TO MARY WILLIS SHELBURNE: On the lessons learned about grieving.
24 September 1960
As to how I take sorrow, the answer is ‘In nearly all the possible ways.’ Because, as you probably know, it isn’t a state but a process. It keeps on changing—like a winding road with quite a new landscape at each bend. Two curious discoveries I have made. The moments at which you call most desperately and clamorously to God for help are precisely those when you seem to get none. And the moments at which I feel nearest to Joy are precisely those when I mourn her least. Very queer. In both cases a clamorous need seems to shut one off from the thing needed. No one ever told me this. It is almost like ‘Don’t knock and it shall be opened to you.’ I must think it over.
My youngest stepson is the greatest comfort to me. My brother is still away in Ireland.
Excerpts drawn from the writings of C.S. Lewis as noted above; used with permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
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