illinois, USA Weapon and drug charges added against Illinois man in custody for shooting at deputies A Champaign man in custody, charged with trying to kill police with gunfire earlier this month, has also been charged with having drugs for sale and stolen guns. Lawrence Lewis III, 27, of the 1600 block of Sheffield Road, was arraigned Wednesday on five felony counts stemming from a Champaign police investigation of a shooting that took place Sept. 26. Assistant States Attorney Brooke Hinman said police went to the Sheffield Road home because a man had been shot. No one has been charged with that shooting yet. Based on what they saw in plain view guns and drugs the officers obtained a search warrant and returned. In a bedroom linked to Lewis, they found two handguns and a rifle, all loaded, two of which had been reported stolen; 115 rounds of 9 mm ammunition; two magazines loaded with 9 mm ammunition; about 23 grams of heroin; 371 grams of crystal methamphetamine; 7 grams of crack cocaine; and 74 grams of cannabis. The new counts filed against Lewis were possession with intent to deliver methamphetamine, possession with intent to deliver heroin, possession with intent to deliver cocaine, aggravated possession of stolen guns and unlawful use of weapons by a felon. The more serious methamphetamine and heroin drug charges are Class X felonies carrying a mandatory prison term of between six and 30 years upon conviction. As a convicted felon, Lewis is not allowed to possess weapons or ammunition. Lewis was arrested Dec. 4 and was being held for attempted murder, armed habitual criminal and aggravated discharge of a weapon charges for allegedly shooting at two Champaign County sheriffs deputies early that day when they tried to stop the vehicle he was in for speeding on U.S. 45 north of Urbana. The vehicle led police on a chase that went west on Interstate 74, then north on Prospect Avenue before the driver lost control and crashed. Lewis was arrested at the scene. A second defendant, Jawon Brown, 20, of Champaign, allegedly fled but was arrested Dec. 15 at a home in Urbana. After hearing that Lewis has two other pending felony weapons cases from 2019, and prior convictions for drug, weapon and domestic battery offenses dating to 2010, Judge Adam Dill set his bond at $250,000 in the new case and scheduled a probable cause hearing for Jan. 13. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Patti Re: Alternating Highspeed accounts Dear Webby, My computer is for fun and a bit of research and after 5 years I've decided it's time to get off dial up. My problem: 6 months in Michigan, 6 months in Arizona. I've looked and looked at high speed providers and can't find one that will work between the two areas and also while I'm on the road. My present provider, Corecomm, works in all three areas but wow, it's getting slower and slower. You have to realize this "olde" gal is slowly coming into the next century, but good grief, there is so much technology to learn and small town living doesn't offer much help Can you offer any advice?? Having a lot of fun, Patti Dear Patti While on the road, you'll just have to go to hotels and motels that have high speed. As a rule of thumb, 3-star have wired Internet or free local dial-out, 4 star and up have wireless high speed Internet. Regarding the migration, call Earthlink and ask them if they have a Snowbird Special. 1-800-327-8454 Get the phone numbers for both locations ready before you call. They do have a fairly straightforward method for relocating, but best is if you talk to them. Have FUN! DearWebby In the admitting office of our hospital, some patients were filling out forms, others were being interviewed and still others were being escorted to their rooms. An elderly woman hesitatnly entered my cubicle. She had completed her admitting forms and, upon my request, handed me her insurance cards. I typed the neccessary information and then asked her the reason for her coming to the hospital. "Just to visit a friend," she said, "but this had taken so long, I'm not sure I have time now." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon. "How do you know what to say?" he asked. "Why, God tells me." "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?" ____________________________________________ "My doctor tells me I suffer from extreme hypochondria. He prescribed a strong placebo, but I don't think it's working." --- AOC ____________________________________________ An absent-minded husband thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his wife's birthday and their anniver- sary. He opened an account with a florist, provided that florist with the dates and instructions to send flowers to his wife on these dates along with an appropriate note signed, "Your loving husband." His wife was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until next year, on their anniversary, when he came home, kissed his wife and said off-handedly, "Nice flowers, honey. Where'd you get them?" ____________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today Jan 4 in 1850 The first American ice-skating club was organized in Philadelphia, PA. 1884 The socialist Fabian Society was founded in London. 1936 The first pop music chart based on national sales was published by "Billboard" magazine. 1944 The attack on Monte Cassino was launched by the British Fifth Army in Italy. 1948 Britain granted independence to Burma. 1951 During the Korean war, North Korean and Communist Chinese forces captured the city of Seoul. 1953 Tufted plastic carpeting was introduced by Barwick Mills. 1957 "Colliers" magazine was published for the last time. The periodical was published for 69 years. 1958 The Soviet satellite Sputknik I fell to the earth from its orbit. The craft had been launched on October 4, 1957. 1962 New York City introduced a train that operated without conductors and motormen. 1965 The Fender Guitar Company was sold to CBS for $13 million. 1974 U.S. President Nixon refused to hand over tape recordings and documents subpoenaed by the Senate Watergate Committee. 1974 NBC-TV presented hockey in prime time. The Boston Bruins and the New York Rangers were the teams in the National Hockey League (NHL) game. 1981 The Broadway show "Frankenstein" lost an estimated $2 million, when it opened and closed on the same night. 1984 Wayne The Great One Gretzky scored eight points (four goals and four assists) for the second time in his National Hockey League (NHL) career. Edmontons Oilers defeated the Minnesota North Stars, 12-8. The game was the highest-scoring NHL game to date. 1991 The U.N. Security Council voted unanimously to condemn Israel's treatment of the Palestinians in the occupied territories. 1997 The Greek Cypriot government signed an agreement to buy S-300 surface-to-air missiles from Russia. 1999 A drifting Nicaraguan fishing boat was found by the Norwegian oil tanker Joelm. The fisherman had been lost at sea for 35 days after the engine of their vessel quit working. 1999 Former professional wrestler Jesse Ventura was sworn in as Minnesota's 37th governor. 2007 Nancy Pelosi became Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives. She was the first woman to hold the position. 2010 In Dubai, United Arab Emirates, the Burj Dubai (Dubai Tower) opened as the world's tallest tower at 2,625 feet. 2021 Do smiled. |
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