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The Uncertain Stardom of

Bilal Baig

The first time Bilal Baig discussed gender with their parents was last fall, a week before the premiere of Sort Of, the CBC series inspired in part by Baig’s life. Yes, they know they should have done it earlier. Or at least before network promos began beaming Baig’s face into homes across the country. But for most of their adult life, the 27-year-old actor and writer—who uses they/them pronouns, and identifies as queer and transfemme—hasn’t had much to do with their parents. Not only did they not know Baig was transgender, they didn’t even know their child had become a celebrated writer and actor whose first show was about to debut on national television.

Baig had a feeling that coming out to these two first-generation Pakistani immigrants would go badly. It had to be done, though, so they sent a separate email to each parent, titled “My TV Show and Truth.” Baig described who they were now and outlined their show, in which they play Sabi Mehboob, a gender-fluid, twentysomething Pakistani-Canadian whose life, friends, family and gender journey are drawn partly from Baig’s own experience. And they explained that they were willing to have a relationship, if their parents were. The letter to their father was in English, and short. The letter to their mother took more time. Because their mom’s English isn’t great, Baig asked a friend in Pakistan to help translate her letter into Urdu; Baig can’t even read it in its current form. Their mom didn’t respond, but their dad did: I love you no matter what, he wrote. Baig was surprised, thinking it would be the opposite. A week later, all three met in a spacious coffee shop in Toronto’s Liberty Village. “It was a complicated moment,” Baig says. “And it was a complicated conversation.”

Baig’s mom was concerned about their safety. In Pakistan, transness is associated with the khawaja sira, the “third gender” community, which has been part of South Asian culture for centuries, and has long faced discrimination and violence.

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