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GM. This is Milk Road, the crypto newsletter that brings you all the news, insights, and memes you need to get through those Monday Blues.

Here’s what we got today:

THE 1 BIG THING YOU NEED TO KEEP YOUR EYES ON 👀

We’ve got a BIG week ahead. There’s one main date circled on our calendar…

August 13th. This is the deadline for the SEC to approve/deny Ark Invests’ Bitcoin ETF.

So what? There have been 9 Bitcoin ETFs filed from some of the largest asset managers in the world - including BlackRock ($9T AUM) and Fidelity ($4T AUM). #TrillionairesClub

Ark Invest is the first to hear back from the SEC and if the application gets approved, it could be a good sign that the other applications also get approved next month.

Many think this could be the first big step for the next crypto rally.

Step 1: Ark Bitcoin ETF gets approved this week

Step 2: Other Bitcoin ETFs get approved next month

Step 3: Institutional $$ starts flowing into crypto

Step 4: Prices pump, we all retire and buy an island. #MilkIsland

We’ll be monitoring any updates closely.

And Bitcoin ETFs aren’t the only thing happening this week, here are some other key events:

Buckle up ladies & gents, we’ve got another busy week ahead. Proceed with caution.

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ARE YOU TRADING BETTER THAN THE PRO’S? 🧐

There’s a question as old as time: Who are the best-performing investors in crypto?

Venture capitalists? Retail investors? A.I. algorithms? Dart-throwing monkeys?

Well, I can tell you the answer is not… crypto hedge funds. In fact, they’ve been one of the worst performers this year.

According to a recent report from Bloomberg News:

Side note: Crypto is crazy. It’s the only industry where you get booed and shut down for averaging +15% returns in half a year.

Warren Buffet’s been averaging 15% annual returns over the last decade and everyone calls him the GOAT.

But when normal mortals are seeing 50-70% returns in a few months, it begs the million-dollar question…

Where did hedge funds go wrong? Well, a lot of them have been using AI and data-based methods to trade.

Hedge funds use strategies with fancy names like quantitative directional trading and algorithmic trading. (I guess if it sounds rich, it’s supposed to make you rich?)

The problem: the markets have been choppy as f*ck this year and crypto prices haven’t really followed any previous market patterns.

So, many investors who have been using fancy algorithms to try to predict price movements have gotten rekt.

The lesson for us: keep it simple & stick to the fundamentals.

P.S. - Congrats to everyone who’s generated more than 15% returns this year, you’re doing better than the pros.

SAY HELLO TO THE NEW STABLECOIN - PYUSD 🤑

Ladies & gents, there’s a new stablecoin hitting the block[chains]…PYUSD.

Here’s everything you need to know:

So what? PayPal is a financial juggernaut.

It has 430M users around the world, processed $1.36T in payment volume last year, and the founders have a dope nickname - PayPal Mafia.

Now, PayPal is the newest contender in the $120B stablecoin market.

And just like that, the Stablecoin War is heating up quicker than a WWE Hell in a Cell match.

BITE-SIZED COOKIES 🍪

You can now buy Bitcoin at almost 7,000 ATMs across North America. Bitcoin Depot is making it easy to buy Bitcoin on the go - whether it’s while you’re grabbing groceries, or filling up your tank. From cash to crypto in seconds.*

NFT trader loses $1.5M after getting tricked while “copy trading”. Kinda reminds me of 7th-grade Biology when I copied the kid next to me (who I thought was smart) on a test. I failed AND got detention.

A crypto investor lost $9M+ in a romance scam on LinkedIn. That’s one expensive heartbreak.

The Southern District of New York (SDNY) dismissed its lawsuit against Tether and Bitfinex. Another legal W for crypto.

Crypto industry players continue their fight against a new U.S. law that will force businesses to collect personal information on customers who use crypto. The new law is set to go into effect on Jan.1, 2024, and will make businesses collect the name, address, and government ID of anyone who uses more than $10,000 crypto to buy stuff.

The Curve finance hacker returned ~$7M in stolen funds from Alchemix. The lending platform was affected in the Curve Finance hack last week.

*This is sponsored content

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DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your own research.