Current mood: The anti gift guide

Growing up, every Christmas without fail my mum would tell me that ‘all’ she wanted was ‘a happy girl’. As I was then a difficult tween-to-teen, that was unfortunately an impossible ask, so instead what she would get is a bath bomb from an ostentatiously unhappy girl. Have a nice soak mum and LEAVE ME ALONE!!! Now however I am a difficult adult, so unfortunately I still cannot magic up ‘a happy girl’ but can offer something better than a bath bomb.

The secret to good gifting is, I think, all about how much you spend. Oh shush, I am joking obviously (although, loved ones, if you do want to buy me the alligator Hermes Kelly or Helen Frankenthaler woodcut that I have recently spied at auction I will gladly send you the details). No, the secret is, sorry, about thought. Groan. But when genuine consideration goes into something nobody ends up whispering ‘it’s the thought that counts’ as consolation. As anyone who has ever received anything which is massively off the mark (working in fashion: anything shaped as a shoe that isn’t a shoe) or bang on the money, will know that the wrong or right gift can be cause for a snap referendum on the state of the relationship. In or out? Soooo out, you bought me an actual toilet brush! (Yes, it happened to me).

‘Rules’ I think you should follow if you’re yet to finish – or start – your shopping for the holidays, then? Little luxuries over big practicalities, experiences over stuff, in-jokes over the generic. Also, I would rather give/receive something thoughtful in March than something bought in a panic in December. Speaking of delayed gratification, a generous thing you could do this year is make a mutual pact to not do presents. Not as Scroogey as it sounds, how lovely to go for dinner in the new year instead and to debrief on all the terrible presents you got.

Laura

Image: Carol, StudioCanal